What would you have said to this woman in your driveway?

How much over the speed limit was he going?

I don’t know. She was going 10mph and he passed her so I would guess 15? I know it’s hard to accept but on that entrance/Main Street you don’t see people on the street or sidewalks. He is 77; he wasn’t going 50.
The thing is, if at that age he still speeds , the woman won’t have any effect on him whatsoever.

“I’m sorry. You’re right. I’ll drive the speed limit.”

@thisismyusername Are you serious or kidding? He would never say that to someone in our driveway and probably never to a cop!

^ serious

“Tell me why you want to live.”

I’d be like, “OK.” I like your husband’s answer.

I would tell her she’s trespassing and to “get off my lawn!”

Yes, and she was! She was breaking the law herself.

@Aethelwine You are officially old. “Get off my lawn kids!” lol

It’s a little hard to adjust the scenario to my own circumstances, but I’d listen to her and explain I take not mowing down animals or children quite seriously, and that I was sure my speed was endangering no one.

I’d apologize if I were going over the speed limit and tell her I lost concentration. I’m no pushover but speed is important in residential areas. Being hot-headed simply gets no one anywhere.

I wouldn’t have said any more, or have said it better. I’m sure you husband will be more aware of his speed next time, so no harm done.

@Aster Actually I believe your husband said it all. “Ok if you’re done hit the road.” Great.

I’m not 100% sure, but such a woman would definitely get a few “c” words, and plenty of other expletives.

If she has a problem with my driving, she can report it to someone who matters….

I’m not sure, but it would have sounded a lot like “shut the fuck up, you intrusive nosy jumped up bitch”.
Or maybe a little more insensitive.

wow

As an opposing pov, we have tons of speeders in our residential streets and it’s really annoying. Little kids riding bikes, a loose dog, maybe a cat or two….yes they shouldn’t be in the road, but it happens. I think she was polite and made her point, he acknowledged and moved on. Pretty perfect.

Other than this ^, I am getting the feeling that people are not fond of speed limits. Is this correct? If so, why?

I think speed limits are good. Some people need to be told what to do because they can’t figure it out for themselves.

@thisismyusername I admit I’m a lead foot on the highway or interstate, but when it comes to residential, I slow down for the kids and animals and walkers, etc…. Many people don’t choose to do that and because cops are rarely around residential areas long, they get away with it. If you keep speeding, you may get a large rock through your windshield or nails in your tires, from your neighbors….lol

It has less to do with speed limits, and more with some insolent rando trying to dictate your behaviour.

^ That woman is a hero.

@thisismyusername I’m not fond of overzealous arbitrary enforcement of needlessly low speed limits.

I’m a very safety-conscious person and driver. I’m also a very good driver with a very agile car designed to safely travel at about twice the speed limit generally posted in the USA. I am by no means a speed demon or a daredevil, but technically, and often I drive slower than many drivers do, but many speed limits inaccurately stigmatize my driving as unsafe and an excuse to take money from me.

If you haven’t already, I recommend this article: https://priceonomics.com/is-every-speed-limit-too-low/

@Zaku – I am that woman. I don’t particularly care if people feel that the speed limit is arbitrary and inappropriate, as it often is. Speed limits – especially in residential neighborhoods – serve to set expectations. While drivers and pedestrians should always be expecting the unexpected, much of how we operate (our timing, our percteptions, etc) is based on expectations or normal behavior. Driving is one of the few areas where norms are to be celebrated rather than violated.

On a personal level, when I see people speeding in residential neighborhoods, I get an instant shot of adrenaline and usually do something stupid. I’m not usually as calm as the lady in this scenario. I’m one to completely block a road with my car and offer on-the-spot lessons of why you should not drive fast in that neighborhood. In my own neighborhood, where my 3 kids play, well…let’s just say that blocking the road is the least of it.

Cars are a necessary evil in our culture. And I understand that people feel the need to be in a rush sometimes. But relaxing, paying close attention to what you are doing, and driving the speed limit does not hurt the driver in any way. Really.

And just to be clear – I’m not advocating regressive financial penalties for people violating speed limits. I think they should be extremely progressive. And more importantly, when a non-cop comes up to remind you that you’re juggling with other peoples’ lives, singing a Sammy Hagar song or getting a defensive because someone had the audacity to call you out on it isn’t a helpful attitude to have. This is what is going on with the gun debate right now.

It’s no civilian’s job, or right to try to enforce laws. It’s exactly how a small issue can go sideways quickly and get somebody hurt, or killed (George Zimmerman almost got himself killed, and murdered a child in the process.) Taking such actions is not smart, and blocking a public road with your vehicle is illegal and dangerous. Breaking other laws because someone broke another is hypocritical, and illegal. I’m not sure where some of us live, but down south such reckless actions usually result in a fight, or shooting. Police officers have bullet proof vests, and a multitude of weapons, training, and backup. And they still get killed all the time pulling over strangers.

