General Question

The_Inquisitor's avatar

Do people see a guy hitting a girl as a bad thing?

Asked by The_Inquisitor (3158points) December 2nd, 2008

I know someone who has once said something about how no matter if it’s a girl or a guy, he would hit back all the same. Does anyone find that a bit harsh? I know we’re not living in the days of chivalry, but really, I like the “Don’t hit girls” thing. (then again.. is that even under the topic of chivalry? lol. i’m clueless. =\)
Understanding that if a female was brutally attacking a male, he would have to defend himself, but excluding that… Is there ANY time a guy hitting a girl is right?
where it has nothing to do with defense? I can’t think up an example. just want to see other ppl’s views on this.

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46 Answers

shadling21's avatar

I don’t think that hitting another human being is the right thing to do, unless they attack you first. Gender is irrelevant.

EDIT: I mean, if you have to resort to violence to stop the violence. That’s when it’s okay.

Allie's avatar

No, I don’t think it’s okay for guys to hit girls. Provided I don’t think it’s okay for girls to hit guys either, but some of them do… and there are some guys who hit girls. But none of that makes it okay.

Mtl_zack's avatar

“Brutally” is subjective. It is the defender’s choice.

asmonet's avatar

That’s fucked up.

Men have more strength in their upper bodies and women are in general weaker physically in their upper bodies, the blows are not equal and the man will do more damage. Unacceptable.

shadling21's avatar

@as- What’s fucked up?

Mtl_zack's avatar

@asmonet: What about kicking? Women can kick higher than men because they have less baggage and that provides more flexibility.

augustlan's avatar

In general, I don’t think guys should hit girls, unless in self-defense. Girls shouldn’t hit guys either, but – again in general – the chances of actual physical harm are much greater if a guy hits a girl.

asmonet's avatar

@shadling: Men beating on women. Or even just smacking them once. They’re more aggressive, more inclined to violence statistically, it’s just not a good combination.

@zack: How many times have you been in a fight and your first thought was to roundhouse someone? Follow-up question, are you Chuck Norris?

shadling21's avatar

Chuck Norris is omnipotent; he is everyone.

Mtl_zack's avatar

I have never been in a situation like that, but many girls I know are taught that whenever a guy approaches them in a strange way, kick ‘em in the nuts.

A friend of a friend (who I’ve met) had a few too many drinks and was hitting on girls in a bar in a less appropriate way and one girl missed his nuts and got him in the chin. Apparently, the bar was cleared out.

No, I am not Chuck Norris. :(

madcapper's avatar

uhhh yes…
beating children on the other hand should be ok’d

asmonet's avatar

@shadling: Chuck Norris doesn’t do push ups, he pushes the Earth down.

@zack: You’re jealous of his wondrous power. I’ve kicked a dude in the nuts a few times. It’s fun! :D Let that be a lesson to you men, don’t hit on a redhead in a creepy fashion. No means no, or no means a testicular retrieval surgery. Understand?

@mad: I sincerely hope that was sarcasm.

madcapper's avatar

I’m not so sure…
When I have kids I’ll tell you how I feel in-depth haha

funkdaddy's avatar

I think gender has to play a role in your decision because it will play a huge role in how you are judged on your actions. It’s just unacceptable in the eyes of the law and society at large for a male to hit a female. In my opinion that’s a good thing.

On the flip side, people seem more likely to jump in and stop a confrontation between a guy and a girl for a variety of reason, no matter who the aggressor is. Which I guess works out well.

Also, defending yourself is a lot different than actively hurting someone. There’s a lot of ways to stop yourself from getting hit without hurting the other person. The best is to remove yourself from the situation.

asmonet's avatar

@mad: Never touch your kids. Trust me, it will not work out in your favor.

shadling21's avatar

@funk – Well said.

madcapper's avatar

what if my child is a girl though… now there’s a thinker…

Honestly though there are times when I have been in a store and some dead-eyed parent is just dragging their screaming little shit along behind them and I think ” give the little brat a taste of the back of your hand and perhaps they will quit ruining your life and the lives of those around you.”

madcapper's avatar

in reality I joke. I doubt I would ever harm my child, I was never raised that way.

Bluefreedom's avatar

I don’t think a man should lift a hand to strike a woman, ever. I’ve never done it and I never will and if someone resorts to doing this, they have serious problems that they need to rectify, in my opinion.

TheKitchenSink's avatar

I think it’s okay. In context. I mean, wifebeating and such isn’t cool. There’s no need for that. But if some girl is totally asking for it, to the level that a guy would get punched, I say don’t discriminate.

but nobody wants to hear what I think

asmonet's avatar

@mad: :D I sometimes think that way too. But as a kid who got her fair share of ass kickings by the adults in my life, and trust me, they were ass kickings, I personally think it does nothing but make the child resent you.

But yeah, those little fuckers in stores make me rethink my position. Too bad it’s really bad parenting that’s just being reflected in the kid. That’s when I start thinking I should Chuck Norris mommy and daddy.

steve6's avatar

I was always taught never hit a woman. If that’s too hard for you, try therapy.

madcapper's avatar

haha very good answer asmonet!

richardhenry's avatar

No, it’s not okay for a guy to hit a girl. If she’s hitting you, then just get the hell out of there. There’s no need to hit back.

