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anniereborn's avatar

A question for those 55 and over?

Asked by anniereborn (13583points) May 26th, 2015

I am turning 47 soon. I often think “I wish I was younger, I miss this this and this and I should’ve done this and this”. Well I don’t want to be 20 years older and think “I miss this this and this and shoulda done this this and this”.

What things do you regret not doing or appreciating when you were in your 40s/early 50s?

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20 Answers

marinelife's avatar

Traveling more.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I’ve lived my life by one idea. You don’t know if you don’t try. It’s usually treated me really well. I have been hosed occasionally but I just laugh and try something else. I don’t think I have any regrets.
And I’m not 55 yet.

janbb's avatar

I wish I had had more romantic and sensual love when I was younger but then I wouldn’t have been raising my kids with my Ex so there’s not much to do about that.

In terms of my health and abilities, they are as good if not better than they were when I was in my 40s so that’s not an issue. And I am independent now.

And after reading Judi’s answer, I am so rich right now in the friendships and connections I have made that it is probably one of the best times in my life.

Coloma's avatar

My 40’s were the single, most growth producing decade of my life. Major ch, ch, changes. haha
Chose to divorce from a long term unhappy and dysfunctional marriage, bought my own home, had 2 jobs I loved, traveled, was so completely content and satisfied and absolutely joyful reclaiming myself. I have zero regrets other than the fact that my decade of growth and bliss to the 10th power was destroyed by the economic downfall between 2010–2013.

I lost everything and it’s been and continues to be a challenge, living with grave uncertainty, starting to have some weird health problems, but…I can truly say I have been on both sides of just about every fence there is and I have zero regrets, just wish my nirvana could have been preserved but, I soldier on and am resilient, resourceful and adaptive and try to preserve a good sense of humor.

I call my turn of events the “trifuckta”. lol
Losing my work, home/life savings on the cusp of my age and some health issues showing up. Gotta keep that sardonic wit alive, life really is a cosmic joke.

Judi's avatar

When younger than you I contemplated the same question and vowed to live my life with no regrets.
No one else knows what that means for you, but when faced with a choice or an opportunity, ask yourself, “How will I see this when I look back from my death bed?”
What has been true for me, and what I am trying to do with varying degrees of success, is to nurture relationships.
Yes, I HAVE traveled the world, but the most important thing I want to look back on when I’m dying is the lives that I have positively touched. (I’m only 54 but answered anyway.)

LuckyGuy's avatar

Hindsight is 20–20.

I’m pretty happy with the way things turned out. I’m financially secure, have friends and family, and am in great shape. I’ve traveled and lived in a wide variety of countries. But as an engineer I am always thinking about how to make things better.
Here’s what comes to mind:
I would have demanded a prostate cancer screening, PSA test when I had my “complete” physicals at age 45, 50,and 55. (All men should!)
I would have been a little wilder and made love more while I still had my prostate. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss it every day.
I’d have quit working for a faceless, thieving, money grubbing company and started my own business a few years earlier.

Life is good!

Aster's avatar

Traveling and staying in college.

stanleybmanly's avatar

I regret that I didn’t anticipate the rightward polarization of the middle class when confronted with its own demise. Who could have guessed that those responsible for engineering the decline could get away with not only shifting the blame, but actually calling the tune to impoverishment, knowing the goobers would dance to it.

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

Love myself more, by which I mean be happy with who I am and how I look.

Totally agree with @marinelife. Travel more. If I could I’d spend my life travelling the world.

Write more. Keep a journal so I remember the people, places, names that have disappeared from my memory.

rojo's avatar

Should have started purchasing rental property sooner.

Still want to walk the Pacific Coast Trail and the Rocky Mountain One. Wish I had done it sooner.

Sorry I did not take better care of my feet and knees when younger.

trailsillustrated's avatar

I wish I had done the job I do now, my whole career. I’d own lots of property.

NomoreY_A's avatar

What, me worry?

LadyMarissa's avatar

I was born somewhat a daredevil & my motto once I moved away from my parents was “I’ll try anything once or twice IF I liked it!!!” So, in my lifetime, there wasn’t much that I had the opportunity to try that I didn’t at least dabble in. Somewhere between 50 &60 I realized that there were a lot of things that I tried & enjoyed but NO longer had the desire to continue doing!!! Still, I don’t regret ever trying the things I did try although they are not right for me now, they were PERFECT for me at the time I experienced them!!!

IF you’re having regrets…MAKE UP FOR LOST TIME. I don’t care what society tells you…YOU’RE NEVER TOO OLD TO HAVE FUN!!!

Pushing yourself to do fun things will help to keep your life from becoming boring!!!

NomoreY_A's avatar

I’ll settle for a cold beer and a lawn chair.

LadyMarissa's avatar

@NomoreY_A IF that’s what makes you happy…GO FOR IT!!!

NomoreY_A's avatar

Great minds think alike Marissa!

LadyMarissa's avatar

@NomoreY_A I might warn you that drinking the beer probably won’t be a problem; however, getting up. & out of the lawn chair may become problematic. I truly hope you enjoy your plan as much as you think you will!!!

NomoreY_A's avatar

@LadyMarrisa…been there done that. Got plastered and tripped over my coffee table and got a hell of a bump on my head. Getting out of the chair is easy but walking, meh… not so much. But I only do that now in a great while at home. If I go out I stick to Coke or ice water..Oddly, my wife gave me an ice compress but otherwise had no sympathy for me. : (

LadyMarissa's avatar

Your wife is a brilliant woman!!!

NomoreY_A's avatar

Harsh, so very harsh! Women can be cruel and uncaring at times. Why couldn’t she have held and patted my back? I don’t like pain. Pain hurts.

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