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JLeslie's avatar

Do you have one night a week that is very ritualized in your house?

Asked by JLeslie (48221 points ) December 25th, 2011

Some people have family night Friday with pizza and games or movies.

I have a friend who does Taco Tuesday.

Observant Jewish people prepare food for Friday night and Saturday (Shabbat) and spend the time as family time, many go to temple, no working, no cooking.

For others it is Church on Sunday and brunch at a restaurant.

Or, a weekend day where the extended family gets together.

Why do you enjoy doing it? Or, do you not enjoy it, but do it out of obligation?

If you don’t, does it sound like a good idea to you, do you wish you could start a tradtion like that for your family? Or, just in your life even if you are single. Or, is it too regimented for you?

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16 Answers

muppetish's avatar

We used to have ritualized days when I was a kid. Wednesday was Library Day. We would go after school, check out a bunch of books, and read them for the rest of the week. Friday was Pizza Night, my younger brother’s favourite day of the week. We played board games, but I don’t think we ever had a specific day set aside for it. Sundays, we always had breakfast together and waited for my dad to finish reading the paper so we could take the comics sections. Now all of our schedules are so different that we don’t have any rituals together. It’s a little saddening, but that’s what happens.

MilkyWay's avatar

Friday is takeaway day, when Mum doesn’t cook and we have whatever takeaway we want for dinner.

ANef_is_Enuf's avatar

Not really, no. We used to have family game night on Sundays, but, work schedules started to conflict.. so we haven’t done that in a long time.

comity's avatar

Sunday is the day my children and grandchild who live in the next town, come to visit Grandma and Grandpa. They are Vegans and I’m not the best cook in the world, but, then we have Wegmans nearby. “Oh Lord, Thank you for Wegmans and all the good food to eat. Ahmen”
All kidding aside, I look forward to Sundays!

plethora's avatar

It’s way too regimented for me. It was fine when I had kids. And I was raised in a home like that, which was good for me. Always had family meals together at night and then sat around talking. Wonderful memories. Would not be happy with a regimented day or evening now. I love the spontaneity that I have now.

comity's avatar

@plethora I know what you mean and I like that too. But I don’t get out much of late, and look forward to their visits. My granddaughter loves the park adjacent to my house and goes to the playground with her parents, comes back to talk, Wegmans cooks, my son sets up the table, and they help me to feel part of the world.

plethora's avatar

@comity Oh that’s great!!

halabihazem's avatar

I know a dude whose family has a ritual movie nights every week.

I used to attend a weekly gathering for my extended family, but I didn’t like it.

I think it’s a good idea if it’s restricted to a small number of people AND if it doesn’t make any member feel he’s forced to attend.

It wont be any good if those who attended didn’t really want to be there.

comity's avatar

One thing I forgot to say; we get together mostly every Sunday, but Soccer takes first place. They both play it and I like that they have something they’re passionate about! I remember when my son first learned and now at 46 years of age, it’s still something he enjoys, and helps him to relax away from the pressure of work.

Bellatrix's avatar

We didn’t used to but now the kids have all left home, Monday night is family night. We all get together and share a meal and I have said in recent months, it has to be technology free time so we do actually spend the time together. We sometimes do watch a television program together because we all love True Blood and it is fun to watch together. No phones or laptops though.

augustlan's avatar

Growing up, every Sunday was ‘extended family day’. All the adult kids and their kids (including me) would go to my grandparents house for Sunday dinner (which was usually in the middle of the day). I enjoyed it for a long time, but when I hit my teen years, I hated it. No other kids my age, nothing to do, etc. My grandmother could tell I didn’t want to be there (even though I tried not to be obvious about it), and told my mom that she remembered being my age and hating similar family obligations. She convinced my mom not to make me come any more. When I got a little older, I attended again at least once a month, because I wanted to. Until I refused to be in the same room with my abuser any more. That was the end of that.

As an adult, I am really not into rituals of any kind, so we never really had them for our own family. Oh, except bedtime rituals for the kids.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

Every two weeks, my husband and I get a day off together and our routine is to go to lunch or dinner. For us, just being able to sleep in together or take a nap during the afternoon after running errands together feels good.

jonsblond's avatar

Friday is usually reserved as family game night or movie night. Our oldest son comes home from college every other week to eat all our food and do laundry, so it’s nice to have this time with him. Sunday night is another night the entire family gathers to watch our favorite television shows.

I think we’re pretty lucky to have teenage sons who actually want to spend time with us. I know many teenagers who would rather stay far away from their parents. I think our rituals have helped with this bond we have.

iphigeneia's avatar

It’s impossible. For most of the year, it is a rare night indeed when nobody has any other commitments. A couple of us do manage to go to get the Saturday Special at a local eatery nearly every second Saturday, though, and then we bring takeaway to my grandfather.

comity's avatar

One more thing and then I promise I’ll be quiet : ) I have new rituals now. My house is filled with visitors daily. In the morning I have breakfast and coffee with friends discussing all kinds of things like “Does Justin Beaver have talent? or “What if McCain and Palin won?”, or ‘To rescue dogs or buy from breeders?” The list goes on and on. Then, for lunch with dessert, more visitors to talk to, and after dinner more come to say hello. My house is full again, like it was when I was younger, and this time people of all ages, from all over the world and from different aspects of life come to talk. Oh what fun! Cheers for Fluther!!

cookieman's avatar

When I was growing up…
Friday night was “Mom is not cooking night”. We would either order in pizza or my father would make pancakes or steak-ums. I loved this and my mother disliked cooking, so it was a nice change of pace. Come to think of it, she didn’t cook on Saturday or Sunday either.

Saturday nights were my parents “night out”. As this was the 70s, they usually went disco dancing. I would sleep at my grandparents house or my aunt or grandmother would sleep over my house. My parents (with a few rare exceptions) never missed a Saturday night out in forty years of marriage.

Sundays were family dinner day. Like @augustlan, it was a mid-day dinner with cousins, aunts & uncles, and grandparents. Regardless of whose house we were at, the grandmothers or my great aunt did the cooking.

Now, with my own family, we don’t have ritualistic days (or nights). Weekdays are too unpredictable (my wife never gets out of work at the same time). Up until recently, I worked Saturdays – so was often too exhausted to go out at night. We toyed with the idea of Sunday family dinners, but we soon realized we really enjoy the spontaneity instead.

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