I have an idea for another game. It's called the Backwards Thread. It's not as easy as it looks. Read the details carefully if you want to try it.

So they all lived happily ever after. The End.

There was only one thing left to find. The key has been in their family for generations but neither sister ever laid hands on it – this time it was going to happen, no matter what as not only they found the box with the key in it but also the door to unlock. And they did.

They had already been to the mountain, discovered the secret fountain and found the clue hidden at its base. They now had to return to the mysterious mansion and search for the last thing.

Dick collapsed, the trials & tribulations of a long & indeed exsaspirating day had certainly taken it’s toll. “Chin up” said Fanny almost resigned to her fate. “We must carry on it’s almost dawn”

He finally had an erection, but when the doorbell rang, the

She was so tired of trying to help him get it up all night – that grumpy old man – and

The mind splittlingly loud techno music wasn’t doing her any good at all, she tried remembering what he had been saying to her earlier that morning, but it was all in vain. The shrill music constantly brought her back to the saddening reality that…

Fanny grew weary at the flaccid member which stared rather pathetically up at her,she was sure it blinked once or twice but alas this was a forlorn hope born of frustration.Twas a cool evening in viagra falls & she wasn’t about to give up on a night that promised so much but until now had delivered so little.A piercing sound cracked the stillness of the moment…

The club meeting began, but one annoying individual was as limp as fresh dough. People who were perched brightly upright on their

It was unusal to have so many members of the Viagra Falls S&M club to accept invitations for Tuesdays. Knowing to expect a crowd, they had been somewhat on edge the whole week, and when the day was finally upon them, he had at least assured her that the entire ordeal would all go well. “Here, ill load the stereo system with Atari teenage riot” he said as he set the stereo timer for 30 minutes, “if nothing else helps this always get’s me going, i have a thing for people screaming in my ear”.

Nestor opened the door to the club meeting room and put out the chairs, the couches, the beds, the ties and the whips he expected they would need.

After Heracles killed Neleus and all of Nestor’s siblings

While cleaning out the Augean stables, Heracles got fed up with dealing with horseshit and decided it was probably time to kill some people (mean are like that.) He looked around and saw Neleus and Nestor and his siblings. He knew that Nestor ran this great S&M club so he decided to let him live. Then….

Oh, look! Here comes @janbb to bog down the backwards thread!

(Bringing in Heracles was your idea, boyo, not mine. Oh – and “mean” was meant to be “men”; a Freudian slip)

So @dpworkin was back on Fluther after a short hiatus for more important things and on his first day back he said….

How did that joke start again?

Are we going backwards or forwards now? I’m getting fedredyt!

Uh-oh, I think @janbb is about to fuck up the Backwards Thread.

@dpworkin decided to sabotage his own game for some cheap shots so he said….

(this is in “social” not “general” isn’t it?)

this has so much potential lol

What did the electrician say about the capacitor, @Simone_De_Beauvoir?

and just then @dpworkin asked:

@chels was celebrating her engagement and her last day of college when @Simone_De_Beauvoir and @dpworkin came into the room.

And all was well. Everyone was drinking wine and champagne because

It was a wonderful day on Fluther. People were happily answering questions, playing stupid word games, celebrating Mother’s Day

The birds were singing

Who did “Hey Mr Tambourine Man”?

You can ask me anything, and I’ll know the answer. Go ahead, try me.

@bob_ seems to think he’s in a performance of “The 39 Steps”. Let’s listen in…

I hope everybody is enjoying the show. Don’t forget to tip your waitresses! Moving on, @dpworkin will tell us who our next performer is.

Could it be? It is! It’s Arthur Godfrey! I thought he was dead.

Dude, who’s that?

Dawg, you look just like Esther Winterwood.

Comment on my appearance.

Uh-oh, here comes Bossy.

Hey, did anybody hear some noise?

I hope no one heard that fart.

Those burritos did a number on me….

Why would anyone slaughter a herd of helpless little mules?

He looked around him at the destruction, and said to himself:

He thought getting a dog was a good idea, until he came home.

Typhon was excited about his son, Cerberus.

Before his lost his fight with Zeus and was banished below Mt. Etna for eternity…..

I used to love Mohammad Ali

Sugar Ray Robinson once confided in me;

Have you ever met anyone famous?

