Does our society hold contempt for people who try too hard?

It depends on if they’re being deceptive and too competitive while trying.

Can you give an example? I am not aware of contempt for people trying too hard.

The question is much too vague. Be specific, please.

How can you begin to define what trying too hard means. A four-year-old on a jungle
gym, an Olympic runner in last place, me trying to cut Milo’s nails?

What is too hard, and who is contemptuous of someone who works hard?

Personally I think our work ethic is highly over rated and dysfunctional. I go with the Buddhist ideal that 6 hours of work a day is more than enough to keep the balance.
I agree with @gailcalled, what exactly does “trying too hard” mean?
Personally I don’t really effort, I just let things unfold and abhore competition unless it’s something fun and creative like entering a photo in a photo contest.

Workaholism is not any more healthy than being a shiftless slob. Same rope different ends.
Infact, it has been shown that people with LOW self esteem are more likely to be workaholics and those that have a healthy self esteem don’t drive themselves into the ground, take adequate rest and space and set boundaries protecting their free time.

I think so, yes. American society calls high reaching, consistent and productive workers “brown nosers” yet if aggression, ambition and ruthlessness are combined then those workers suddenly get respect and awe.

It depends what they’re trying hard at, e.g. being cool, fitting in.

Did that monolith, American society, call Mark Zuckerburg and Steve Job “brown noses”?

I do take issue with the premise of this question.

What does it mean to try too hard? I think that is a condescending judgment to make. You can only say that when you have a thing and you see someone who also wants it, only they don’t seem to have whatever it takes to get it. Still, they keep trying, and you look down your nose at them and pronounce that they try too hard.

If that’s what you mean, then I don’t think it’s something our society looks down on. I think it’s something people obsessed with status look down on. They have status, and they are shaking their heads and saying that it is hopeless for others to try to be like them. They just don’t have what it takes, and they never will.

It’s terribly obnoxious. Terribly judgmental. It isn’t very pretty.

But yes, there is a portion of society that is status conscious and behaves this way. They do hold contempt for those they deem to be poseurs. Personally, I think they are even sadder than the poseurs, who at least know what they want, even if they don’t know how to get it. The people who sit there and judge don’t have real lives. They don’t do. They judge. Or they do judging, which is a kind of sycophantic, parasitic way of living.

If “trying too hard” means that the person sacrifices their relationships with their family and friends, or compromises their personal values or does some dishonest or unethical things to get ahead, than contempt is deserved.

Is someone who is obsessive-compulsive trying too hard? Those who are so driven that they loose sight of the value of family and friends deserve pity, not contempt. Neither do people who believe in doing their best in whatever they do deserve contempt. They should be rewarded for their sense of responsibility and willingness to work hard.

However, less motivated individuals believe such behavior should be eliminated. As a young man I worked on an assembly line. Big Ed, a long time employee of the company, objected to my efficiency saying, “Are you trying to kill the job?” Contempt from such people made outsourcing profitable, despite the cost of shipping unassembled parts to foreign countries and shipping finished goods back to America. (Being able to pay slave wages without benefits to overseas workers also helped to make that decision.)

I don’t know if it’s contempt, exactly, but I do know what you’re talking about. In a social context, some people do seem to look down on poseurs, and some feel sorry for them. A lot of people don’t like them, personality-wise. I’m not sure what it’s all about, but it’s definitely there.

Again, I think I might have worded this a bit poorly. Perhaps not contempt. But I do think there is an unhealthy preoccupation with not trying too hard. Not just judging others, but also directed towards ourselves. Academically, professionally, or even personally.

Just a few days ago, a question came up on Fluther about trying too hard. It also seems to pop up in popular media as a common archetype that elicits pity, if not contempt.

I know it may annoy a few people, but I do like to keep things vague. I want to hear what you think of it. Versus people just commenting on what I think of it.