If there was a pill that would increase your libido would you take it?

No, I’d spike my wife’s drink with it. I’ve already got all the libido I can handle.

Women just don’t need it. I think it has to do with being with the right partner.

No. But, what @ETpro said. More or less.

You still don’t seem to understand what Viagra does. It does not increase desire in men, it basically allows men who already have the desire to have a functioning erection if they are otherwise unable to do so. Men who purchase Viagra might not object to a partner who was more “libidinous” than they are, they might just have to take more Viagra to keep up with them. The fact that there is not a demand for a similar product among woman is that there is not a similar medical problem, a similar dysfunction for women.

No. My husband and I are pretty much in synch. So, if it isn’t broken, don’t mess with it.

And I’m not exactly sure what you mean when you say in your details:

…the lack of demand from the female gender would indicate that they do not care whether it would exist or not…

Could you clarify?

The libido. The life force. The essence. The right stuff. What the French call a certain… I don’t know what.
~Dr Evil

Nope, leave it alone.

I thought Viagra was for men that couldn’t get it up?

@lillycoyote I DO understand. I fear that I am not writing clear enough. I know what it does, how it does it and what it is for. I CONTEND that it is a tool, if you will, that allows a libidinous man, who may have a physical problem, to act upon his libido. I also contend that men have a higher sex drive than women and that, while frequently men see this as a problem, women do not and it is this failure to see it as a problem that I want clarification on. Why? Why, if your SO had/has a higher sex drive than you why would you not want do increase your own?
On the clarification issue, it again refers to the fact that women do not see having a lesser sex drive than their partner as a difficulty. If they did, I think there would be a call for such a product.
@Bellatrix just for grins, ask your hubby how many times a week he masturbates.
@FutureMemory It is also purchased frequently by college students so they can still get it up after drinking too much. I am not sure as to its ability to climax but hey, you can keep at it for “up to four hours”!

Rojo. I don’t need to ask him. I know he is satisfied. We have excellent communication and if he was not, he would tell me.

I also find your assumption that I am not satisfying my husband sexually, and that since I am a woman I must have the lower sex drive, offensive and naive. Not all men have raging libidos and not all women have limited sex drives.

@rojo the ”...fact that women do not see having a lesser sex drive than their partner as a difficulty.” ?? Where are you getting your facts? I think it can be difficult for any couple when one partner has a lesser sex drive than the other. I would hate to think that you are assuming that it is the woman who has the lesser sex drive in any partnership. Again, where are you getting your facts and could you provide some evidence of them?

@Bellatrix I am sorry, I reread my answer and it sounded kind of short andcurt. I apologize.
Some background. I have found that if you ask a couple in a, say, cocktail party setting, they are always sympatico but if you ask the same question of the guy in a bar the next day he will invariably complain that he does not get enough. And, according to my wife, the women are always complaining about how they are always being pressured for sex. Now I know I am generalizing here and that maybe I just run in an odd crowd but I can probably count on one hand the number of men who have said their wives were hornier than they were.

@lillycoyote yes, I would say that the fact that two people have differing sex drives is a difficulty, I would also say that while what I said is correct, It could also be stated in the opposite manner, that is that it is a difficulty when the man has a greater sex drive than his partner. Either way it is a difficulty, I just stated it from a personal point of view while it is obvious you would view it from a different perspective.

@Bellatrix I in no way meant to imply any such thing.

@lillycoyote I also do stand by my contention that not seeing it as a difficulty is a problem. And, as indicated i think men DO see it as such and women DO NOT.

Well I can promise, my husband would not say that. Some couples do actually talk about their intimate relationship and make sure they are communicating their needs.

If we are talking anecdotal evidence here, I can also cite conversations where women I know have complained their partners are not giving them enough. People are individuals. I equally cannot think of any serious conversations with female friends where they have complained about being ‘pressured for sex’. Do you have any serious research to back up your suggestions.

@Bellatrix no, that is a reason I put this into the social section. Everything I am saying is both anecdotal, and egocentric. I agree with everything you have said but as mentioned earlier, maybe we run in different circles.

