What would Fluther be like if it existed at any point in history?
Pick a certain time in history (or the future) and describe what Fluther would have been like.
How would us jellies communicate? Where would we ask and answer questions? How would you give another jelly lurve? How would awards be handed out? How would our avatars be displayed, if at all? What would your avatar be? Would the great sense of community be the same?
Examples: Fluther during the Stone Age, Fluther during the Civil War, Fluther in the Space Age.
Please describe as much as you can.
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42 Answers
I am not and never have been a jelly.
Yet here I am.
So, goodbye. For now.
In the time of masons and secret societies, we would have a secret handshake and possibly a hat worn in a certain way. Questions would be read at a meeting, and answers would be stuffed into a ballot box to be read at the next meeting.
Whenever we saw one of those gaudily dressed YA! or AV types running around in the pumpkin coaches and what not, we’d nod secretly to ourselves (that is, other jellies near by), knowing our answers were better than theirs, nanny, nanny….. uh, never mind.
The mods would travel from lodge to lodge, settling disputes and laying down the law. There would be separate rooms in each lodge for general, social, and meta questions. Beta testing would be left to the giant jelly in the sky.
The economy of ideas would have been formulated back then, and by now, the original jellies would all be rich in ideas. For what that’s worth.
@wundayatta Couldn’t have asked for a more amazing answer!
In prehistoric times, the collective would live in a large cave, questions would be series of grunts, and comments would be one clubbing after another. Mods would have extra-large clubs.
@Austinlad And an award would be a club to the face.
The most often asked question in prehistoric times: What’s fire and what’s it good for?
If Fluther was there during the American Revolution we would still be arguing over what to call the new country… (but whatever we came up with would ultimately be way cooler)
If Fluther existed when the telegraph was state-of-the-art communication, tweets could be only 140 dots and dashes.
In 1336 we would get tired of questions about the probable ending of the world in 1338.
And if Fluther existed when the Pony Express was the only way to get mail delivered a long distance, questions would take weeks or months to get answered.
It’s the year 2110. Fluther questions and comments scroll in 3D on the tiny retina display on your contacts. And someone is still asking, “Do people fart in heaven?”
In the year 368 af (after Fluther), the “Does God exist” thread has trillions of responses and takes up a full 4% of the internet.
By 2100, we’ll be connected to the internet with wetware in our heads. We’ll directly “beam” questions back and forth to each other. Lurve would trigger pleasurable physical sensations in our bodies (get your minds out of the gutter in advance…).
4 BCE- am i pregnit?
The asker, <3mary<3, is never seen again after a firestorm of flaming and moderations. No GAs are given either.
28 CE- What’s up with this Jesus guy? Do you believe he exists?
A user by the name of Christdawg69 claims to be the actual referenced figure, but is banned for spamming about “replica handbags.”
1776— So who here is loyal to the Crown and who is a bloody traitor?
A massive flamewar erupts leading to several uses of the banhammer.
1783— lol, problem Britain? Why all the America bashing, lol?
Another massive flamewar erupts.
1919— Do I have Spanish Flu?
The asker is accosted by users who were tired of this question, and a lively debate about Bolshevism, anarchism, and isolationism develops, leading to the question eventually being sent into moderation limbo.
1935— There’s this new stuff called nylon. Do you think it would be a good material to make windsuits? I like wearing windsuits
The asker is accused of trolling and banned.
More please, @Fiddle, do some more years?!
Alright, @rebbel, I’ll see what I can come up with!
1897— Why is Thomas Edison such a douchebag?
The asker, NiKtEsLa56 was banned for obscenity, and after being flagged by user xXxAlva_RulezxXx for “posting a call-out question.”
1842— What’s a good name for a mad Arab? I’m writing a seafaring novel and I need a name for my ship captain. Help please?
The answer with the most GAs? Chris.
1913— What’s the quickest route from Ilidža Spa to Sarajevo?
Originally an orphan, the question turned into an 800 reply gun control thread when it was reported that the asker, Archduke666, was shot the next day.
1907— How can I become a better painter?
The asker, Deutschland4evar posted a link to his gallery on deviantart.com. The fluther community didn’t provide any helpful criticism and the asker went on a trolling rampage before being banned by the mods for hatespeech.
@JilltheTooth, third millenium, eh? Alright. I’ll put on my hypothetical hat and see what I can come up with… stay tuned….
@Fiddle_Playing_Creole_Bastard ; Can’t wait! I’ll be tuning in first thing in the morning…waiting…hoping…
(I know you’re at school and have other obligations… no pressure!)
The most often asked question at any point in history:
“How can I tell if he (or she) likes me?”
If Fluther existed in the 16th century, far more threads would end in witch-trials.
circa 1186 BCE- How can I tell if she likes me?
So, like, there’s this girl named Helen and she’s real pretty and this guy named Tyndareus sacrificed a horse and told her to marry me but she doesn’t scribe message me much and I don’t know what to do help plz?
2055 CE- How many meters of concrete will protect me from strontium-90 radioisotopic fallout?
2109— 現任中共中央總書記係胡錦濤。近年中國共產黨高層人事變動、權力轉移上已大幅制度化同埋透明化，但中共家下重仍然堅持中國應該由黨領導 而中國大部份地區重未發展 人民純樸 因而唔識反抗 另外係呢個物質主意既世界 中國人錢大過天 畀某共表面既繁榮蒙蔽 為左搵錢同短暫既安定 甘願做所謂奉公守法既市民 種種原因 令中國民主之路停滯不前，因此遭愛國人士批評為
2200: How do I jailbreak my iPhone 160000?
It’s the 1940s. Hollywood glamor abounds. Women were women and men wore their pants high – and everyone with a telephone was on the Fluther Party Line!
Unfortunately, everyone was talking all the time….so no one learned a damn thing.
In the year 2525, can’t tell no truth can’t tell no lies!!
Me want fire. How me get fire. Also, what this stick do?
Mad Men-era Fluther…Say, how do I get this lady with the gorgeous gams to neck with me? Also, how many cigarettes a day should you smoke to maintain optimum health?
@ucme, I’ve heard that one too. I love both of them, but prefer the original.
@ucme I sincerely apologize for my bad taste but I immediately thought of this
@tragiclikebowie what bad taste would that be then? No need for an apology, Cleopatra cumin at ya…....oh yeah!!
Fluther in 1689:
Ascanio: @Galileo Are you kidding me, you F***N’ tard?! How could something as big as the earth revolve around the sun?
Galileo: @Ascanio And yet it moves
Copernicus: @Galileo Yeah, boy. Tell it!
Ascanio would never use such a hateful word as “tard”.
“Stupidhead”, maybe.
Copernicus is hood as hell, I knew it!!!
Fluther in 1983:
“Like, Oh my God, how gnarly would it be if there could be a mall on every block? Fer sure!”
AstroPilgrim: Hey, y’all….who knows where a playa like myself can party with some fine ass ladies in peace and snack on somma that dee-lish “corn” bizness I been hearin’ about? This bitchass king is triiippiinnn’.
SquantosPrivateFacilities: Shhhhittt, son! Come on over, we got the finest ladies and plenty of maize. We cookin’ out later. BYO Firewater. LOL.
AstroPilgrim: Aight, Ima holla at you later. Gonna get my posse together and shine my buckles.
ChrisColumbus69: Hey man, can I tag along?
AstroPilgrim: HELLLLZ NO, FIND YOUR OWN PARTY!
SquantosPrivateFacilities: That fool owes me money, man.
^^ 100% historically accurate. I saw it on Fox News. ^^
Stone age: around the watering hole chatroom: literally.
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