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WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

If you make someone a very solemn promise in a dream, do you keep it when you wake up?

Asked by WillWorkForChocolate (23112points) December 23rd, 2010

Warning: this is long but it would mean a lot if you’d take the time to read it and think about your answer.

(I swore I’d never post a “dream question” but this really hit me hard this morning and I’ve been thinking about it all day.)

In my dream last night, my 4 yr old was dying of cancer. She looked awful- thin and pale and bald. She seemed to only have hours left, and my mother was preparing to give her another breathing treatment.

I was sitting in her hospital bed, holding her, rocking her and sobbing. I began begging God, “If you will give me this one miracle, make my child healthy again, I swear I will do the hardest thing I’ve ever done and quit smoking (my hubby and I do not smoke in the house, so she wasn’t dying due to secondhand smoke).”

As soon as I made that promise, I woke up and my face was wet from crying in my sleep (which I’ve never done before) and I just sat there thinking, “I’m awake, and my child is healthy… and I swore to God if she was healthy I’d quit smoking.”

I’m not one of those people who thinks every dream means something, but I do believe that sometimes our subconcious speaks to us in our dreams and (since I’m a believer) I feel that God speaks to us in our dreams sometimes. I honestly feel that this is God telling me “You have to quit now, or it will be too late. Stop stalling.” And I intend to keep the promise I made, even though it was in a dream.

So my question to you is simple: if you make a promise in a dream, whether it’s to God or just to another person, do you keep that promise?

*Please do not belittle my faith and beliefs, that’s not what this question is about. Thanks.

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17 Answers

chyna's avatar

Answer deleted by me.

wundayatta's avatar

You keep that promise if it is important to you to keep that promise. I hope you think this promise is that important. Good luck!

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Thanks @wundayatta. For those who believe in prayer, I would be honored to be remembered in them. I’ve tried quitting several times but I’ve always given up. I have a very addictive personality and I’ve been smoking for 16 years. It’s not going to be easy, but I’m hoping that since that dream shook me up so much, maybe this means I’ll be able to kick it this time.

marinelife's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate I have never made a promise in a dream, but I think if I did in a dream as vivid as yours was and as intense that I would want to keep the promise.

As for quitting smoking, studies have shown that people who quit with support groups have better luck quitting. Also, consider using one of the drugs available for help. Good luck.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@chyna Why’d you delete your answer? I liked it.

chyna's avatar

It was too personal to share. Sorry.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Oh. Okay then. =0)

AmWiser's avatar

You seem to want to keep a promise that appeared to you in a dream. But maybe subconciously your mind triggered the dream because it may seem easier to keep a promise to a higher power rather than relying on your own will power. Also, it may not have been so much that you were keeping a promise to God , but that you really want to be here for your child/children for as long as you can, healthy.
That dream would have been disturbing to me also and I would have had to question ‘where is my life going?’

filmfann's avatar

Darn! I was all ready to make fun of this question, til I read it.

You made the promise, and it was a real enough situation. It’s not like I promised the alligators in the pool to buy them flip flops.
Should your daughter become sick in the next 20 years, you will wonder if it was because you broke your promise.
Rejoice in your daughters health, and take this as a sign. Quit.

seazen's avatar

I wish it were the other way around. Oh, the things I promise myself I’ll do in my dreams…

woodcutter's avatar

technically the statute of limitations comes into play when the dream is over.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

Hmm, I’d consider it.

whitenoise's avatar

In this case…. definitely.
The promise makes sense and is beneficial to you and your family.

anything that’ll help you quit smoking seems like a good idea to me, anyway.

Sunny2's avatar

I agree with filmfann. Why open yourself to the possibility of awful guilt feelings should your daughter get sick in the future. Rational or not , USE the dreamed promise to motivate you to do something you know you should have done some time ago. With all the latest information about the damage second-hand smoke does, it will be healthier for your daughter too. Sounds like a win-win to me.

Rhodentette's avatar

I wouldn’t. For the simple reason that I draw philosophical distinctions between my subconscious self and my conscious self.

I’ve had dreams where I’ve caught my partner cheating on me. Do I wake up and get mad at him and confront him about cheating on me because I was so upset in the dream and it felt so bad? Of course not, it was a dream. More to the point, it was my dream – he had nothing to do with it.

Having said that, you will, of course, take away from your dream whatever you see fit and that’s as it should be.

dreamgirl123's avatar

I had a dream last night that seemed so real. I am in the process of a divorce for a couple of months already and I am ok with it. My soon to be ex is a strong believer in God and so am I. Anyway, in my dream last night I saw a lot of tornadoes wreaking havoc, they were huge and they were all heading in my direction. I could see them from the window. There was a specific one heading straight to the building in which i was. I knew that if the tornado would hit the building, nothing would be left of it and there was no place to run. Absolutely non. In the midst of the dream I knew that there was only one thing that would save me and those around me and that was that I had to go on my knees and promise God that I would not divorce my husband. As soon as I made that promise, the tornado changed its course and we all survived. As much as I want this divorce I fear that if I continue and break the promise I made in my dream, things will go wrong until I obey. Any thoughts?

wundayatta's avatar

Stay with the divorce. Dreams are not real. The characters in them are not real. The dream was more likely about your fears about what is happening. If there were a god, he wouldn’t want you to stay with this guy and torture yourself. Any god that would want that is not a god worth worshiping.

Now, if you are having second thoughts about the divorce, then that is something to discuss with your attorney and your soon to be ex husband. But do it if they are your thoughts, not because of fictitious characters in a dream. It’s a dream. A fantasy. It’s not meant to be take seriously.

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