Would you tell a crush if you knew it wouldn't go anywhere?
Here’s the situation: I’ve liked this guy for two years now. It’s real bad. But for the first year I had a boyfriend (he was single), and for the second year now he’s had a girlfriend (and I’m single.) I know he cares about, probably loves his girlfriend and I have no expectations that he will leave her for me or anything like that. But I know that he’s attracted to me/likes me in some sense, just because it’s obvious.
My perspective is, these feelings are obviously not going away so, even though I know we won’t be together, I just want to tell him, get it out of the way, so I can move on. I’ve tried getting over him but I can’t, so I feel like just telling him and getting it out of my system and quelling any lingering hopes is the only way.
The con, though, is that it potentially puts him in an awkward situation/mental space, and that might bleed over into our friendship. We’re pretty close. But I almost… don’t care? I don’t want to be just friends with him. I want to either be more or just move on, at least for a while.
(I don’t know the girlfriend very well at all, and I don’t feel any type of loyalty to her. But I wouldn’t help him cheat even if he tried, though I know he never ever would.)
We’re both in college.
So, opinions. If it were you, what would you do?
This question is in the General Section. Responses must be helpful and on-topic.