Other than me

I have a question..

And then Chels stood up and said:

Naked neath her scarlet blanket of desire she stopped, pondered for a moment…

He stopped. He got up. He left the room.

Had he taken leave of his senses, this poor delusional foolish boy, she was naked I tell you, naked!!! Alas,for reasons known only to himself…

He threw open the door and did a double take…

He raced from the office to his home.

His morbidly obese secretary Mary Hinge, stripped to her underwear beckoning him feverishly. Her chubby little pinky inserted into her bat cave whilst eating a bucket full of doritos.Extremely frightened & not a little disturbed by this horrific vista…

What happened to Locke on last night’s “Lost” episode?

Inquiring minds want to know:

How would you encapsulate Socrates’ teaching methods in five words?

The brilliant German Shepherd posed the question:

Helmut pondered to himself whilst rounding up his sheep, “what if”....

Daisy said to Belle, “Baa! Why is Helmut taking so long rounding us up? Whaaaaht do you think heee’sss doing?”

Let’s try to be quiet. @janbb is reading Thackeray to her grandchild.

An uneasy yet not altogether unwelcome silence descended over the thread.What could this mean?

“So Jake, I’d like to begin reading Trollope’s Barchester Towers today. Eleven months old is not too early to start the classics,” Bubby said.

In this suite, our researchers are studying the ways in which Jewish grandmothers induce early psychopathy in their grandchildren. Care to listen in?

Welcome to the the Institute of Fekachteh Psychoanalytic Theory. I think we might be able to join in on a tour that’s starting now.

Yo, what’s this place?

Almost unbelievably at that precise moment Mr.Stevie Wonder entered the building.Confused, he remarked…

The strains of the Muzak version of “Isn’t She Lovely?” were playing in the entrance hall.

He heard something but it was hard to make out the sounds until he realized it was

Wal mart was particularly busy that morning, he thought…

“Shit. I need some kitty litter” he said. So in his car he went, on a journey to the nearest open store.

His new pet cat had a full belly, and was looking for a place to do the doo-doo.

He awoke to the pungent smell of pussy, “good morning darling sleep well” he mistakenly exclaimed. Unfortunately for him & luckily for his wife the kitty was the culprit on this ocassion, yes…

Henry Miller, as usual, had been drinking. As Anais Nin tells us,

Although she had the reputation of being a narcissistic old bat, she did reveal interesting tidbits about her lovers – old and young.

Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl.

I had seen this woman before but I couldn’t figure out from where. Just then I remembered

Anyone else with you on Oceanic flight 815?

So, yeah, I’m leaving today.

Leaving on a jet plane? Don’t know when you’ll be back again?

I dropped of pdworkin at the airport and this is what he said to me as he left for Pakastan to go find al queda to discuss religion.

And now how about a subtle misuse of grammar and orthography?

@dpworkin was cleaning his house and packing his bags prior to his trip to Pakistan but he paused to exclaim:

With record 2 of his Elvis’s Greatest Hits box record set blasting on his stereo…

Without record 2 of his, your choice of prizes from the second shelf.

Not yet fully grasping the significance of this moment as the Carnie spoke those fateful life changing words…

The Gleason and the Carnie stood on the set of The Honeymooners

Nestor knew it really was time for him to leave the fairigrounds and get ready for the meeting but he still had to sell his wife.

We took @janbb’ s Thackeray, and replaced it with Folger’s Thomas Hardy crystals! Do you think she will notice?

Coming out of the Folger Library, @janbb saw a man and exclaimed, “Thomas, I hardy knew ye!”

Here comes @janbb. I hope she doesn’t get this thread stuck in the mud again.

Unbeknownst to her as she strolled through the front doors of the Folger library @janbb was being watched…

… and now, the exciting conclusion of “All Our Librarians”, brought to you by Flabby’s Milquetoast.

Flashing her sexy bosom at the surprised patrons, @janbb took off her glasses, let down her hair, turned directly to the television camera and announced….

Goddammit Roger!! You told me I would get a movie career by now! And you call yourself an agent??!! This is the last time I will do these 2 bit TV jobs now get out of here I have a commercial to do….

