Social Question

saint's avatar

Why do so many people evade the notion of personal responsibility?

Asked by saint (3975points) October 31st, 2011

The values of self esteem, happiness, and success are in most cases a result of personal choice and action. To achieve them, one must understand the the facts of reality, and analyze the milieu dictated by their particular time and place. And yet, it seems that lots of people imagine that self esteem, happiness and success evade them because of the actions of others, and not their own inaction.
Why is that?

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19 Answers

Seaofclouds's avatar

For some, I imagine it’s a fear of admitting a certain level of failure on their own part. For others, I imagine it’s just easier for them to blame others rather than accept their own responsibility for it and have to make the appropriate changes to fix it.

dappled_leaves's avatar

Here we go again…

Blackberry's avatar

For some, it is too easy. For example, do you think anyone is really going to own up to this?

HungryGuy's avatar

Can you give some examples? I don’t see all that many people evading personal responsibility. Are you maybe referring to corporate CEOs getting richer while the vast majority of people are getting poorer? Or do you mean more mundane people like burglars and other petty criminals? Or do you mean politicos like Cheney for getting away with advocating torture as a way to extract confessions from people without a trial?

wonderingwhy's avatar

Most people are perfectly happy to take personal “responsibility” for their successes. It’s their failures they want to disown. After all, who wants to be in a position to of having to actually admit that if they’re miserable it’s their own fault? Obviously that’s a vast generalization for any significant discussion.

This however isn’t: If you accept responsibility for your own happiness, etc. you’ve no one to blame for your lack thereof save yourself – and that can be a tough pill to swallow.
I’d say that answers a big part of the ‘why’ in your question.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

They were not taught how to take responsibility.

marinelife's avatar

Our culture has been leaning toward evading personal responsibility for a while. Witness the woman who sued McDonald’s for burning her mouth on too hot coffee.

It is almost inculcated in our culture.

woodcutter's avatar

When you use the term, “so many” what do you mean by that? Are you talking about the extremely tiny percentage of whiners or all non conservatives that get lumped into that category for the purpose of embellishment?

Coloma's avatar

Mental, emotional and spiritual immaturity.

One has to be fairly psychologically healthy to really be a “grown up ” on these levels.

A person operating out of self awareness and integrity not unconsciousness.

RealEyesRealizeRealLies's avatar

I don’t even like the term “take”... responsibility. Sounds so… so greedy and forceful. And quite inappropriate for those who have not proven themselves worthy of handling it. Some people cannot handle responsibility.

I’d rather accept responsibility. In this way, it is a gift most cherished, and nothing to be avoided at all. It is awarded to those proven adequate for the task at hand.
_______

The description you provide sounds more like accountability than responsibility. Some people don’t want to be held accountable in fear of shame… or perhaps they’re just narcissistic assholes.

ETpro's avatar

There is no question some people play the blame game rather than look at what they could do to better their own lot. But the right-wing idea that Herman Cain expressed that anyone who lost their job because the Wall Street banksters ripped off $7 trillion in value from the US economy should not blame Wall Street, they should blame themselves. Unemployment didn’t jump from 5% to 10% with numbers as high as 20% when you include those who have given up looking and the underemployed because 1/5th of the US population suddenly became lazy.

Fifty million american children live in poverty. How stupid they were to be born to the wrong parents. It’s all their fault for not taking personal responsibility regarding what womb they came out of, right? And the IQ scale runs from genius to idiot and below. The guy who was born with an IQ of 80 is just lazy because he works his fingers to the bone hauling your trash while the guy who got an IQ of 160 and runs a hedge fund that does nothing of substance except make him and others billions—he’s there because he took personal responsibility for having a high IQ and deciding to use it only to enrich himself instead of lifting others? And we’re supposed to worship him for that?

Sorry, but I can’t buy into this narrative.

nikipedia's avatar

I think your actions are the result of your genes + experiences.

If you make good decisions, it’s because you had good resources.

RealEyesRealizeRealLies's avatar

@nikipedia Are you suggesting that some people have better or worse genes than others… In general?

nikipedia's avatar

Better or worse for certain things, sure. Like, my genes are not good for playing basketball.

RealEyesRealizeRealLies's avatar

I dont think mine are either.

Blackberry's avatar

My genes are great for playing basketball….....Lol.

Aethelflaed's avatar

Two things: One, what exactly “taking personal responsibility” looks like is highly subjective, so it’s really hard to judge who is and who isn’t taking responsibility. Two, just because you don’t see someone taking personal responsibility doesn’t mean that they aren’t; taking personal responsibility doesn’t always mean letting everyone who might care know that you’re taking responsibility, but rather it often comes in many much more subtle forms.

rts486's avatar

Because people are taught to evade responsibility. Once people realize there are no consequences for their inappropriate actions, there is no need to take responsibility.

Coloma's avatar

Well the infamous “they” say that the biggest hallmark of a personality disordered person is the fact they never take/accept responsibility, it is always someone elses fault and they will go to great lengths to avoid any self examination.

Quick litmus test.

Do you walk your talk instead of just talk it?

If you have to break a promise or engagement or change a plan are you honest, or do you make up excuses?

Can you except criticism/feedback without becoming defensive?

Can you hear others feelings about your behavior without becoming defensive?

Can you quickly and easily apologize if you make a mistake or faux pas that harms or hurts another?

If you can answer “yes” to these questions you’re probably a responsible person.

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