Meta Question

Benny's avatar

Do you get the feeling that we're not wanted here?

Asked by Benny (917points) March 24th, 2009

It’s no problem. I just joined—I can leave. It would be a shame, as this seems like a fun place.

http://www.fluther.com/disc/38887/what-song-would-you-pick-to-ease-the-tension-between-the/

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

158 Answers

EmpressPixie's avatar

This was a pretty welcoming thread.

This question is basically a duplicate.

marinelife's avatar

I think you and everyone from wis.dm are wanted and welcome here. The thing is that if you come here, you need to accept that this is not wis.dm. It doesn’t work the same way.

Be patient. It is going to take some getting used to.

I’d love to hear something about you.

I love dogs. I love all animals, really, but especially dogs. I am a writer.

Your turn, @Benny.

The_unconservative_one's avatar

I have gotten a little hostility from a couple of people, but I’m not worried about them. There are people who will be buttholes wherever you go.

Kelly27's avatar

Many users have been very welcoming, some are downright hostile and rude. Roughdays was here for about 5 minutes and on his first question was called and idiot and told that he did not fit in here and should leave or be forced to leave.

FGS's avatar

@marina Patience works in both directions.

Aethelwine's avatar

We are a friendly bunch. You are all very welcome here.

I’m a stay-at-home mom, I love photography, I like to fish and I have 2 blue heelers and two kittens. Welcome! :D

mattbrowne's avatar

No, Benny, I think we are wanted here. I’ve observed a lot of warm welcome comments. I like the moderation idea, but maybe in some cases it’s really going a bit far. Here’s a recent example:

What is your favourite car?
I have a 1968 VW camper, but my favourite car is the Audi R8.

I think it’s a good question but it seems to violate the rules. There was this response:

I’m sorry my friend @allen_o, but this type of question is generally not permitted here. This question is an attempt to connect with people, as opposed to an attempt to figure something out. I just wanted to let you know in advance in case it was going to be moderated.

This will generate a lot of emotions…

Qingu's avatar

It really is fascinating how much online community interactions parallel real-world ones. This whole wis.dm thing reminds me of how Muslim immigrants to Europe struggle with integrating into the existent culture there while maintaining their own identity.

EmpressPixie's avatar

@Kelly27: Has that not been modded yet? I really thought it would have been.

About me: contrary to popular belief, my avatar is not black and white. The background has lavender, not white, in it.

evelyns_pet_zebra's avatar

Don’t let the hostile assholes ruin your view of fluther. they have to be in the minority. In fact, point them out and we’ll have them drawn and quartered at Noon in the village square.

Well, maybe not. Just ignore the assholes, that’s what I do.

eponymoushipster's avatar

see – this is why we need to have a sexy party!

Benny's avatar

@Marina Thanks. I’m not particularly feeling unwelcome, but I’ve been reading other threads of discontent. It’s interesting I do feel like I’ve crashed a party and people need to adjust.

In terms of my pet interests, I’m more of a reptile kind of guy :-)

Kelly27's avatar

@EmpressPixie Yes the question is gone now, as is Roughdays.

Aethelwine's avatar

You can take any group of people and it will have an asshole or two. We just try to ignore them here.

wundayatta's avatar

Yeah, there are always a few nasty people here and there. Maybe you could give them the benefit of the doubt, thinking that perhaps they are a little overwhelmed by the influx of people, and concerned about whether fluther culture will be able to survive so many new people who bring their own culture.

THis is very much like an onslaught of refugees. WHen communities get all these new people at once, most will welcome, and some will be defensive or afraid.

I welcome you and your energy and your culture, and I think it’s going to be a lot of fun working ourselves into a mutully created culture.

wundayatta's avatar

Another thing you should know, is that we flutherites also have problems with the moderation here. I have just returned from a major blow-out about that issue. You are not alone in questioning how this place is moderated. I believe, though, that fluther can take constructive criticism.

There ought to be a mission statement that explaines the goals behind these new guidelines and terms of service. That might help us all.

Jiminez's avatar

I just don’t see why questions have to be removed at all (none of mine have been BTW). I mean, c’mon. Don’t be a jerk. it’s just unnecessary. Relax. Let people have a good time.

