Social Question

FB's avatar

So, does the question, "Do you wanna dance?", hold some significance for you in the story of your life?

Asked by FB (506 points ) September 1st, 2009

Familiar? From somewhere? Recently? Or long ago? Someone asked you? You asked someone? Was it ever? Was it never? Yes? No? Well…?

Move in any direction you choose. Left to Right. Up and Down. In Circles. Or, if you are daring enough, pause briefly, hold, and recall the stunning beauty of the stillness. No wrong step could possibly be taken here, so, please, revisit a souvenir you hold, that began, with the question: Do you wanna dance?

For me:

She was so awesome. Twenty-Something, I gathered. I was 16. Yup. It was a concert for peace, at sunset, on a High School gridiron, somewhere back in my awkward youth. Funny. I knew the band playing on the back of a flatbed truck, I loved their music, and now, in this moment, I really loved the way she moved to that music. Effervescence. In counterpoint actually, to the band, as she was creating a sensual series of spontaneous swirls against the edgy stomping rhythm of a Muddy Waters style blues riff. Never saw anything like it ever before. Like, you know, poetry in motion. This was exactly what that phrase meant. Cool. This regal fairy-like crown of Black-Eyed Susan’s adorned her long red locks, and the teasing glimpses I was blessed to witness of her beautifully sculpted Rubenesque figure through the long white gossamer peasant dress she was draped in, held my breath inside my body till the pain made me burst out beyond my comfort zone. 
“Yeah!” I yelled at the top of my lungs. 
She spun quickly to face me. Snapshot, click! 
“You wanna dance?” she said. 
“Huh?”, I think I uttered, stupidly, regretfully. Oh crap, I heard my insides moaning. 
And then, as if she was the celestial love child of Sophia Loren and The Cheshire Cat, she toyed, purring, “Now you know, I’m not wearing anything under this dress?” 
“I know,” came the only two words I could clumsily mumble out of my innocent mouth before I could stop myself. Damn. And then she danced around me. Crazy. I dug it. I started to move a bit too. Neat. And then we talked. About dancing, and other things. And then, when the concert was over, we walked off into the woods, laughing and teasing, and we, yeah, well, we, you know, well, I, I guess, I guess for the first time, yes, it was for the first time, on a bed of leaves in the woods, in the humid darkness of an August night, without any music at all, I learned how to dance.

And it was real nice.

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16 Answers

Darwin's avatar

All it does for me is make me think ”...under the moonlight, Squeeze me all through the night, Oh baby do you wanna dance?”

Now the tune is stuck in my head.

NaturalMineralWater's avatar

One of my very few no regret moments in highschool.. the final dance.. I had had a crush on the girl for a couple years… I finally walked right up to her and asked her to dance. She said no. Even though she ended up being a little stuck up, I only found out by asking. I’m so glad I did. Now I will forever have at least one moment frozen in time during which I conquered the day.

Darwin's avatar

Maybe she wasn’t stuck up but was actually shy, a lousy dancer, or too tired to dance any more.

Saturated_Brain's avatar

Shall we dance… Or keep on moping… Shall we dance.. Or walk on air?
Am I being too old for anyone to catch the reference?

Darwin's avatar

No one ever goes wrong with Fred Astair. Or Ginger Rogers.

MissAusten's avatar

I think I might have mentioned this recently on another question! In high school, I had a terrible crush on this boy in my senior class. He was very cool, I was not. He was very outgoing, I was not. We had one class together and talked a lot, and whenever I ran into him around town (small town), we’d talk for a bit. I could never get up the nerve to show my interest in him though, and for a while he had a girlfriend.

Anyway, the senior prom rolled around and my date was a guy I’d gone out with a couple of times but wasn’t really crazy about. The guy I had the crush on showed up to the prom without a date, and I decided I would ask him to dance if it was the last thing I did. I tried to do the right thing by asking my date if he’d mind. He said he didn’t, so I approached the other boy and asked if he’d like to dance. I must have put it off too long, because after we started dancing we both realized it was the last song of the night. He asked if my date would be mad, and I (rudely) said, “Maybe, but I don’t really care.” At the end of the song, he gave me a very sweet hug. I went back to my date, who was so mad that he barely spoke to me and drove me straight home. I might be the only girl in history whose prom date didn’t try for so much as a little kiss. But—it was totally worth it!