Wine3213's avatar

Guys should never hit a girl. Unless she’s a professional fighter, and she’s out to kick you butt. (JK) No, there is no reason to hit a woman. Just like there is no reason for a woman to hit a man. Some girls try to push it though, but there a ways to solve that without hitting them.

Wine3213's avatar

Oh yeah, if you’re a guy, and you’re 5’ tall. Then you should be able to hit a girl 5’ 11” and taller. Or if she out-weighs you by 30 lbs. :)

richardhenry's avatar

Right, yeah. I guess she could be the exception to the rule. That’s like punch, and then run.

Allie's avatar

Rich: Your link says 403 forbidden.

MacBean's avatar

Nobody should hit anybody else. Gender shouldn’t even be a factor. There are, of course, times when violence is acceptable—for example, if someone is coming at you with intent to kill and running isn’t an option—but they’re few and far between.

Response moderated
madcapper's avatar

Haha what was said that warranted it being removed?

wundayatta's avatar

I totally agree with MacBean. No one should ever hit anyone else!

We teach our kids to “use your words.” Violence is a peculiarly ineffective way of problem solving, if you care about consequences more distant than ten minutes out.

Of course, the world doesn’t follow my shoulds. Given that, tit for tat is the best policy to get people back to the non-hitting mode. So, yes, if the woman hits the man repeatedly, the man should hit back after a tiny time lag to see if she will stop on her own.

The opposite is true, too. Of course, differentials in size and strength may mean that the hitting back takes a different form, and may not be immediate.

tonedef's avatar

On the question of chivalry, all I could find was “Respect women.” Very nebulous.

Men ought not hit women in the same way that a White person ought not call a Black person “uppity.” It’s just tacky, and is connected to historical wrongs against that group. I’m not saying that every time a man hits a women, it’s a domestic violence situation, or that he’s treating her like property. It’s just in poor taste.

bodyhead's avatar

I’m surprised that no one has brought up the Chris Rock bit.

You can never hit a woman… but you can shake the shit out of her

I’m not inclined to hit people at all. If someone is weaker then me, I can restrain them without amping up the violence. If they are stronger then me and trying to do me harm, I will protect myself regardless of sex.

But this always makes me think of the age old question I use to ask my gun safety teacher.

Why is it equally bad to shoot a man or woman but worse to hit a woman?

jessturtle23's avatar

Women shouldn’t hit guys in the first place or anyone for that matter. They are typically stronger and you can only hit someone for so long before they hit you back. I do come from Whitetrashville where I have seen this often. Also, girls, do not try to break up fights between two men. I have seen a chick get her nose broken and she didn’t even know the guys, she just wanted to get in on the drama.

DrasticDreamer's avatar

I agree with everyone else who said no one should hit anyone. That said, as a general rule, guys shouldn’t hit back because women tend to have much weaker upper body strength. That said, if for some reason a guy is being attacked by a woman who is his equal in strength, by all means, punch her to get her away from you.

I’ve seen women attack men before who, although not as strong as the man, were pure insanity and the guys couldn’t do anything to get away but shove pretty damn hard, to the point of knocking her down. I see nothing wrong with that.

quarkquarkquark's avatar

Basically it’s only okay if she really deserves it, i.e. if she talks back, forgets to do laundry, doesn’t have your lunch ready, etc..

wundayatta's avatar

But Dude. You were gonna lick-shine my boots this morning, and you missed a spot. I’m a gonna enjoy teachin’ you da meanin’ of pain!~

Nimis's avatar

DrasticDreamer: Agreed. Crazy batshit trumps strength and size. I once saw this 6’4” guy curl up into a fetal position while his 4’11” psycho girlfriend waled on him, screaming, kicking, biting, scratching, and pulling his hair. The fact that he was protecting himself and not hitting back only seemed to further enrage her. Took three other guys to pull her off. Their difference in size was usually endearing. But under the circumstances, it was rather perverse.

asmonet's avatar

@tonedef: I have never heard of anything with ‘uppity’ in it…mind elaborating? Maybe I grew up in a tolerant bubble on that one. But that comment is confusing me.

funkdaddy's avatar

Uppity was the “well spoken” of it’s day… basically it implied someone didn’t know their place and were trying to advance themselves.. the nerve of some people

tiffyandthewall's avatar

i’m not pro-wife beater or anything, but i don’t really understand why we only penalize men for violence against women, but women’s violence against men is usually more-or-less ignored. obviously difference in strength (or assumed strength anyway) has something to do with it, but you know.

asmonet's avatar

Oh, I’d never heard of that funkdaddy, thank you for explaining. :)

MacBean's avatar

@asmonet --

@tiffy—We don’t only penalize men. The problem is that that’s more prevalent so you hear about it more often. You also hear about it more often because a lot of men who are abused are too ashamed to admit it and ask for help because of the perception that they are weak if they “let” a woman beat them or whatever. But I assure you, if a man accuses a woman of violence, it’s taken every bit as seriously. Even if he’s making shit up. My sister’s husband has gotten her in trouble because he hurt himself when he lunged at her and she sidestepped out of his way.

asmonet's avatar

@mac: thanks!!

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