EmpressPixie's avatar

@Kelly27: That’s a shame. The question was definitely going to be modded and when/if it came back Allen_O’s comment would have been deleted by Fluther moderators. It was way out of line.

mattbrowne's avatar

@Kelly27 – Very sad. I have not encounted a single rude Fluther user. Everyone is very friendly. I still need to understand the moderation rules, which might be a bit too strict at times.

mattbrowne's avatar

@Qingu – Wonderful analogy ;-)

bythebay's avatar

@Benny: I just posted this on another thread, it seems relevant here also:

“Your presence here is absolutely not resented in any way. Nor should you be judged by the actions of some disgruntled and whiny Flutherites or wis.dm-ers. We were all new here at some point.

There’s enough lurve to go around. Welcome!

Qingu's avatar

Was wis.dm basically anarchistic regarding moderation?

If so, perhaps the refugees complaining about “excessive moderation” here may want to consider whether lack of moderation actively led to their former home’s downfall.

mattbrowne's avatar

@evelyns_pet_zebra – Thanks for the good advice. So far everyone was very friendly. And I’ve encountered my share of idiots on wis.dm

FGS's avatar

@Qingu WIS.DM was designed to be moderated by the users as a community. Sometimes it worked quite effectively, sometimes not so much.

Kelly27's avatar

@EmpressPixie Roughdays may not spell perfectly and has some issues with grammar but he is a really great guy with some really good opinions and ideas. I just hated to see him attacked first thing and made to feel like he was not welcome and beneath the required standards. Hopefully he will be willing to try again and not judge you all by the words of a few.

mattbrowne's avatar

@daloon – Is this the greatest merger of two online forums in the history of the web? See my other question about mergers.

Kelly27's avatar

@mattbrowne I have not run into any direct rudeness or hostility just a feeling every now and again from a few members. Overall people have been nice. :)

The_unconservative_one's avatar

@Qingu , wis.dm was not moderated. I think that may have been a contributing factor to its downfall. Since coming to fluther, I have had a couple of negative experiences with a few members, but overwhelmingly, most people have been cool. One incident I had was this: I misspelled Nietzsche and OMG, you would have thought I kicked a puppy. One user attacked me and told me that they can’t take me seriously as a thinker if I misspelled that name….yadda yadda .” Well, wis.dm folks, you know me , I answered back saying something like, “If you are going to be anal about the misspelling of an uncommon name, then I can’t take you seriously.” Then another user read me the riot act for “attacking” the person who attacked me. UNBELIEVABLE.

mattbrowne's avatar

@Qingu – Yes, lack of moderation contributed to our former home’s downfall. New wis.dm users left very quickly for two reasons:

1) Personal attacks, trolling, spamming
2) Terribly slow servers

Only wis.dm veterans (including myself) stayed because the good part was so important to me that I endured the few idiots and the horrible performance of the servers.

Ivan's avatar

The lack of moderation was troublesome only in very small degrees. For the most part, the block feature solved all of the problems that moderator intervention would. The freedom of no moderation far made up for the mild inconveniences it provided.

The_unconservative_one's avatar

@Ivan I disagree totally. The block feature didn’t solve every problem because the offender just created dozens of new accounts to get around the block. Also, there was no penalty levied for any behavior other than bothering to complain. I was called nigger, sambo, boy and worse daily. Nothing done or said about it, but when I decided to email copies of these comments to the staff, then results came! They suspended ME for bothering to complain.

J0E's avatar

I think we deserved the welcome we got, we came in here and made a lot of noise. Eventually some will fit in and others won’t come any more, it all evens out in the end.

Harp's avatar

From what I’ve seen, the regulars here aren’t passing judgment on wis.dm-ers as a group at all. Just because some individuals have raised hackles here doesn’t say anything about how we view all of you. I think you see yourselves as a group more than we do. We just see some people we love and a few people who are a pain.

mattbrowne's avatar

@Harp – You are absolutely right. The wis.dm community was very strong indeed. Yes, it was a group and not a collection of individuals and now there are a lot of emotions and there’s sadness and mourning. I miss wis.dm too, but I feel grateful for the warm welcome here on Fluther. There isn’t a sigle internet forum with, say more than 500 user totally free of idiots. I like the moderation approach, although I need to understand some aspects of it a little better.