Roger Ebert had just stopped by the set to talk to his client. He was astounded when she threw a glass of water in his face and yelled…

Do you think the backwards item will need a kick-start two days from now?

@dpworkin was looking to tell a wonderful story so he asked:

Sitting in his liars anonymous group therapy session…

Where did you meet Glen Beck?

Charlie Rose turned to Osama Bin Laden and asked him:

In the green room of the Larry King show

The guests were getting a little restless.Bin Laden appeared visibly shaken at the notion that Rose desired him sexually & wouldn’t mind playing out such a fantasy right there…

Someone had eaten all of the strawberries off the fruit plate. It was the third hour of the network delay for emergency coverage of the first nationwide lumber sports day, and…

This was the moment he had been waiting for as she knowingly smiled at him as she bit into the strawberry he held in his fingers not yet realizing

He had brought the tarp, the ropes, the knives, the pliers, the scalpels, the blindfold, she was beside him in the van,

As he drove the Ford Bronco deep in to the woods with her at his side, he quickly reviewed the procedure and the equipment he needed.

And now another episode of Dr. Bob, Frontier Proctologist. Brought to you by Anusoft Medicated Pads.

Since there was nothing else to do on Friday morning and she was tired of Fluthering, @janbb turned on the t.v.

After hanging up the phone with her bookie and

She had a habit of speaking to pamphlets on the wireless telephone.

Bored & evidently a little drawn by now, she decided to call her dear Belgian friend Pam Phlets…

After closing the front door after the last of her all night party guests who were helping her celebrate her Pampered Chef salesman of the year award, Janbb was

“Bye!” “See ya later!” “Nice party, @janbb !” “man, I can hardly walk!”

Let’s throw this fucker on out of here.

“Uh-oh!” he exclaimed, “Arthur Godfrey’s dead!”

While showing some B-list celebs some tricks with his revolver, he accidentally pulled the trigger.

Dr. Freud was trying to explain the meaning of dreams to his audience. As an example of one, he pulled out his gun,

How did Sigmund get busted for public exposure?

The haute monde in Vienna were all abuzz that morning -

“Haute monde” means “Bees” in the Austrian dialect.

In an attempt to show his pedagoguey and disdain for literary stylings, the recent graduate stated:

Look! There’s a guy over there what fucks children and hates poetry!

Dick Cheney went out for a cup of coffee and someone shouted.

What was the plot of the movie “Shoot The Piano Player”?

Jules et Jim were sitting around talking about cinema and Jules asked Jim:

Has this turned into a two-person game? Let’s find out:

John, finally realizing the late hour and the grilling he will get when he gets home….folds his cards, says “I’m out, you two can finish this game” and pushes back from the table to leave…

It was getting dark outside.

Was it an eclipse? Was it a thunderstorm? Was it merely becoming late evening? At any rate

While dealing the next hand of cards, John looked out the window and was shocked to see how dark the sky had become.

John owned a small card dealership, and had suffered during the recession, but now it seemed he had two customers in a row! As the first couple drove off in their new hand, and

Well, okay. I’ll tell you what happened.

@janbb won’t tell me what happened.

Realizing she would have to explain the stain on her dress, she was determined to make it look like an accident…

After her last encounter with Bill Clinton in his office,

If smelling like cigars wasn’t bad enough,

It’s not so easy being Groucho. You have to stride around kind of stooped over, as

Margaret Dumont n her new tell-all biography revealed:

“He wasn’t stupid, just a little bent over,” said…

Ms Dumont the best selling author of the children’s book The Texidor’s Twinge is quoted as saying…

“Smack my ass and call me Sally!!”

Geronimo appeared as if from nowhere & asked his squaw Miss Two Trees what she thought of recent events.She looked scornfully at him & said…

How did Geronimo look to you?

Whilst enjoying the sights & sounds of downtown La Paz, Butch turned to Sundance & remarked inquisitively…

“Who are those guys?” said one of the gauchos to another, looking at the two tall Americans on the plaza.

“The tall guy on the left looks like he’s a bit of a ladies man” said one, rather envious of the americano’s immaculate moustache.“Yeah & the other one is carrying a jar of salad dressing” remarked the other. “strange but….

