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RealEyesRealizeRealLies's avatar

How much of what you say could remain unsaid?

Asked by RealEyesRealizeRealLies (28377 points ) December 12th, 2013

I’m trying not to talk so much. Because I think I do talk too much. Sometimes I succeed. Sometimes I don’t. I’d like to get to the point where I say only what needs to be said, in an interesting manner, perhaps humorously so, and then say no more. I don’t think I’m there yet.

How about you?

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25 Answers

jonsblond's avatar

Not a whole lot. My middle name is awkward silence.

rojo's avatar

Kind of a Haiku existence?

Pandora's avatar

I thought about that once but then I thought. After I am gone from this world, do I want people to say, she talked a lot about nonsense but she was very interesting, funny and crazy and straight forward and kind? Or she never said much. Kind of like a robotic machine. I don’t think anyone knew her well because she never did say much. I think she was a sad and depressed person.
Since I only get to live once, I don’t care if I might be a bit gabby. But I do make it a point to try to stop myself when it’s gone on for a bit.
Just be true to who you are without burning someones ear off.

ragingloli's avatar

Everything. I could talk solely with my fists tentacles.

Smitha's avatar

I’m usually quiet, but I talk a lot at home around my family and with people whom I’m very comfortable with. Talking isn’t irritating as long as we know the right time to open our mouth and also we must remember that there are others too involved in conversation. I hate when people don’t give others a chance to talk and listen to what they say.

khajuria's avatar

I also try. My trial sessions have sometimes lasted very long and caused a fuss for the people around me. They would start feeling unattended or ignored to the point that they think that something is wrong with my brain, don’t want to have that kind of impression.
Most of my day passes in utter silence and repeated introspection but every once in a while I try to say a few words to lighten up the moods of those around me as well as myself.

gailcalled's avatar

^^ What is a “trial session”?

I’d love to find more people to be silent with part of the time. As I age, I find idle chatter, both listening and generating, more fatiguing and annoying. Members of The Society of Friends understand both how powerful and how soothing the silence can be.

Pachy's avatar

I tend to be less inclined to socialize these days so my gift of gab, such as it is, has been, er… truncated.

cookieman's avatar

About 23.75% during the week and 46.32% on weekends.

livelaughlove21's avatar

Quite a bit. I tend to be a chatter box.

GoldieAV16's avatar

Very little. I don’t talk a lot. If you asked my husband that same question about me, he’d probably say about 75%, lol!

Isn’t everything a matter of perspective?

GoldieAV16's avatar

Afterthought: If you are naturally chatty, I would hate to see you trying to suppress that ebullience. I treasure people who like to share, and rarely find it to be “too much” as long as what is said is appropriate. I’d worry less about quantity, and more about quality. I know people who say a lot and are still thoughtful and considerate of content.

ucme's avatar

Loads, the wife often accuses me of “waffling on” when I see it as creative illustration.

KNOWITALL's avatar

Very little, I talk more here in fluther than RL, my husband does all the chattering in our house (see @ucme).!! I’m really more of a social loner, when I talk I’m charming, but I find most people boring and superficial- lol

Cupcake's avatar

Not much. I’m not one for superficial or small talk. I don’t particularly enjoy talking about my work day when I get home. I like talking about the kids, but not in painstaking detail. I like talking about ideas and how to improve things. I do some brainstorming out loud, but mostly I wade through my thoughts internally before I speak.

Coloma's avatar

I speak and express myself well, have a great sense of humor and enjoy talking, as long as it is stimulating, humorous and enjoyable. I deplore small talk, listening to others mundane daily routines, errands, etc. I have always been an extrovert but in my middle age now I think the balance is good. I can be stimulating and arousing company but I also can be silent if the conversation is stilted and dull.

The only really stimulating person in my life these days that brings out my best verbosity is my daughter. I find most people incredibly boring and devoid of enthusiasm and if boring is all there is on the menu I happily just do my own thing, quietly.

It’s not so much what we say, it is whether or not there is really any true engagement going on when we say it. lol

ucme's avatar

@KNOWITALL B…bb…bbu…but i’m not your hubby, thank goodness ;-}

JimTurner's avatar

Actions speak louder than words so I’ve learned to say very little.

rojo's avatar

“______________ ”

ibstubro's avatar

Realistically, 99.9% of what all of us verbalize could be eliminated, but that would make for a very boring world.

I used to play the silence game when I was a kid. All it got me was even more ignored. By and large, if there are people present, the silence is going to be filled—you might as well fill your share.

Then there are days (like yesterday) that I listen to myself run off the head and think, ‘Jeeze, are you ever going to shut up??

rojo's avatar

Odd. I am comfortable with silence but not with pauses in conversations; then I tend to babble.

El_Cadejo's avatar

First thing that popped into my head….

“You start a conversation you can’t even finish it.
You’re talking a lot, but you’re not saying anything.
When I have nothing to say, my lips are sealed.
Say something once, why say it again?”

@gailcalled like you, I find “small talk” pointless and tiresome.

KNOWITALL's avatar

@ucme lol, silly, I mean he chatters like you do, per your post. That would be a REALLY long-distance marriage…lol
What’s this thank goodness crap yo, he has the life of Reilly, I do EVERYTHING…ha!

ucme's avatar

@KNOWITALL I know what you meant, just teasing…again!
In my defence, I did cross that part out :)

AshlynM's avatar

I could go the rest of my without talking to anyone. The first thing people will tell you they notice about me is that I’m quiet.

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