OpryLeigh's avatar

I only joined today and so far I have experienced nothing but warm welcomes :)

Dog's avatar

Seeing this thread posted today saddened me greatly.

Myself and dozens of Flutherites are very happy with
the influx of brilliant minds this last week.

As is human nature I am
seeing some petty skirmishes and these are coming from both sides.

In my view we are all now flutherites. I welcome you all and am very much enjoying the new contributions

So – to Flutherites both old and new. Let’s stop with “us” and
“them” because it is now just US.

eponymoushipster's avatar

WON’T SOMEBODY PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN?!

FGS's avatar

@Dog Well said.

Benny's avatar

@Dog I agree, thanks.

Kelly27's avatar

@Dog Well said :)

mattbrowne's avatar

@Dog: I am a Flutherite, repeat, I am a Flutherite. Gee, that wasn’t so hard…

Kelly27's avatar

@mattbrowne Geez, I am not sure I can make that leap yet. ;)

mattbrowne's avatar

@Kelly27 – Take your time. I need the time as well. The “I am a Flutherite” was more like what I’d like to feel in a couple of weeks. But Dog is right, we should eventually quit using “us wis.dm-ers”, see my new question.

Kelly27's avatar

@mattbrowne I hear ya. :) I will go check out the new question.

Dutchess12's avatar

No Benny…..it just depends really on who you meet first. I mean, on wis.dm we had concerns about newbies’ first contact being with (insert name)—and boy, that would be the end for that newbie! They’d never come back!

Dutchess12's avatar

@mattbrowne—oh, we will Matt….just need some grieving time, you know.

J0E's avatar

@mattbrowne No matter how hard we try we will always think of each other as wis.dmers, it is a bond we share.

Dog's avatar

@J0E
Nobody expects you to cast off history. We all respect your loss at what you are being forced to leave behind.

I have been part of communities that I am proud of and still appreciate all the good in my life that came from being a part of them. They are part of who I am today and were a part of my past that I will always remember fondly.

Without taking anything from your past we want to embrace you, when you are ready, to be a member of the Fluther community.

essieness's avatar

shakes head and walks off…

VzzBzz's avatar

No, as far as my own dabbles in here, all have very welcoming. They told me the chatroom button that used to be a top the page was to help us newbies. That’s pretty damned accommodating and welcoming.

marinelife's avatar

@Kelly27 “Roughdays was here for about 5 minutes and on his first question was called and idiot and told that he did not fit in here and should leave or be forced to leave.”

Can you provide a link to that thread?

Benny's avatar

@EmpressPixie “This question is basically a duplicate.” Fair enough, sorry. I haven’t figured out the search function well enough yet and I’m still working on the rules and conventions of the site.

EmpressPixie's avatar

@Benny: Depending on what you remember about the question the search is iffy sometimes anyway. It’s waaaay better now than it used to be though. They were just both on the front page and ultimately got startling different responses.

Kelly27's avatar

@Marina Actually I can’t, the question was removed. Is it possible to find a question once it has been gotten to by the moderators?

EmpressPixie's avatar

@Kelly27: No. Old links to it just inform you that it is in moderation until it comes out again—if it does.

Benny's avatar

@EmpressPixie Interesting. I haven’t found anybody particularly hostile at all. In fact, at times, wis was FAR more hostile than this site mostly because it wasn’t moderated. I know several people who left because it got too nasty. I’ve found people to be fine, here, but like I said somewhere above it does feel like I’ve crashed a party. It’s really an interesting feeling actually.

Benny's avatar

@essieness “shakes head and walks off…” Could you perhaps please tell me why you have this response to this question and I can know better next time?

essieness's avatar

@Benny It’s more in response to the whole debacle going on between the wis.dmrs and the jellies. So much fighting and complaining… I didn’t mean it to be directed toward you at all. I feel as though this discussion just keeps going and going and going with no end in sight. I’m just ready for it to settle down is all. Sorry for the confusion!