If you are having issues with speeding in your area, talk to the police, and they will add additional traffic patrols there. If that doesn’t get the results you expect, keep bugging the local cops, and talk to their superiors if necessary. Taking video could be effective too, but might reveal your identity.

I remember when I was a child, my father would get into fights in traffic frequently. I always felt safe, because my father was an impressively strong man who was trained to fight in special forces. The reality is that he was putting his infant son in danger repeatedly by his behavior. Having your children see you get into fights, or worse get hurt or killed over a traffic issue, is not good parenting in a functional society.

Know your place in this world. If you want to enforce traffic laws, I’m sure there are openings in you area for police, or state troopers.

If a civilian overstepped, and told me their unqualified/unwanted opinions about anything I’m doing, your darn right I will tell them off. If they wish to escalate things into violence, good luck…

@thisismyusername ” I am that woman. I don’t particularly care if people feel that the speed limit is arbitrary and inappropriate, as it often is. Speed limits – especially in residential neighborhoods – serve to set expectations. While drivers and pedestrians should always be expecting the unexpected, much of how we operate (our timing, our percteptions, etc) is based on expectations or normal behavior. Driving is one of the few areas where norms are to be celebrated rather than violated.”
– Yes, and the norms are often higher than the speed limits.
– I take into account animals, people and cars I can see, and places where I can’t see where there might be someone. I remember playing around cars as a kid and often hiding from them as a game, and don’t drive faster than I think I can stop to avoid and sudden appearances.

“On a personal level, when I see people speeding in residential neighborhoods, I get an instant shot of adrenaline and usually do something stupid. I’m not usually as calm as the lady in this scenario. I’m one to completely block a road with my car and offer on-the-spot lessons of why you should not drive fast in that neighborhood. In my own neighborhood, where my 3 kids play, well…let’s just say that blocking the road is the least of it.”
– I wonder if my driving would actually bother you, or not.
– I sympathize with being concerned for your kids. I’m very concerned about not hitting anyone or anything, too.
– I sympathize with being bothered by others’ behavior, and hope your threshold isn’t so low that you often get disturbed by this, and I hope I wouldn’t disturb you – I do try to take that into account too, and generally try to drive so as not to alarm or disturb people.
– I hope you don’t end up in an unfortunate situation by confronting people. Some people get pretty hostile when driving.

“Cars are a necessary evil in our culture. And I understand that people feel the need to be in a rush sometimes. But relaxing, paying close attention to what you are doing, and driving the speed limit does not hurt the driver in any way. Really.”
– It often doesn’t, and shouldn’t. But there are many places where the legal limit is far below the “norms” you mentioned (as discussed in the article I linked above, and here ), where driving the speed limit can often annoy other drivers.

“And just to be clear – I’m not advocating regressive financial penalties for people violating speed limits. I think they should be extremely progressive. And more importantly, when a non-cop comes up to remind you that you’re juggling with other peoples’ lives, singing a Sammy Hagar song or getting a defensive because someone had the audacity to call you out on it isn’t a helpful attitude to have. This is what is going on with the gun debate right now.”
– Seems to me my response to this question did not involve loud music or defensiveness, but: “I’d listen to her and explain I take not mowing down animals or children quite seriously, and that I was sure my speed was endangering no one.”

Exactly what @ragingloli said. And great answer @MrGrimm.

I don’t speed. I despise people who do. I never go 5 mph over the limit unless the flow is going faster. I often have people riding my ass. I used to give tailgaters the bird until a crazy old man chased me down a couple years ago. That was the end of giving the bird for me.

I’d never follow someone to their home to give them a piece of my mind. I’m not crazy.

@MrGrimm888 – Most of your post was telling me something I already know…and stated…

@thisismyusername: “On a personal level, when I see people speeding in residential neighborhoods, I get an instant shot of adrenaline and usually do something stupid.”

I should have been more clear re: this. I was attempting to contrast my stupid behavior against some old lady just pointing out that the guy was driving too fast in that neighborhood.

@MrGrimm888: “Know your place in this world. If you want to enforce traffic laws, I’m sure there are openings in you area for police, or state troopers.”

This is where we likely disagree. Talking to your neighbors about safe behavior in the neighborhood is far more preferable to involving the police. Our “place in the world” shouldn’t just be to call the authorities on people.

@MrGrimm888: “If a civilian overstepped, and told me their unqualified/unwanted opinions about anything I’m doing, your darn right I will tell them off. If they wish to escalate things into violence, good luck…”

This is what I was responding to originally. If someone was concerned you were speeding in the neighborhood – and you _were – it feels as though someone mentioning this to you would be “overstepping”.