Besides that, “Do you wanna dance” just brings back a lot of great memories from college. :)

wundayatta's avatar

Oh man, @FB. You lived out the fantasy I had for every dance party I ever went to. Never happened, though. Part of it was I was too shy to ask, “do you wanna dance?” I’d done that in the past and been shot down. So mostly I went to places to dance where that was what it was all about—contradances, international folk dancing, etc. People didn’t turn you down there because you didn’t have to ask. Of course, it wasn’t that kind of intimate mating dance, either.

I dance pretty regularly now. It’s a form of structured improvisational dance. It can get pretty intimate. However, that kind of intimacy really isn’t appropriate in that situation. If there is intimate physical closeness, it is non-sexual. When you first do this kind of dancing, that’s a hard notion to understand. It’s only after doing it a while that you can learn to enjoy non-sexual physical intimacy, without expecting something more.

When I ask my wife to dance, now, her face always lights up. She loves to dance, and especially with me. Even that is a different kind of dance, now. To understand that, it might be useful to talk about how we met.

The first time we met was on the dance floor. We were doing a hand dance, and her hands were the most gentle, sensitive hands I had ever met. They were, to me, a sign of a healing person. Gentle, teasing, loving. She needed a ride home after the dance, and I gave it to her. Three times I gave her a ride home. We’d sit and talk for an hour in the car, each time, before she went up to her apartment. The third time, she invited me up.

So now, when we dance, we’re married. We are supposed to be intimate with each other, and only each other. There is no question about whether. Just about when. Dancing can relax her, and make her feel good, which is a good thing, as far as love-making is concerned. But really, when we dance, it is more about the dance, and about relating to each other, and about playing, than it is about seduction.

When we dance, we can be intimate—more intimate than strangers or friends dancing together. We are married and it is not inappropriate. It’s not risky. It is relaxing to be able to express ourselves as intimately as is appropriate in a public setting (which is not so intimately as to make others think “get a room,” but is more intimate than most people feel comfortable with when dancing with someone who is not their significant other).

Dancing plays a very important role in my life. I met my wife through dance. In a way, that was like my fantasy, but it was different. In my fantasy, the sparks were instant. The sex was instant. With my wife, it was more like a pot of water gradually coming to a boil. Not my fantasy, but still, pretty darn good!

ram201pa's avatar

For me, I asked the question, “Do you wanna dance?” He said, “Yes.” It lasted 14 years.

btko's avatar

@FB Great story – haha you certainly lived the dream. Dance definitely played a part in my relationship. My girlfriend asked me to dance and now two years later we are still “getting our crump on”

bumwithablackberry's avatar

I don’t step foot one the floor unless I’m gonna boogie, just like a Samurai dothn’t remove his sword unless he gonna use it.

NaturalMineralWater's avatar

@Darwin No, she was stuck up. I wasn’t referring to just that moment when I said that.

sdeutsch's avatar

@Darwin That song was the first thing that popped into my head too – fortunately @Saturated_Brain‘s rendition of “Shall We Dance” has gotten Crazy for You stuck in my head instead…

chyna's avatar

Sweet

Bluefreedom's avatar

“Do You Wanna Dance?” is significant for me in that it happens to be one of my favorite songs from the Beach Boys. Other than that, it’s all relative.

sjmc1989's avatar

This isn’t my story but it is so sweet I want to share it.

My older sister has never been very good at relationships. She never had a guy that treated her right. When she was 22 she was becoming very depressed because she had never had a real long-term relationship. Ok so she was a bridesmaid at one of her best friend’s wedding. My mom had went with her and she could tell my sister was upset during the reception. My mother took her aside and asked her what was wrong and she started crying saying she would never find anyone. My mom told her to stop looking for love and it will show up the second she stopped. She agreed and dried her tears. She walked back into the reception and actually tried smiling. As soon as she sat down one of the groomsmen came up to her and asked her to dance. It was the slow song “It’s your love” by Tim McGraw and Faith Hill. Of course she said yes. She said as soon as they started dancing she knew something about this guy was different. They had their first date a couple days after that and he practically moved in with her from that night on. He has been apart of our family for over 2 years and we all love him! He treats her right and is so sweet it’s almost sickening but I really am happy for her. I know it willl end in marriage they are each others half.

So there is my story that began with “Do you wanna dance?”

chyna's avatar

It has been such a long time that I last danced…

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