If you were ever caught in the act by your or someone else's children, how did you explain (if, at all) what you were doing?

we told her to go back to sleep, she was four.

Say that your gf wasn’t feeling very well. So you decided to push her to the hospital.

@LeotCol lol that would so not work on my toddler

We told her it was okay…we were making love.

@Kelly_Obrien so you just said ‘its okay..what you see is called ‘making love’’?

The truth is usually the best policy, and naming it making love instead of fucking or some other term we are not yet ready to hear from her seemed the way to go. Children are very smart these days, you know. Not like we were in the 80s and 90s.

@Kelly_Obrien well no I know that…I was just clarifying as to what exactly you said…if this was my toddler he’s say ‘making love…what does that mean?’

Well, I am of the belief that Locks on doors are there to be used .

IF there are NO locks on the door; then install one .

However; if there is a toddler; insall a chain lock so the door can come open a crack and you can hear him /her BUT they will not be able to see what is going on….

Never been caught by anyone due to LOCKS…

@HighShaman well generally we do close the door but not always because we need to hear if he screams or makes noise (baby monitors don’t work as they wake up the infant in our room who sleeps through anything but his brother’s noise)...and we have VERY demanding cats who, if they need to get out that moment, MUST get out or they will scratch our feet and genitals, no joke

Is it weird that I’m 21 but I still have to hide in the basement and watch every feel-good movie I can find and try to soothe my nausea and try not to cry every time I hear my parents at it? No thaaaanks.

“they will scratch our feet and genitals” Yeow!

@sliceswiththings maybe you should let them know it makes you feel awkward
@ccrow well they had a very traumatic childhood

Thats a funny story, NOW. The home we lived in had two doors to the bathroom. It could only be locked from inside the bathroom. It was the only bathroom so I couldn’t lock it off completely and lock the side to my bedroom, however my kids can unlock it from the bathroom. They should’ve been asleep but my daughter who was four came in through the bathroom to see what we were doing. Luckily we were under the sheets and stopped when she came in. We were in a panic for what to say. Then she asked her dad if he was cooching me (you know coochi coochi like when you tickle kids). He quickly said yes and then she asked if she could play too. LOL Talk about losing the moment. We told her it was too late but we would play with her tomorrow so she should go to bed. Kids really know how to throw you in a cold shower fast!

@Pandora definitely, lol

The truth….say you were just hugging…but in a very special way

@Simone_De_Beauvoir To our 4 year-old it meant happily ever after like all her fairy tales. After all, we are her magic boobly boos

@Kelly_Obrien oh, I see

@LeotCol my kid would ask why he can’t hug us like that

Well…I’m stumped. It’s strange how difficult it is to lie to kids these days. When I was a kid I thought that babies completely randomly just developed in women. Some women got them and some didn’t.

@LeotCol I remember mom talking about intimacy and I didn’t understand her.

Our Daughter walked in on us one night when she was eleven and we were able to stop in time, she was cold and had heard a noise in her room. She crawled in with us and then bluntly said “Mommy, what is that fishy smell?”. We responded that we had snacked on some fish sticks only to give her the Adult Talk a week later.

I would just say that mommy and daddy were playing, and then just try to ask your toddler why he’s up – turning the conversation towards him and away from you too.

Toddler? No explanation needed, in my experience. We coslept for a while, and in our old apartment our door barely shut completely..it was rare we’d have sex while he was awake during the day (mainly because my husband is never home during the day) but we’d stop and not really say anything. He has never asked and we don’t feel the need to explain it to a 2 year old.
Now, when he’s older…hmm, we’ll say we’re wrestling or something. And then once he knows whats going on, we’ll tell him to get the heck out…he shouldn’t be walking in our shut bedroom door anyways! lol

@casheroo ; The door thing is a basic privacy thing that now you got him trained for.

“Mommy’s out of gas. I’m pushing her to the gas station.”

We still laugh about that to this day.

Hehehe :)

We began with a naming of the parts. That done, we demonstrated how various parts could fit together. Finally, we started to demonstrate the mechanics. At that point, however, the child—a 13 year old boy—had lost interest and wandered off.

That talk must have been as dry as the Sahara :D

@ratboy you really think he walked off from lack of interest??
LOL

She had an itch that I couldn’t scratch with my finger.