@Zaku: “Yes, and the norms are often higher than the speed limits.”

And in neighborhoods, the norms are quite often not higher than speed limits.

@Zaku: “I take into account animals, people and cars I can see, and places where I can’t see where there might be someone. I remember playing around cars as a kid and often hiding from them as a game, and don’t drive faster than I think I can stop to avoid and sudden appearances.”

I’m sure you do, and you’re probably a great driver. But everyone thinks that the speed they are going is the safest speed to go. This doesn’t mean that we don’t need speed limits. And it doesn’t mean that you are correct about your self-assessment when driving through a residential neighborhood.

@Zaku: “It often doesn’t, and shouldn’t. But there are many places where the legal limit is far below the “norms” you mentioned (as discussed in the article I linked above, and here ), where driving the speed limit can often annoy other drivers.”

I can’t imagine a scenario in which a neighborhood speed limit would be too slow. And if this were to annoy other drivers, my response would be that the speed limit is still probably too high.

Other than driving someone who is critically ill or injured to the hospital, there is no reason to be speeding through a residential neighborhood. And if someone calls you out on it, coming here to complain and have people pile on by saying that they would call her a “bitch” seems inappropriate and anti-social. I really hope that if someone were to come to me and tell me that they had concerns I was engaged in dangerous behavior in the neighborhood that I would not respond defensively. I hope that I would thank her for her shared concern for the safety of everyone in the neighborhood. I hope that I would reconsider my behavior.

^I wasn’t responding to just you. But some of your described behavior has been something I have personally seen/experienced.

I was literally ran off of the road once, by a woman who thought I was speeding. It was a dirt road, and we were driving towards each other. She swerved into my way, forcing me to drive into a ditch. When I rolled my window down with a WTF look, she angrily told me that the speed limit was 15 mph. I honestly wasn’t paying attention to my speed, because you couldn’t go fast on that road anyway. I know for a fact that you can’t tell a vehicle’s speed without radar when it’s coming towards you. She just decided to do something dangerous, with absolutely no authority. That was the first time I ever called a woman the c word. Not sure I’ve done it since…

Such behavior is ridiculous. And it usually has the opposite effect desired. Rather right or wrong, calling people out isn’t typically effective.

I completely understand your concerns. They are valid. And those of the lady who ran me off the road. I just prefer the appropriate person admonish me if need be. In many cases, people aren’t doing anything wrong. But others take it upon themselves to intrude into someone else’s life.

Wow. I would have gotten her license plate and reported the crazy bitch.

^ see?

Around here we’d ask nice once, maybe twice. After that your tire may be flat or something. We discussed Quikcreting some speed bumps haha

Speed bumps, and humps, are very effective. Talk to the mayor, or whom it may concern.

@thisismyusername “I can’t imagine a scenario in which a neighborhood speed limit would be too slow. And if this were to annoy other drivers, my response would be that the speed limit is still probably too high.”
I can. In Seattle for instance, some time about a year ago some safety maniacs quietly and without public referendum got the speed limit defaults changed for the city to 20 MPH, or 25 MPH on arterials, unless otherwise posted. For some streets which are narrow and have cars parked so that there’s little room or visibility, that may be appropriate, but in many places it’s absolute nonsense that people should need to drive that slowly or be subject to being pulled over and ticketed.

(And, with the crazy vibe in Seattle these days from all the excessive cars for the space, driving 20 or under in some of those places will probably induce more frenzy and road rage in some drivers.)

“Other than driving someone who is critically ill or injured to the hospital, there is no reason to be speeding through a residential neighborhood.”
Some residential streets are wide open with no traffic or people or pets and plenty of room to stop if anyone appears. In those cases, making it ticketable to drive over 20 or 25 MPH soley due to speed is IMO obnoxious over-controlling pointlessly-fearful-of-no-real-danger nonsense.

“And if someone calls you out on it, coming here to complain and have people pile on by saying that they would call her a “bitch” seems inappropriate and anti-social. I really hope that if someone were to come to me and tell me that they had concerns I was engaged in dangerous behavior in the neighborhood that I would not respond defensively. I hope that I would thank her for her shared concern for the safety of everyone in the neighborhood. I hope that I would reconsider my behavior.”
No one called me out on it. I didn’t call anyone a “bitch” or celebrate anyone doing so.

It seems to me that you and I don’t actually differ in principle in our opinions, except perhaps in terms of what the numeric speed limits should be. As a thought experiment – if a residential neighborhood seemed to you to require no unusual precautions, but the legal posted limit were 5 MPH, and if you went over that someone followed you to tell you you were speeding and endangering people, what would you think about that and how would you respond?

