General Question

oliviasophia's avatar

Are men sexually attracted to their pregnant spouse? Why?

Asked by oliviasophia (25 points ) July 16th, 2009
Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

34 Answers

cak's avatar

Why not?

Mine was. He really hated it when I was put on bed rest.

The answer to your question is so individual, it will vary from person-to-person.

Lightlyseared's avatar

Yes

So they are still there to look after the baby when it is born (from an evolutionary biology perspective)

jonsblond's avatar

I’ll let my husband Blondesjon answer as to why, but never underestimate the powers of a horny pregnant wife!

cak's avatar

@jonsblond no kidding!

oliviasophia's avatar

Hmmm, I found him checking out the “sex sites” on Craigs list….

wundayatta's avatar

@cak said it perfectly.

The only thing I can add is that I always found my wife sexually attractive, no matter how pregnant she was or wasn’t. Her size and shape doesn’t make a difference. If I think my wife is hot, I won’t stop thinking she’s hot just because she changes shape with a baby. That baby is part of our love, and it all just swooshes around in that metaphorical “love” space, and you could say “bliss r us!”

I don’t buy this “feeling like a blimp” excuse. There are ways to make love that are perfectly comfortable for all involved.

SirBailey's avatar

But aren’t men sexually attracted to their wives, period? (Just like @daloon said).

jonsblond's avatar

@oliviasophia He may be afraid that sex will hurt you and/or the baby. Have you discussed this with him?

oliviasophia's avatar

Yes we talked about that, too vague answers for me….makes for loss of self worth during a difficult time such as changing body shapes etc.

tadpole's avatar

maybe there is a symbolic representation of mother nature in a pregnant woman…

another angle: look what i did!...

Sarcasm's avatar

I speak from the world of hypotheticals, not from experience here.
I can definitely imagine not wanting to have sex with the pregnant wife, for the reason jonsblond mentioned. I can’t imagine sticking my willy where child-to-be is growing, seems simply too creepy.
Beyond that, the beautiful shape you came to love originally is now, well, misshapen. And the personality you fell in love with is now mixed up with pregnancy hormones.

However, I don’t think even under that circumstance would I be found browsing Craigslist for people to temporarily replace a lover.

jbfletcherfan's avatar

@Sarcasm You certainly aren’t “daddy to be” material! Stay single! Sheesh!

cak's avatar

@oliviasophia – Some men are afraid they will “hurt” the baby or that the baby will “see” something. I know, it may sound odd, but it is a very common belief. Does he go with you to the doctor appointments? Maybe having the doc reassure him, will help.

cak's avatar

@Sarcasm Misshapen? It’s called pregnant.

Sueanne_Tremendous's avatar

Pregnant women, on the whole, are quite sexy to me.

ubersiren's avatar

@cak : Twice in this thread you stole the words right off my keyboard.

“Why not”

and

“Misshapen?” Hahaha… I’ve never heard of a pregnant figure being referred to as misshapen. It’s not like we start growing a giraffe out of our foreheads! That’s like saying white people are bleached out or midgets shrunk in the wash. That’s comedy gold right there…. misshapen.

@Sarcasm : I don’t want to yell at you, mainly because what you said is hilarious. But, since I believe fluther to be a learning environment, please take a bit of my knowledge on the subject to heart to avoid further embarrassment.

1. You don’t stick your willy where the baby goes. The willy stays in the vagina. There’s a donut shaped structure called the cervix between the vagina and the fetus’ house. The fetus’ house is called the uterus and inside that uterus, the baby is in a sleeping bag, or amniotic sac. Your willy would have to be Super Dick to get to that baby.

2. Misshapen… hahahaha…

3. Pregnancy hormones don’t change your personality. They can make us moody (good or bad) and more sensitive, but it doesn’t normally cause a Jekyll/ Hyde. Some women develop depression or other severe mental health problems during and after pregnancy, but if treated properly, it’s still going to be your wife. That is, if you were truly in love to begin with.

