How fast can I get a passport?

Check out the current processing times, assuming you are American.
It’s currently 4–6 weeks for a normal application.
You should be able to get your passport in time if you apply normally ($100). But if you want to make damn sure you’ll get it in time, you can expedite your application for an extra $60 plus delivery costs. See here for info on that.

There are places in the US that you can get it in 3 days for urgent matters(unless this chnaged from 10 years ago?). You have to go in person, turn in your documents, and then go back in person. I know there is one in Miami, and I would guess one in D.C., not sure where the other places are.

Absolutely. Apply as soon as possible the normal way. If you don’t have it in six weeks, call your congressperson. They have a liaison who is in charge of poking government agencies to get a move on. That person can poke the passport people. Just make sure you apply as soon as possible.

Nov. 27th, jimi Hendrix & Kirk Hammets birthday.

and Bruce Lee’s birthday

and MINE!