@MrGrimm888 Effective but they annoy me no end, as I drive a car with sensitive suspension so I need to slow to 5–10mph for some of them, which is ridiculous.

^That’s the point of speed bumps….

@MrGrimm888 “That’s the point of speed bumps.”

So the people with sensitive suspension in their cars must go reeeal slooow while the people with trucks can roar right on by. Um, sure?

No one who cares about their car roars right over them. I also have to slow down to about 5 to 10 mph to, even in my 4WD SUV, and my suspension is average, I suppose.

Yes. That’s the point. They force lower speeds.

@MrGrimm888 For the speed bumps that are too high (as they often seem to be in parking lots), they have an excessive effect on a sensitive suspension like mine, and they make my driving more erratic and not any more safe.

For me, they tend to force lower (nearly-stopped, like 2 MPH) speeds than the already-too-low limit indicates (which seems doubly-unjustified), but only where the bump is. Especially when driving alone and there’s no actual safety issue (as there almost never seems to be in the parking lots where I encounter the monster bumps), I tend to rush over at increased speed to the a high bump, slow down suddenly to a near-stop with barely enough momentum to coast over the bump, then zoom to the next high bump. Or if I can do it safely and no one is nearby, I arc entirely around them. And/or avoid sections of the parking lot that have them.

I.e. It’s turning my entirely safe driving into weird erratic driving and annoying me.

A civilized slight speed bump will still get me to be extra-cautious and slow, and it won’t have me doing annoying evasive and erratic maneuvers to deal with them.

Meanwhile I imagine people in trucks with off-road-suspension probably enjoy cruising right over them?

Me thinks you need a lesson in driving in parking lots. You don’t “zoom” in a parking lot! Just coast and chill, be patient, till you get out on the street.

@Zaku . With all due respect, it seems that you are the type of person targeted by the designers, and those who request speed bumps.

Yes. They are an inconvenience. But they are effective, and better than getting tickets in every place they are.

No. I only drive weird in parking lots when there are extra-high speed bumps and there is no one nearby.

In the spots where I zoom between bumps, I do that to compensate for the need to slow down to a near-stop, and only when (as is usually the case) it’s in a completely vacant segment of an arterial of the parking lot, where it would be physically impossible for anyone to reach my car before I got to the next bump, even if they deliberately charged at it.

Anyone who wants me to have to slow from a perfectly safe ordinary parking lot speed to 2 MPH is being annoying and hyper-safety-tyrranical, IMO.

Well, I don’t care what you do with your car! As long as you don’t cause me to wreck.

My point is that overly-steep speed bumps excessively mess with every car with sensitive suspension, even when the driver is safe and there is no one else around.

Clearly though, trying to express my frustration just draws attention to that but distracts from the chance of people relating to the point.

We only have speed bumps one place in town, and that’s on the side of the Wamart where the automotive place is. Some guy came tearing through there and smashed into the side of a car they were pulling out of a bay. So yeah. they want us down to 5, 10 mph. I have no problem with it.

Different circumstances. But you going 5 or 10 mph instead of 20 isn’t going to result in you not tearing through there and wiping out, is it?

(BTW our local Walmart seems to be a car chaos zone. It’s been making the usually-calm police blotter on weekly basis recently with people doing drunk/drugged/dozing automotive destruction stunts. I don’t get the impression speed bumps are liable to help… well it might wake someone up in time to put on the brakes.)

I completely understand. I’m not a fan of them either. But they do what they are designed to do. My friend has a cat that is pretty much alive because of the speed hump in front of his house. The damn cat just lays in the road. If not for the annoying hump, the cat wouldn’t have time to avoid cars.

@MrGrimm888 I’ll try to keep that cat in mind when I encounter the extra-high bumps! :-)

I don’t mind mild bumps and do slow down even for ones that barely have anything there. It’s the ones that are really big and jarring even at 5 MPH that bug me.

I get it. Thanks for keeping “Ms. Margaret” in mind. She’s a rescue cat. Black, and very hairy. With zero road sense, but a good heart.

I know many roads so well, that I know the perfect speed for each hump. Some, my car does better going faster. Others I know I’m just going to have to slow way down, or it’d be catastrophic.

I’m sorry I neglected to say this and it will be hard to believe but we have NO kids playing either in the streets or on the sidewalks. And to see a dog in the street is actually so rare it’s exciting! Almost all of the residents that live here are seniors. You only see kids at Halloween. So you’d think you’d see them at other times, right? But. you don’t. I have lived here ten years and I’ve not once seen a kid’s bicycle. One time I saw a neighbor on a bike; this was rare as he was in his forties. I think he moved.
Therefore , I must conclude that the woman in question is cracking up. It does happen, you know.