How to change way of thinking?

First he should write out his negative thoughts (most negative thoughts are repetitive).

Most of them are also untrue. He should write that the thought is not true. Then he should write a positive thought.

For example, suppose he thinks he is stupid. He should write the down, then write why he is average intelligence (or smart or whatever). Then craft a positive. That needs to not use the word not. So, he should not write, “I am not stupid.” but something like: “I have the brains to do whatever I need to do.”

Each time he catches himself thinking the negative thoughts, he must stop himself. He must replace the thought with the positive thought. If possible, he shuld say it out loud.

This will feel awkward at first. He has to persevere.

Good luck to him.

Take antidepressants and run for 40 minutes every day. Learn boxing and let someone punch you in the face every day. Then start doing volunteer work for immigrants who are poor and can’t speak English. Help out at a soup kitchen or homeless shelter. Give away any money you don’t absolutely need to survive. Say something nice to someone every day. Go out of your way to help people and really inconvenience yourself. Focus on other people’s happiness and stop worrying about your own petty concerns. Think about the fact that in a few short years you may be dead for the rest of eternity.

Slap your friend in the face. Figuratively speaking.
(Who am I kidding? Really, slap your friend)

Tell your friend, you do not hang out with negative people. To grow up, and understand life sucks and then you die. Get over it, take a number, and get on with living.

Maybe you could suggest to your ftiend to try some visual meditations? This could really help with changing his outlook on his life. Also, maybe he could make a list of all the things he’s grateful for in his life, from the very basic to the wonderful.

In AA they tell you to act yourself into a way of thinking.

Most try to think themselves into a way of acting, it’s a lot harder that way.

Does he want to change, or is this you thinking he should change? If he wants to change, why does he want to change?

There are people for whom this kind of change is impossible. It’s best not to try. Instead you learn not to pay much attention to those kinds of thoughts. They aren’t you. They are just chatter in your mind. Forget about it, and do something else.