It had been a quiet day so far in La Paz. A burro was tied to the railing; the tacqueria wasn’t crowded yet. Suddenly, two gringos rode into town and dismounted from their bicycles. Two gauchos stood watching from the corner of the central square.

Finally pulling into town reaching their first tour destination, the busload from St. Alphonso’s parish in San Antonio piled off the bus.

Well, the fur-trapper stood there, with his arms outstretched across the
Frozen white wasteland, trying to figure out what he was going to do about
His deflicted eyes. and it was at that precise moment that he remembered
And ancient eskimo legend, wherein it is written (on whatever it is that
They write it on up there) that if anything bad ever happens to your eyes
As the result of some sort of conflict with anyone named
Nanook,
The only way you can get it fixed up is to go

Trudging across the tundra
Mile after mile
Trudging across the tundra

Right down to (the pancake breakfast at) the parish of St. Alphonso.

props to Frank Zappa

Feeling kind of bad for rubbing that mitten full of the deadly yellow ice crystals in his face but he did what he had to do when the fur-trapper jumped up from behind the igloo and yelled “peek-a-boo” but Nanook hated surprises and today was no different.

Can you give me a brief precis of the plot of “Nanook Rubs It”?

Sitting at the back of the lecture hall, the blood drained out of Nestors face when he heard the professor call his name….

Nestor finally developed the nerve to take a mythology class. What would he discover about his mom and dad, Neleus and Chloris, and all of his murdered siblings?

Since his talk therapy with Dr. Freud wasn’t proving any use in rooting out his deepseated traumas,

I was worried about my Trauma and Truffle hunting pig.

Babe wasn’t up to snuff anymore, instead of rooting at my unconscious and all the truffles I’ve seen, she lay on her belly near the fire with her eyes closed.

Realizing that ever since that traumatic episode behind the bard when he was 10 years old and that sharing a bed with the farm animals was now affecting them too…Nestor decided maybe it was time to get help.

Have you ever visited the Barn of Avon?

“I’ve heard it was mulch ado about nothing,” she said, “but hay,

Nestor realized he was getting nowhere with his conversation with Gloria about Organic Methods of raising Brassica oleracea when she replied…

Gloria responded, “Oh, isn’t this just a marvy party?”

Nestor and Gloria had gone to the Barn of Avon’s Midsummer Night’s Ball.

“That rat bastard” Judy screamed when she found out he was not working late like he said but that her husband

Judy put down her telescope and came down from the roof.

“Judy!” yelled mom. “If you don’t come down from there this second and help me milk the worms, I’m going to break that thing right over your head!”

Judy was so fuckin’ tired of her delusional mother’s demands that she climbed up on the roof to see where Nestor was.

Newly married and still living at home with her mom in the one room trailer home was getting to her.

Norma Jean Baker was quite a spectacular looking woman.

The National Enquirer reported, “John F. Kennedy came back from the dead to state:

“I did not have sexual relations with that woman” (he taught Clinton well) insisted Kennedy.Although the flames were fanned early the next morning when…

So, hey, didja fuck her?

Needing to finish interviewing the long deceased President to complete his homework assignment Tommy asked…

Mr. Peabody took his boy Sherman and a new friend back to see president Garfield in the White House.

Using his high security clearance on his day off, Jack Bauer and his next door neighbor

What’s the plot of “Two Girls, One Cup”?

Scorcese once said: “Every popular film has a plot”

What was Marty like when you got him drunk?

A quizzical & yet not altogether suprised look fell on the face of a clearly amused De Niro.He asked Pesci…

Johann De Niro and his fishy companion had not gotten very far on their journey before

Hanging on for dear life on the back of the moped on their annual cross country ride

After 10 years on death row, it was time for the

By now he was at his wits end.Being at the whim of a madman & not having the remotest sniff of pussy does that to a man.Grimly he plucked up the courage.He steadfastly resolved that…

Still catless, and on all fours, he regarded Dr. Mesmer thoughtfully.

Siegfried had had enough of Roy and the tigers so he left Vegas and went to a hypnotist to get cured of his obsessions.

So the Real Housewives of New Jersey left Sieglunde out of their Wagner presentation? How else did they change the libretto?

She overheard the conversation at the next table at Momofuko and one guy was saying loudly to his companions:

“Oye moye mia!” she gasped to herself as…