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

I think we’re welcome here, but we must remember the site doesn’t have to adjust to us, we must adjust to it if we want and if not, we can leave

Benny's avatar

@essieness Oh, I wasn’t trying to fight and complain. I’m sorry that it seemed that way. I’m actually thoroughly enjoying myself here.

EmpressPixie's avatar

@Marina: Just for information, the question Kelly27 was referring to was something about the war in Iraq and the first response was simply “idiot.” Beyond that I can’t say how it went, but literally and verbatim the first response was “idiot”. Not exactly a warm Fluther welcome.

bythebay's avatar

@Simone_De_Beauvoir: But we hope you’ll feel at home and stay.

Benny's avatar

@EmpressPixie Any idea why the person who responded “idiot” responded like that? And just FYI, I’ve been called far worse on Wis when I didn’t agree with someone.

essieness's avatar

@Benny Oh hunnie, I know you weren’t trying to fight and complain, I’m referring to other threads…

Benny's avatar

@essieness Good enough then! I’m going to try to make the rest of my comment small like yours

EmpressPixie's avatar

@Benny: They did not agree with the sentiment expressed in the question.

Kelly27's avatar

Trying to figure out how to whisper ;)

Benny's avatar

@EmpressPixie Is that kind of response normal? Certainly people can ask loaded questions that may have logical fallicies behind them. I always found that it was a lot more effective to challenge the question or the assumption rather than name calling.

EmpressPixie's avatar

Nope! It was totally bizarre. If I had not seen the question, I might have thought Kelly27 was exaggerating to make a point. Which is why I put the information out there. It was very much outside our norms.

Benny's avatar

@EmpressPixie Well, I’ve known Kelly on wis for a year. Her thoughts and views aren’t in lockstep with a lot of other people, but I’ve never known her to be anything but civil and kind to those she may disagree with.

Harp's avatar

Just so you guys know, you should totally feel free to flag a comment like that for attention by the mods. Just click the “flag as…” link below the comment.

Benny's avatar

@harp Thanks. There was a thing like that on wis but it was always ignored.

Benny's avatar

going to sign off now and get some lunch but I’ll catch up with this thread later

EmpressPixie's avatar

@Benny: Ah, but here the mods will totally take care of it. (Which is to say remove the hateful comment.) Also, just to make clear (I’m worried by your most recent comment) it was NOT Kelly who said that. It was another Fluther member.

Kelly27's avatar

@Benny Are my thoughts and opinions that far from the norm? ;)

VzzBzz's avatar

@Harp This is true, the flagging here really does work and the moderators pay attention and nip things in the bud. I’ve seen several troll comments get deleted whereas on wis.dm, nothing much was ever done until way- way- way too late and even then, it wasn’t much.

marinelife's avatar

@EmpressPixie Thanks for the clarification.

@Benny No. Personal attacks are against the guidelines. That should not have happened. I apologize for that user.

I can tell you that I was called anal yesterday and Flutherites were referred to as “psuedo-intellectual snobs,” as well as the Nazi references discussed earlier.

Harp's avatar

@VzzBzz Yeah, they’ve got a tough and often thankless job, but their work really helps keep things civil. To newcomers, they may seem like shadowy overlords, but they’re users like the rest of us, and as you get to know them, you’ll love ‘em.

Dutchess12's avatar

@Harp I can adapt to all of this…in fact, it reminds of the original wis.dm in the old days…but….I find the restrictions on the number of questions I can ask is very uncomfortable….You know, something will happen and a q will pop up in my head—but I can’t do anything with it. I understand the restriction totally…I mean, we had some wis.dmrs who would post nonsensical question after question just to gain points and I never did that (didn’t care about points)....but I think I can only ask 4 a day. I don’t like that at all…..

Harp's avatar

@DutchCat Wow, can’t relate…I only ask one every couple of weeks!

dearest_prudence's avatar

@eponymoushipster – I’m all for the sexy party thing

Allie's avatar

I for one am glad to see you here. It was rough at first, not going to lie, but I’ve gotten used to and very much like a lot of you. (I’m even warming up to you, @J0E ;]) I hope most of you decide to stay.