I have a feeling that once you actually deal with this first hand, you’ll understand much better, chap. ;)

Noel_S_Leitmotiv's avatar

I was in a mall when I saw a older-ish pregnant couple. He was distant and aloof. He didnt seem to care that she was so pregnant that she was struggling to keep up with him. I would have been much more sensitive to her if she was my wife. but how her huge pregnancy hobbled her was hot as hell to me.

cak's avatar

@ubersiren – lurve! Awesome answer!

Jack79's avatar

I think men are meant to be sexually attracted to their pregnant wife. As in, biologically speaking. It’s some sort of natural instinct that makes you stick around and put up with all the crap for 9 months (14 in my case…I think I married an elephant). And contrary to the image advertised by all those gay model-torturers, men actually like curves. So yeah, pregnant women are quite sexy. I actually saw one today (my friend’s wife, 4m pregnant) and I think she’s sexier now than she was before (she was too skinny before).

Noel_S_Leitmotiv's avatar

Theres another issue: Its so sexxy when a woman isnt hung up about her weight gain and feels attractive, temporarily more so by her pregnancy.

cyndyh's avatar

@ubersiren : You rock!

To answer the question, my husband at the time found me sexy. I think several things contribute to this. He said I smelled nice. He was happy about not having to worry about birth control anymore. (Pregnancy was a happy oops.) As I got bigger we were trying new and different things to make things work. I had a lot of energy and even more drive than usual. There are a lot of reasons, but yes.

Blondesjon's avatar

@jonsblond . . .Stick a pillow underneath your shirt and let’s go relive some fond memories.

casheroo's avatar

I think the OP is saying that she doesn’t think her husband finds her attractive, because of her changing body. That he was looking at “sex sites” on Craigslist :(

@oliviasophia In my experience, my husband loves it when I’m pregnant. My boobs get huge, and I just generally round out. He says it just turns him on more. But, like others said…my husband always finds me good looking, so pregnancy doesn’t matter.

Are you having problems with self esteem because of body changes? How far along are you? Trust me, your body is changing, but its changing for the better. You will have the baby and have newfound curves that your husband will love. He may just be turned off by the fact that a living being is inside you, which I guess I can understand. Talk with him, see what his issues on so you can work on a compromise.

Noel_S_Leitmotiv's avatar

sigh all of this talk is really working me up..

Bri_L's avatar

@Noel_S_Leitmotiv – what you said about a woman who isn’t hung up about her weight gain and feels sexy. I totally agree.

and everything Dalloon said.

I have always found my wife sexy. Heavy thing pregnant or not. Never mattered to me.

Garebo's avatar

What I remember, my wifes breasts became voluptuous and were often a fortress.

jonsblond's avatar

@Garebo I was going to mention the same. What man wouldn’t be aroused by their wife’s breasts doubling in size?!

Garebo's avatar

So frustrating.

CMaz's avatar

I find nothing more beautiful then a pregnant woman.

augustlan's avatar

My ex-husband, normally a ‘once-a-day-if-he-could-get-it’ type, could not/would not have sex with me while I was pregnant. I mean the minute we knew I was pregnant, that was it… done for the duration. It didn’t seem to have anything to do with my looks, because it was before it was physically apparent. As soon as each child was born, he was back to his usual sex drive. He said it just felt too weird to have sex with me while our child was growing inside me. That said, he wasn’t looking for sex from anyone else, either. As far as I know.

CMaz's avatar

I would love to make love to a pregnant woman. ;-)

Karyyk's avatar

My wife has never been more amazing to gaze upon than she is now (about 5 months) and I’m loving the pregnancy up to this point. She’s always looked absolutely amazing to me, and it’s just intensified that. It’s been truly incredible and I’m a very happy man.

Response moderated (Writing Standards)

Answer this question

Login

or

Join

to answer.

This question is in the General Section. Responses must be helpful and on-topic.

Your answer will be saved while you login or join.

Have a question? Ask Fluther!

What do you know more about?
or
Knowledge Networking @ Fluther