General Question

Facade's avatar

How do you get sex stains out of bedding?

Asked by Facade (22845 points ) April 9th, 2010

They won’t come out lol.

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

56 Answers

dpworkin's avatar

Leave them as a badge of pride.

JeffVader's avatar

Hmmmmm, I think alot of hard rubbing is required :)

ZAGWRITER's avatar

lol, good answers so far!

Jude's avatar

Seltzer water, plus laundry deterg.

Vinegar

Borax

rebbel's avatar

You could consider the stain-scissors…

TheOnlyException's avatar

HAHA your tags made my day ‘our bedding looks like abstract’

I recommend a trip to ikea.

wonderingwhy's avatar

wisk and oxyclean has always made for good results. depending on what they’re made of you can try resolve too, but be sure to test first.

Facade's avatar

@jjmah Speaking from experience, eh? :P What exactly is Borax?
@TheOnlyException It was supposed to say “art” at the end, but Fluther wouldn’t let me.

Randy's avatar

Just sex stain all over the rest of the bedding and then it will all look the same. Poof! Good as new… Kinda.

Jude's avatar

@Facade maybe. ;-)

Some info on Borax. :)

Facade's avatar

@jjmah Is that stuff safe for clothing too (jeans and cotton shirts)?

TheOnlyException's avatar

@Facade ah well, still love the tag!

i feel like i should suggest lemon juice.
people always seem to suggest lemon juice for unusual stains…

Facade's avatar

@TheOnlyException They’re pretty usual around here…

Thammuz's avatar

@Facade Is that stuff safe for clothing too (jeans and cotton shirts)?

I must install cameras in your home.

TheOnlyException's avatar

@Facade hahaha you don’t know how many people would love to be able to say that

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Screw it. Let em dry and keep the bed made. Who’s going to know they’re there?

ucme's avatar

Fuck on the floor,or in the bath,or in the kitchen,or in the car,or in…....fuck this you get the picture.

Facade's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe Well they’re on both sides of the comforter and the sheets….

Facade's avatar

Also, I’m not bragging. I’m really trying to avoid having to buy a completely new bedding set only to soil those as well.

davidbetterman's avatar

Perhaps when you do buy the new set, you might wash it after every encounter.
Another trick is to put a towel, blanket or another sheet down that you don’t mind staining.

jbfletcherfan's avatar

What the hell’s the matter that it won’t come out??? I’ve certainly never had any problems getting it out.

aprilsimnel's avatar

Well, obviously, you’re going to have to line all the shaggable surfaces of your flat in plastic and then hose it down every day.

Otherwise, @jjmah‘s suggestions should do the job.

CMaz's avatar

What on earth are your sex juices made out of? Do you orgasm kryptonite?

Did you bleed on the bed as well?

I have had my share of putting the freak on. Disrupting my sheets will all sorts of potions, poisons and bodily fluids. Blood has been the only one that was tough to remove.

Side note: Blood due to individuals monthly issues.

Facade's avatar

@davidbetterman We tried that with his clothes. No luck.
@jbfletcherfan @ChazMaz I have no idea why it won’t come out of anything lol. come to think of it, should I be concerned? :\ And no, no blood. That comes out.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Is this turning on anyone else?

CMaz's avatar

Try this… Really…

Jerk your man off. Take his “fluids” and rub it in the stains. Let sit for a while. Then wash.

Protein gets out protein stains.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I was thinking I’m not bad in the sack but what the heck is her guy doing? I’m interested in a few lessons.

deni's avatar

I thought they always just came out when you washed them? i’ve never had to do anything more than that, lol, thankfully. did you scrub the spots with a stain remover before you wash them? or scrub them three or four times? i dont know…

Neizvestnaya's avatar

Warm water instead of hot and use the soak cycle of the washer. The stains I notice that don’t come out well are associated with lubes or if we let the bedding stay down for a few days after the “stuff”. I think it’s the acidity in man stuff that determines the stain but I’m not sure. Most of them come out but a few have stayed, totally boggles me.

CMaz's avatar

Did you use some third world lube?

Ya wont get motor oil out.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

@ChazMaz
Durex freezable lozenges, HoJo, Astroglide

jbfletcherfan's avatar

@Neizvestnaya Astroglide rocks!! ;-)

superjuicebox's avatar

Put the mattress on a fence. Spray it with a hose !

Fenris's avatar

You can try some 409 and a steam cleaner. It got brains out of my carpet, it should dissolve whatever’s there. Unless the spot is permanently mis-colored from the chemicals, in which case you’ll have to re-dye the area or bleach if it’s white.

filmfann's avatar

@Fenris It got brains out of your carpet? Can I ask whose brains they were?

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Fenris Good luck getting laid in the future. Sex stains and brains in the same thread?

jbfletcherfan's avatar

@filmfann Thanks. I was afraid to ask!

nicobanks's avatar

Go to a dry-cleaner and say the sheets are stained with “albumin.” They’ll know exactly what you mean and they’ll be able to get the stains out.

Fenris's avatar

@filmfann : Stray cat got in the house and tipped over a pig iron boiler door that was off its hinges while some JB-Weld dried. Door weighed about 80 pounds, caught it’s temple on the corner. Blew the cat’s brain out of its nose. Would you rather it have been someone shooting a person in my living room? Because man, do I have stories about some of the houses I’ve cleaned under the table.

@Adirondackwannabe : Not getting any stopped bothering me a long time ago.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Fenris I shouldn’t say this, but that kind of made me laugh. I’ll get condemned for that, but it just struck me as a strange way to get brains on the carpet.

jbfletcherfan's avatar

@Fenris Oh, is THAT all it was? Yeah, I thought we had a good murder scene going here. :-/

Coloma's avatar

Are you serious?

I’d just buy new sheets…ewwww…..! lolol

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Here’s another thought. If they look like abstract art frame em up and start selling them. Look at some of the other crap that passes for art. And you could put a little personal story with each one.

rebbel's avatar

@Coloma (”I’d just buy new sheets…ewwww…..! lolol”)

Every year?

CMaz's avatar

Sheets for sex, sheets for sleeping.

Coloma's avatar

@rebbel

Huh?

I have a sheet fetish anyway..buy new sheets a lot.

filmfann's avatar

@Fenris Will that story stand up under questioning?

casheroo's avatar

I’d buy new sheets.

seriously dying over the kryptonite juices. What the heck? Our stains come out. Other than blood stains.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Marketing idea: Stainless steel sheets. Just can’t find the right fabric softener.

threadcountqueen's avatar

They do make a product called “Yellow Out”.

TheOnlyException's avatar

haha i like @ChazMaz ‘s suggestion.

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