J0E's avatar

@Allie I might be warming up to you too

Ivan's avatar

Get a room boys

Dutchess12's avatar

@Allie— I’m liking a lot of you too! The only real problem I have is being so restricted on the number of questions you can ask a day…I mean, things happen throughout the day that…if I don’t share it now I’ll probably never get around to it. Like…a minute ago I saw a really vicious dog almost come over the fence at a group of kids that were poking sticks at ‘em! (I hollered at the kids) I went to wis.dm to post the question (Would you ever holler at kids you don’t even know) because I can’t ask it here—I hit my limit a long time ago! I fully appreciate the restriction, I really do. In fact, I wish wis.dm had some sort of restriction like that, but is it at all possible to up the limit from, what…5 to maybe 15 or something?
Oh, and the other problem I have is…I start a new job tomorrow, so nobody will be seeing much of me any more. sniff Whoops! wrong code. sniff ~sniff~
<sniff> +bleh+

marinelife's avatar

@DutchCat The limit is three in a twenty-four hour period. I write mine down so I won’t forget.

J0E's avatar

@Ivan I don’t get it

Ivan's avatar

You said you were warming up to each other. Never mind, it was dumb.

bythebay's avatar

@Simone_De_Beauvoir: Wonderful; in your honor…a cannonball!
Everybody into the pool!

mattbrowne's avatar

@Marina – I was able to ask more than 3 questions today. Funny.

Benny's avatar

@mattbrowne And I was blocked from asking questions this morning, but I can do it now if I want to.

I’m regretting asking my question now the way I did. I did it to be provocotive, but in reading it again I can see how it could be confrontational.

Ivan's avatar

The question is worded just fine Benny.

Allie's avatar

@Ivan Heh, I’m not a boy. =\

Benny's avatar

@Marina “I’d love to hear somthing about you”

I have more time now, so let me see.
I’m afraid of dogs—stemming from an incident as a child. I tolerate them, and I’m around them a lot, but I’ll never own them. We have a cat, but I’m allergic to it so I pretty much stay away from it.

I’m a an amateur astronomer, a bluegrass banjo and ukulele player, and I brew beer.

I am a physician, so I’ll occasionally answer medical questions, but I generally don’t like to as I come online to get away from my job.

My daughter is the best daughter ever.

I love any melodic music from Led Zeppelin to Dream Theatre, to Arvo Part, to Miles Davis.

I have compensated ADD and despite that I manage to get my work done ahead of time.

I always tell the truth. I never tell a lie.

Dutchess12's avatar

@Marina—He brews beer in his BATHTUB. As a doctor he has diagnosed me as “totally nuts.” which isn’t very nice! And he did too lie…I am not insane! wait…the voices in my head….QUIT ARGUING YOU STUPID VOICES!! YOU’RE ALL WRONG!!

Benny's avatar

@DutchCat I do not. I brew beer in my garage. If I brewed beer in my bathtub the fire alarms would go off.

Dutchess12's avatar

@Benny LOL! So where do you keep you cars? In the bathroom?

dearest_prudence's avatar

@DutchCat & @Benny you guys are a kick!!!!
wish grog would join
sigh

Benny's avatar

@DutchCat Actually, it’s an issue. We are able to keep one car in the garage because I have all my telescope crap and gardening stuff on the side that takes up a lot of room. We move the car out, obviously, but the problem with brewing beer, eating pizza and drinking beer (because one absolutely MUST drink beer while brewing it) is spills. And beer wort tends to be very VERY sticky. So I have to hose the garage down, being careful to avoid getting anything important wet, after the brewing session. If it’s a nice sunny day, we’ll do it outside on the driveway—actually preferred because to brew beer you need a big propane cooker.

Ivan's avatar

@Allie Ha! Carry on then.

Dutchess12's avatar

@Benny So glad you’re here!!!

Benny's avatar

@DutchCat Yet another example of your insanity.

Dutchess12's avatar

Yep to that, man! Gimme some beer!

Dog's avatar

@Benny I like any dude who plays banjo and brews beer while drinking it! Bummer about the dog thing. Good thing I am not really a dog

I play fiddle a bit and Gutair well. I am very good at drinking beer.

