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Jude's avatar

The death of a loved one (family member or friend), did it change you at all (a permanent change)

Asked by Jude (32098points) March 30th, 2010

How you dealt with things/the way that you looked at life?

Did you lose a bit of yourself?

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20 Answers

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

No.I miss them but it made me stronger.
Life is too short,that’s for sure.Try to live it to it’s fullest because you never know what can take you out.

Jude's avatar

@lucillelucillelucille it made me stronger, as well.

Pandora's avatar

When I lost my father I lost my joy for Christmas. It was his favorite season and I never felt the same about it since he wasn’t there to share his joy with me.
It taught me to remember to tell those I love how much they mean to me, just incase one day my number is up. He always made me feel loved, but I wish I would’ve told him one last time before he passed away.

Just_Justine's avatar

I lost my dad, then after a long while I lost my mom and in the same week a good friend. I felt sad of course but it has not changed me. I accept death is a part of life. I think people like “things” simply change form.

DrasticDreamer's avatar

Yes, and yes. It feels like I lost a part of myself when Tigh died, but maybe I gained something from it. My perspective shifted, a lot, about life in general.

meagan's avatar

I think the death of my grandmother when I was twelve kind of took away part of my innocence. I never fully recovered from that. Especially the way my family explained it to me and treated the entire situation.
I can’t attend funerals anymore of how unraveled I get.

jazmina88's avatar

Yes, when my aunt and uncle died, I lost the folks in the family who actually practiced love. Now it is total dysfunction. and I have nobody to talk sensibly with.

WestRiverrat's avatar

My Brother died 2 days before my birthday, 15 years ago. Since then I have hated birthdays and holidays. It is ironic, since I play Santa nearly every year.

filmfann's avatar

When my father died (I was 27), I suddenly felt the need to be more responsable.
Up to that point, I had been pretty silly and aloof.
Within a year, I was married.

YARNLADY's avatar

I’m sorry for your loss. I lost two husbands with 10 years, and over time, my parents, grandparents, various aunts and uncles, and most recently my father-in-law. Yes, it has taught me to me more interested on fending for myself, since others can’t fill that role all the time, and not to count on expectations.

IBERnineD's avatar

I actually had a friend die recently, randomly actually. As far as I knew he was perfectly fine, and then I get a call from my father saying he died of spine cancer, which I didn’t even know he was diagnosed with. He went to the doctors with some back pain and died the same day. It spun me into a viewpoint where I took a step back. I looked at how I was living, what I was doing, and who I was surrounding myself with. It made me think what exactly was I working so hard for. It made me question relationships, time I had wasted, and any regrets I had. And to be honest I’m still reeling from it, mostly internally. It spun me into a serious quarter life crisis, and as other issues began to reveal themselves, the plans I had made for myself seemed trite. Right now I am not in a good place, but I feel like I need this insanity to consume me. Even though it may severely ruin my college career and any relationship with one of my sisters. Luckily I am pretty good at faking being alright.

thriftymaid's avatar

My life is forever changed as my loved one is no longer here part of my life.

ducky_dnl's avatar

My friend passed away and I still feel empty. I can never feel my heartbeat, but I know it’s there. My way has changed a lot. I used to be so preppy, but now I am just a walking corpse. Whenever I see people I just think to myself: Why couldn’t it have been you? I cry almost every day. :(

cazzie's avatar

Absolutely, I feel changed by the death of my parents. My mom died 8 years ago and my father died almost two years ago. I feel much more alone and it left me with the feeling that there is no one in my corner now but me, so I think I’m much more feisty and less likely to take shit from anyone.

Sophief's avatar

When I lost my Grandma, I lost part of myself. We were so very close, and she was such an amazing woman. That was 10 years ago, and I still think about her often.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

While growing up, so many people died that I didn’t look at it much aside from, “oh, that’s life” but as an adult when young friends died then it was a shocker how emotional I got. I did see my own life with more appreciation while examing the good that was in others and how I was a part of theirs. As far as being changed forever, only when a grandparent died because they were like a parent to me and also best friend. There was a feeling of connectivity lost, kind of like being used to the sound of a power line and then suddenly it’s gone.

curlyz's avatar

It made me to appreciate my life. I’m trying to enjoy every second of it.
And, of course with each death in the family, I had lost little pieces of me. Nothing can change that.

Aster's avatar

It made me want to say, “I love you” often. I had never said that before. I feel closer to people now with the exception of the neighbors. lol

Inspired_2write's avatar

I did not lose.
I gained in understanding and sympathy for others.
I learned from my late mothers example that a simple “hello” acknowledging others goes a long way in assisting there development.
Even in present day, homeless people desperately need this acknowledgement that they are human and not ignored.
So many people walking on the street treat unfortunates as if they do not exist?
Who knows one day we may be in there perdicament too?
Say Hi and acknowledge them as you pass them…if even that small gesture is all that you can muster.

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