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Mandeblind's avatar

Will I be forever depressed because of my insecurity?

Asked by Mandeblind (420 points ) 2 months ago

I don’t like the way I look. I hate my nose way too much. I can say I have mild depression because of it. I have denied so many opportunities because I felt insecure. I wake up feeling sad, go to bed feeling sad and all the time I am thinking about my nose. I had a bad surgery done on my nose by the way and that adds a great deal to it because I was hoping that finally my nose will be fixed so I can live my life in a more confident way. I was wrong and unlucky!

I just don’t want to go to a doctor because they don’t help me at all. I saw some before and I always end up in the same place: I can’t stand living in my body. I am taking prozac but it is not really helping me. I know what it feels like to have the priviledges of being beautiful than the average, and I feel like I need that in my life.

Am I a helpless case? I will get my nose fixed in June but at the same time I feel like it may go wrong again and I may get into serious depression. Am I doomed to forever insecurity and sadness? I don’t want to live like this anymore. I am melancholic 24/7.

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6 Answers

bolwerk's avatar

Why would you fixate on your nose so much? Does anyone actually make fun of your nose? No picture of your nose, so we can’t reassure you it’s fine! You don’t say what your age is or how long this has been going on, so it’s hard to say whether this is adolescent/young adult insecurity or something deeper.

But surgery is risky. Maybe you should hold off on surgery until you figure the underlying issues out? If it goes wrong, you really could have something to be depressed about.

gailcalled's avatar

You have asked five versions of this question in the past week. I don’t think that the collective can give you any more insightful answers than you have already gotten. You do seem to be suffering; if the Prozac is not affording you some relief, talk to your doctor about perhaps trying another anti-depressant.

http://www.fluther.com/users/Mandeblind/questions/

See questions 1, 2, 3, 4, and 6.

@bolwerk; OP is 20.

hearkat's avatar

The root of your depression is feeling like you need to have the privileges of being beautiful.

Beauty is entirely subjective, and it truly is only skin-deep. In addition, our appearance changes over time. Too many people who put so much emphasis on the superficialities of life end up depressed and lonely.

Focus on who you are instead of how you look. Volunteer your time at a children’s hospital or with underprivileged kids. Learn to see beyond the surface and enjoy the characters of the people around you. Nourish your own character.

cookieman's avatar

^^ You make a sick kid in hospital laugh or smile, read her a story, or watch cartoons… I guarantee they won’t give a shit about your nose, and (bonus) you’ll feel good too.

jca's avatar

If you are taking medication, your issues go beyond what some advice from the Jelly collective can do to help you.

Tell the doctor that your medication does not seem to be working because you are still depressed. There are many medications and many doses that should be more helpful to you

rojo's avatar

What do you want me to say?

If I say yes, will go into a more depressive funk.

If I say no, you won’t believe me.

Best I can do is tell you to deal with it and following @cookieman s’ advice will help you do so while helping others who have much more serious problems.

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