Benny's avatar

@Dog The fear of dogs isn’t that big of a deal—It’s just an interesting quirk. Like I said, I’m around them all the time and I don’t run screaming or anything. I was a kid and a big German Shepherd ran up to me and knocked me over. Ever since then it’s been a very mild nervousness around them which I just deal with. I’ve seen people afraid of snakes or spiders who have a much more violent and vocal reaction than I have with dogs. My brother in law has two dogs and I’m over at his house all the time, and I play catch with his retriever.

I’m more of a beer geek than I am a beer drinker. I actually don’t drink that much and ironically enough I’m a little allergic to the yeast in beer! But last night I opened a bottle of homebrewed 2004 barlewine that was exquisite. In fact, maybe I’ll brew that again when we brew next week…hmm…

In terms of the banjo and ukulele playing, my regular avatar is one of me on stage. I just have the Cal Oski up while the women are still in the basketball tournament.

marinelife's avatar

@Benny Thanks, pleased to meet you. I like astronomy a lot, but am not of astronomer caliber. I loved going to the roof of the Hyatt hotel on Maui and watching through their telescope. They even have a staff astronomer. Have you seen this place? I would like to vacation there sometime.

One final question: “totally nuts” Is that a technical medical term? ; )

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@Benny
please stick around
people here are great

Benny's avatar

@Simone_De_Beauvoir Oh, I don’t plan on going anywhere—I actually really like it here. I just kind of feel like a crashed a party—sort of like there was a big party going on, and all of a sudden a bunch of new, unfamiliar faces showed up and everybody is a little uncomfortable. Cris and I may even talk Cirbryn into joining the fold again.

Benny's avatar

@Marina No, but I’ve heard of it. There are also places where you can rent scopes online and take your own pictures via web control. It’s pretty neat.

In terms of “totally nuts” no, that just applies to DutchCat.

wundayatta's avatar

I try to ask about three questions a day. Some days I could ask more, if there weren’t the limit. There’s a fairly simple formula to follow to have your questions be unmoderated. I got used to never being moderated, so when I was, over what I thought was a perfectly appropriate question, I got overheated about it.

It should be a question about something you are curious about or interested in. It should be written as a question, using a full sentence. No “french fries in Paris? kinds of things. what the hell do you want to know about french fries in Paris?

Then, the details. I like to fill out my questions more, because I want to know a whole lot. Most people don’t answer more than one of my subquestions, if that. Some are totally annoyed that I ask so many questions at once. But I figure I’m providing folks different ways to get at the topic. Plus, I’m really curious.

Other times, if my question is asking about experience, I might tell my own story about the experience, hopefully as a model for what I’m looking for. It doesn’t work all that often, but things do seem to be looking up for me, question-and-answer-wise.

As far as inspiration goes, it’s everywhere, if you learn how to look at things. How often do you clean your desk? Do you have to have a clean surface or you can’t work? Are there times when you are organized and times when you are a mess? What might explain the changes? (Can you tell I cleaned my desk today?) I just look around: indoor plants, bookshelves, artwork, posters, pictures of old friends, etc etc. They could all be turned into questions with only a modicum of contemplation.

crisw's avatar

I’ve had zero problems here so far. But then I already have an idea of how to behave myself on a community moderated site :>)

Benny's avatar

@crisw Oh, I haven’t either, except once I got admonished that a post should actually be a PM. The thing is I had no idea how to do a PM at that time.

crisw's avatar

@Benny
Yeah, I just figured that out now when I sent you one. This response should probably be a PM :>D

The_unconservative_one's avatar

@crisw I had a person here tell me that she couldn’t take me seriously as a thinker because I spelled Nietzsche wrong. Well, you know me, I don’t take shit off people, so I replied that if you are going to be so anal about the spelling of an uncommon name, then I can’t take you seriously as a person. Well you would have thought I kicked a puppy! Another user read me the riot act about “making personal attacks” all the while ignoring the attack on me.

Benny's avatar

@The_unconservative_one Yes, I saw you post about this comment on another thread. Don’t let it get under your skin. It’s not that big of a deal.

crisw's avatar

@The_unconservative_one
There will be jerks and persnickety folks anywhere. At least this site appears to actually deal with the jerks. The one wis.dm troll who defiled the site for months lasted what- several hours?- before getting booted out of here.

