Social Question

Ranimi23's avatar

After a year of ignoring my existence, suddenly she was interested to ask me how I am. What is wrong with this girl?

Asked by Ranimi23 (1881 points ) July 9th, 2010

Yes, I have liked her a lot from the first time I meet her, but it was 2 years ago. After six months of courtship at flirting one day it all stopped and started ignoring me. I got the picture and haven’t spoke with her since that.

Now, after a year she suddenly wants to talk with me? Asking how I’m doing? I said “fine” and stop the converstion, but now I heard she told someone else that she was nice to me and I wasn’t nice to her.

What she want? I continued my life with other girls :-/

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15 Answers

Jude's avatar

Keep on moving forward and don’t look back.

You were doing so well.

Steve_A's avatar

Likely she found out she missed out on some awesome jelly lurve. ;)

mrentropy's avatar

She probably hit a dry spell, saw you, figured you were interested in her once you might be persuaded to forget whatever was said last time, and she’d have someone to spend time with until another guy rolled around.

stardust's avatar

Do nothing. Keep moving forward. You can be polite while keeping the distance. She’ll get the picture eventually.

PandoraBoxx's avatar

Keep moving, don’t listen to what she tells her friends, stick your fingers in your ears and say “lalalala” if you have to in order to not listen.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

Ditto what @mrentropy wrote.

Seaofclouds's avatar

I agree with everyone else, keep moving forward and don’t worry about what she is telling her friends about how you treated her. She had her chance, she blew it.

betterdays's avatar

Run, don’t walk away from this girl. You deserve so much better than her, so ignore what her friends are saying. Trust me, there are great girls out there that value all of their friendships and they would never treat anyone the way that she treated you. Good luck, you’re going to be just fine!

Haleth's avatar

It sounds like she was trying to casually say hi, and you surprised her by quickly ending the conversation. You must still be very bitter that she stopped talking to you, because your question seems very confused and emotional. If you had really moved on, talking to this girl shouldn’t be a big deal, especially if all she said is “how are you doing.”

Did you have a very intense crush on her? You might have read more into the flirting than she did. She could have thought she was casually flirting with you or just being friendly. Maybe she even liked you for a while, but then you came on too strong. If you become very fixated on someone and very deeply emotional toward them, and they don’t feel the same way, it can overwhelm the person and push them away.

Anyway, this is all just guesswork. Maybe she was thinking something like, “I wonder if @Ranimi23 is doing ok now?” She might have been reminded of you in some way, and felt guilty or concerned.

Ranimi23's avatar

Update:
======

I have seen her today and someone told me that we two have such a tension that I can not be described in words. I have no desire to develop any conversation with her, but maybe I’m doing something wrong. I just don’t want to know anything about her, just hi and bye and that’s it. We can not be friends.

Jude's avatar

@Ranimi23 Is this the same girl from back in May of 2009? And, you have asked multiple questions about her since then? If so, I’d look into counseling if you haven’t gotten over her.

Ranimi23's avatar

@jjmah
ohhhh NO! That girl is a history :-)

PandoraBoxx's avatar

I think you might have to drop her a note and politely tell her that her past treatment of you really hurt your feelings, and you have no interest in renewing the relationship.

Pandora's avatar

Maybe she missed your friendship. Sometimes people don’t see breakups the same way. You see it as she went cold and dropped you. She may have felt your feelings for her were going cold and so she thought you were leaving the writting on the wall but still misses your friendship. Miss communication can kill a relationship. If you were never upfront with her or you with her than you both may see the relationship as dying because of the other person. In some relationships people take each other for granted and then before they know it it just evaporated and they figure why fight it. Just move on. But you can still miss the friendship.
Either way, it doesn’t sound like you guys knew how to deal with each other and be completely up front. Sounds like you need closure still. I would just let her know that you don’t mean to be mean but you see no reason to continue a relationship of any kind with her since it was obvious that you two don’t work together. Or like @mrentropy suggested, she’s having a dry spell.

Inspired_2write's avatar

Just mixed signals between you two.
Leave her with your telephone number to call you , then continue with your life.
You cannot put your life on hold just because she came along?
Let her know that you have other interests and that you wish to be friends for the moment.
Keep it light.

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