@rojo You were speaking in facts. If you want to discuss things as a matter of perspective and what you have heard or what your own spouse says or what you perceive your own experience to be that is different. Words have meaning. It is best not to use the word “fact”, in my opinion, if you do not have any actual facts or any reliable data to back up your or my, for that matter, perspective.

@lillycoyote point taken.

@lillycoyote @Bellatrix I think we have reached an impass. I apologize for using the work “fact” incorrectly one time but please note that, barring that one error, I did use the word contend wherever I could. I also would appreciate your input into the feminine views on this.

@rojo And I acknowledge your “point taken.”

@lillycoyote I do however stand by my stated “fact” that two people having differing sex drives is a difficulty.

@rojo Yes, perhaps we have reached an impasse on this one. I don’t think I am going to give an inch on this one. That may be stubborn but I don’t see that you are going to give and inch either. Others may want to continue this but maybe you and I should call it a night.

And wasn’t I the one who said two people having different sex drives is difficult? I certianly could be mistaken. As someone pointed out to me a couple weeks ago: “reading is hard.” You have seemed to be the one, in both your questions and your comments here, to imply that it is women that have a lower sex drive, not that it is simply difficult when two people have differing sex drives.

Thank you @rojo and yes it is a difficulty when a couple have different sex drives but libido is a complex issue regardless of gender. There are cultural, biological and environmental influences and of course age. Consider too that many men would feel very uncomfortable saying to their peers, “well actually my partner wants it more than I do. I have a lower sex drive”. While there are men who would be quite comfortable in the right situation saying this, I would suggest there would be many who would not. You could probably argue the same for at least some women.

So, I guess it depends on exactly what you mean by “libido”. (And no, I don’t just mean “sex drive”). Because if you mean, raising a baseline level of consistent horniness, then no. I don’t want to be horny when I’m just driving to work in the morning, or going grocery shopping, or doing paperwork, or any of the other routine and somewhat mundane tasks of everyday life. It’s actually hugely distracting when crotch is all “feed me” all the time. Also, I don’t currently have a regular partner, so my current sex drive is pretty much all I can handle until that changes.

But if you mean, how quickly and intensely aroused I get before having an orgasm, then maybe. Not for regular use, but to try and experiment? Sure, I enjoy all kinds of experimentation, from new restaurants to new movies to new sexual adventures. And Viagra would work sorta the same way as it does for men; swollen clit and labia, and that would bring on arousal, and I’d be horny. But it just wouldn’t be as good, as satisfying (and much more frustrating) than if I went the more chemical-free route. And maybe that’ll change some day, but for now, I’m largely good.

As to women having this discussion, so, here’s the thing: When you say “women aren’t having this discussion/demand”, what you really mean is ”I don’t hear women having this discussion/demand”. There’s a pretty big difference. And men in our society are allowed to say these things, to have that demand and discussion, without a whole lot of consequence. Not none, but it’s relatively low. Women, on the other hand, are taught from a very young age that you do not talk about these things, and when they try to break out of that mold, they’re punished much more severely. And so then, women don’t have these discussions if they don’t feel safe. They take them underground. They talk about it in hushed voices with their sisters and female friends and female doctors and mothers and aunts and grandmothers and the specific men in their life they feel safe with. They have support groups for “sewing”. And when women feel safe, they will talk just as much as men will about this, they will demand just as loudly as men. But only if they feel a certain amount of safety. Also, notice how on this question and the last, more than half of those who answered were women? That is the discussion. That. Is. The. Discussion.

@rojo “I do however stand by my stated “fact” that two people having differing sex drives is a difficulty.”

It’s only difficult if one denies the other of satisfying their extra drive with alternative methods.

It would be about as much use to me as dancing lessons to a one legged man!

Mine is high enough thank you very much. I might give it to my partner – with her permission of course.

N/A

Oh boy, I don’t need anything like that. Testosterone is more than enough. (It works on women too, in smaller doses, and can actually be prescribed for low libido).