The other stuff can roll of your back. I think it may be worth it to get some spelling criticism in return for not being harassed :>)

The_unconservative_one's avatar

@Benny Yeah, I know you are right. It just pisses me…(chanting) Serenity now, serenity now…Okay, I’m cool :-)

The_unconservative_one's avatar

@crisw I wasn’t aware he got booted from here. That’s great

crisw's avatar

@The_unconservative_one
Yeah, deep breaths…deep breaths….think about blue skies and puppies…it’s all right now, you can put that machete down… :>)

The_unconservative_one's avatar

@crisw Hahaha, thanks. I needed that laugh.

wundayatta's avatar

@The_unconservative_one: there are quite a few spelling fanatics here. Sometimes I tease them by deliberately mispelling things. However, I think they know the gig, since they don’t bother correcting me. Once they get to know that you know how to spell, in general, they’ll back off.

Periodically, we’ll have a question about the value or not of having a conventional spelling system. As you might gather, I’m in favor of creative spelling, despite the fact I almost never do it. My point is that communication—even if it is uncertain—is better than no communication. Oh, oh, oh, and I have a new reson. It also shows the character of the writer, which wouldn’t come through if you spelled everything all corect.

my misspellings usually have to do with typos, as much as anything else

The_unconservative_one's avatar

@daloon I know a really great guy who was frightened away from this site because he doesn’t spell well and his grammar needs some work. He posted one question and was attacked. He was called an idiot among other things. He deleted his account. Fluther missed out on knowing a great guy, because some asses felt that they were better than him because he spelled a few words incorrectly.

The_unconservative_one's avatar

@Benny Wow, I didn’t know you played banjo and brewed beer! Those are both great hobbies. I plan to get into homebrewing myself.

crisw's avatar

@The_unconservative_one
To play devil’s advocate, the same fellow has had it suggested to him many times that he should use a spell checker, yet he refuses to do so. In such a forum, you need to, at least, meet people halfway.

As you mentioned on the Boy Scout issue, the Scouts have a right to set their admission policies. So does a site like this. If its owners call for the use of at least minimally coherent spelling and grammar, that is their prerogative. Frankly, I welcome it.

The_unconservative_one's avatar

@crisw Are you suggesting he should have typed his comments into a word processor first, then cut and paste? or use the built in firefox spell checker?

Dog's avatar

I use spell check before posting. While it does not prevent all errors it makes sure I am within reason.

Kelly27's avatar

@crisw I was thinking about this yesterday and it made me think that even if someone uses spell check it only tells them the word is spelled wrong, it does not tell them the correct spelling. I do believe he tried, Cris, and his treatment upon coming here made me truly feel bad for him.

The_unconservative_one's avatar

@Kelly27 Also, he has grammar problems. Is this site only for those who are good writers? Are we more interested in what you say, or how you say it ?

Kelly27's avatar

@The_unconservative_one Yes he did and if one was able to look past that he was a really great guy.

elijah's avatar

I agree that picking on someone for a spelling mistake or improper punctuation is a bit over the top, I make these sort mistakes myself.
The difference lies in that I make every effort to try and do it properly.
I did not see your friends post. I do not know the extent of his mistakes, but if you know you’re doing it wrong and don’t even try to fix it, then why should people be understanding? He shouldn’t of been called an idiot though. That was uncalled for.

Harp's avatar

There are standards about grammar and spelling for questions especially, but all that happens is that the questioner is asked to rework the Q before reposting it. The mods will happily work with the asker to get the Q presentable. That hardly seems onerous.

There are a few people here who jump on grammar and spelling mistakes. That’s not this site’s policy, it’s their own policy. There are plenty of other people, me included, who keep urging the sticklers to back off a little. It’s a tug of war that will probably go on forever, because that’s just how people are.

I happen to be a lousy speller. If it weren’t for Firefox’s help, I don’t know what language
I’d be writing in. If I can’t guess how to correct a word, I google it. It’s a bit of extra work, yes, but I’m willing to do it out of consideration for everyone else. It’s one of those “meet me half-way” things.

mattbrowne's avatar

@Benny – Glad to hear that!

Dutchess12's avatar

@Kelly27
@crisw
@theconservative one

I’m trying to pave the way for roughdays to to try again…..I posted a Q here and…maybe we could…circle the wagons for him in the beginning? He’s just a neat guy.

DeanV's avatar

I see no reason that wis.dmers are not wanted here, as long as they do more than bitch about wis.dm closing down. That’s really the only thing i’ve found irritating so far. If you don’t like it here, you can leave, and if you feel persecuted, you can contact the mods.

Benny's avatar

@dverhey Give it some time. The wis community was relatively small and pretty tight, and people are just going through a grieving process. Personally, I like it here better because of the mods.

crisw's avatar

@benny
“Personally, I like it here better because of the mods.” -yeppers.

Aethelwine's avatar

@Benny
@crisw
The two of you are fitting in just fine. Come join our zombie hunt.

mattbrowne's avatar

@dverhey – Yes, I can understand that this is irritating to the existing Fluther user base. But people have emotions and it’s not a good idea to bottle them up. But expressing the feelings has to be done in a polite and non-arrogant way. From what I’ve seen most wis.dm-ers stick to that.

jo_with_no_space's avatar

@Qingu Yes, wis.dm was pretty much entirely unmoderated, and believe me when I say that caused a fair whack of problems for the site. We got, at one point, inundated with trolls and spammers and at times things all got a bit nasty and name-calling ensued. It was a sorry sight to see, for sure. There was also an ongoing debate between members whether team wis.dm’s input should be more active. They tended to take the point of view, right or wrong, that they felt like babysitters watching over a load of kids, and refrained from intervening except in the most extreme cicumstances. And I don’t necessarily know what would have been the best way.

mattbrowne's avatar

@jo_with_no_space – There’s always a trade off, but all things considered I prefer the Fluther approach – Still I’ve had a wonderful time on wis.dm over the past 18 months. Great people and most them are starting to come over here.

jo_with_no_space's avatar

@mattbrowne Indeed, it’s always a difficult balance. I love that we’ve mostly migrated over here successfully.

The_unconservative_one's avatar

I prefer fluther to wis.dm immensely, because of the mods. I actually sort of hated wis.dm. I only stayed around because there were more good people there than problematic ones. When wis.dm started asking for donations, I was floored. I felt like there was no way I would ever give one dime to them.

NinaBeena's avatar

@The_unconservative_one I totally agree about the donation thing. Will Koffell pissed me off one too many times for me to feel generous. Being yelled at for a legitimate complaint was arrogant and just further proof of his asshattery.

Anyhow, I don’t know if I like it here yet. I’ll decide after I see the way flutherites interact with each other.

mattbrowne's avatar

@NinaBeena – I had my share of PM exchanges with Will. He’s a smart guy, but very stubborn. Sometimes less is more. See my new Fluther question.

Benny's avatar

@jonsblond That is a hilarious thread!

DeanV's avatar

Yeah. I didn’t really want to seem rude there, i just think that the more people that are here, but don’t want to be, the worse fluther will become. And nobody wants that.

Jeruba's avatar

I was greeted rudely upon arrival too, and I was not a part of any group. But there was also instant warmth. Later on I learned a lot more about all those I encountered at first. The main thing is just to take a little time and settle down.

Everybody has many roles in life. I don’t expect to have the same relationships at work as I have at home or to interact the same way as a member of club A or B as I do as a member of my alumni group. You can be a “wis.dmer” as long as you like to think so. But the moment you signed up here, you became a flutherite—not instead but too.

dearest_prudence's avatar

@Jeruba thank you for that unique perspective, I appreciate it much:)

mattbrowne's avatar

@Jeruba – Yes, when we signed up here, we became flutherites (with wis.dm roots).

Jeruba's avatar

Exactly, @mattbrowne. See it as a melting pot…

Benny's avatar

@Jeruba Yes. I’m enjoying myself a lot here. This is a great site—I’m just bummed I didn’t know about it before.

mattbrowne's avatar

Melting pots are a powerful source of inspiration!

Dog's avatar

Yes! We are a melting pot!
We are SuperFluther!

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