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Gred13's avatar

Is it a myth that most or all college girls are bi or have been with girls?(NSFW)

Asked by Gred13 (35points) March 6th, 2012

I’ve heard so often that when girls get to college most or all of them will end up having at least one lesbian relationship and that will like girls. The media also seems to support this saying it’s weird for a girl to not have been bi during college( I don’t remember the name of the show). I’m a guy and not into bi girls or girl on girl action(no offense to bi girls at all or bicurious girls), at least not for dating or sexual relationships. hearing all this about college girls gets me anxious. I’m starting college in the winter and I want to know if all or most the girls I see there are going to be into girls or trying it. Is this just a myth or it’s true? Can I still find a girl who is straight in college and not trying it? How many are still out there?

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32 Answers

Response moderated (Unhelpful)
chyna's avatar

I went to college. I’m not bi nor was I bicurious.

Aethelflaed's avatar

It’s totally true. So, if you’re looking to hook up, you should probably find a way to not hold a woman’s potential biness against her.

Response moderated (Unhelpful)
zenvelo's avatar

It’s not “most or all” girls at college. It is not uncommon, but believe me, more of the myth is spread by the same guys who think girl on girl is the ultimate fantasy.

wundayatta's avatar

It’s a complete myth. I was wondering how someone could hear such a thing and put enough credence into it to not know it’s a myth, but it’s good that you are asking if you are truly concerned.

It sounds like your real concern is whether there will be anyone to date. Do not worry. Even if all the girls are bi, they are still into guys, as well as women. If they date you, you will not have to worry that you are in competition with other women any more than you are competing with other men.

You will have plenty of women to date, assuming you are nice to them and don’t act all weird about their sexuality. They are just people, whether they are bi or not. So concentrate on being a good man—honorable and polite and respectful and you should have no trouble.

saint's avatar

I bet it’s a myth. When I went to college only about 25% of the girls were dweedling each other. It probably hasn’t changed that much. BTW when I was in college, I didn’t care as long as they saved something for me :)

Gred13's avatar

Thanks everyone.

Ponderer983's avatar

Definitely a myth. I never had a relationship with a girl orr had sex with one. The closest you get out of me was a kiss on a drunken dare, but I hardly call that bi.

whitecarnations's avatar

A lot goes on in the liberal mind of the college student. The possibilities of anyone doing anything are endless :D

Imadethisupwithnoforethought's avatar

The women I knew prior to college who were bi-curious are still bi-curious now. Some of them just had an opportunity to explore it away from their hometowns.

The_Idler's avatar

Well, most of the girls I know went through that “stage” whilst in school, but then the British are generally a lot less prudish and conservative than the Americans (nowadays), so maybe y’all get it a bit later.

Anyway, for some, it was a just a novelty, and for some it was a realisation. At uni, bisexuality isn’t remarkable, but neither is homo-, trans-, or hetero-.

It’s not so much a significant thing, to “try out” alternative sexuality whilst at uni, because most people have done it at school. After all, we have gender-neutral toilets in our uni (incl at the club nights). Still, I think you should expect some girls to be quite liberal-minded, and I’d advise you not to judge them on it.

In fact, you should be thankful for the liberal-minded people you’ll meet. You’ll be blessed with some fascinating new perspectives on the world and society you live in. Even if you don’t find it sexually attractive, do listen.

Either way, don’t worry about there being enough “straight” girls in uni, there will be plenty….
“Straight” remains the majority, and most bi- girls will probably neglect to inform you fully about their preferences until your relationship is fairly well established, whether they’re interested, or not.

One more note: It’s not unusual for girls to “make out” with other girls. This doesn’t mean they’re necessarily bi-, they may just do it for the kicks. There is a lot less negative social stigma attached to that activity for girls, than there is for guys. Way of the world.

Anyway, don’t forget this is coming from a Brit, and your society is even more fucked up than ours =P good luck and have fun at uni mayyyynnnnn! =}

YARNLADY's avatar

Every statement that says ALL is wrong.

marmoset's avatar

Well, in practical terms: if you really don’t want to be involved with any girl who’s ever been with another girl, you may have trouble communicating that without restricting your dating pool, to put it mildly. :) Many girls (including straight girls) are turned off by homophobia, so I’d suggest keeping quiet about yours and maybe thinking about why it feels so essential for you to avoid any bisexuality in someone’s past.

Brian1946's avatar


So ALL statements that say ALL are wrong? ;-)

Nullo's avatar

I knew perhaps three girls who would qualify as being bi, and my sample spans two universities.

tedd's avatar

I had some pretty wild college days, and I can say for a certainty that it is not all or even close to most of girls that have an experience like that.

Don’t get me wrong, it does happen. Drunken parties will spawn lots of craziness. I’ve seen at least half a dozen female friends/acquaintances who weren’t in any way gay or bi, make out with another girl in a drunken stupor. But it’s hardly “girls gone wild, lets experiment tonight!!”.. type of stuff.

GladysMensch's avatar

Don’t listen to these people… all rumors about college are true. Every girl is a sex-crazed bisexual just waiting for a chance to lose her inhibitions. Every guy is a rapist just waiting for a girl to show the slightest sign of vulnerability. Every professor wears tweed sportcoats with leather patches on the elbows. Students are divided into two distinct groups: jocks, and nerds. Every black person is either a jock, or a militant. The dean wants to expel Delta house, which is on double-secret probation. Every party is crazier than the next, and they are always fun.

wundayatta's avatar

Ah @GladysMensch I so wanted to say that, but my sense of responsibility got the better of me.

It has to happen every once in a while!


syz's avatar

It’s a myth promulgated by shallow, sex-obsessed mouth-breathers who wish it was so. And while it sounds as if that doesn’t apply to you (kudos), you sound dangerously close to being a judgmental, narrow-minded mouth-breather, so be careful there.

rojo's avatar

@GladysMensch Wait, “every party is crazier than the next”? Is that how we went from orgiastic extravagance to quiet cocktail get-togethers where everyone wants perrier water in lieu of alcohol because of their “little medical problem” in four short years.
Wondered how I got here.

Gred13's avatar

@tedd: half a dozen out of how many?

Gred13's avatar

@syz: you’re right sorry. I don’t really judge for that. It’s just I don’t want to date a girl into that. I have lesbian friends.

Gred13's avatar

@gladysmench: okay lol

Gred13's avatar

@marmoset: yeah. I won’t bring that up, thanks.

Gred13's avatar

What is college like for a guy who doesn’t party?

wundayatta's avatar

College for a guy who doesn’t party?

Pretty nice. You do your work. You see friends in other situations. Enjoy various entertainments like movies and bike rides and concerts and trips to the reservoir when it gets warm in May. You might go to the big city occasionally, if you are at a rural campus.

No need for alcohol or drugs if you don’t like them. You have fun with your friends. You can have all kinds of fun without drugs and alcohol if you are willing to open up, emotionally. I think people tend to party because it is very difficult for them to feel safe enough to be who they are. If you learn how to be who you are without artificial social lubricants, you can be just as happy. Happier, even.

The_Idler's avatar

Where did you hear these rumours? Do you watch television or something? Don’t trust that thing.

For me, uni is pretty representative of the general population in most ways. The only variations I’ve noticed are:
– The people I know at uni generally have more well-off parents. There’s plenty of working-class people too, because I chose my university based on that criterion. I have trouble getting to like most ‘A’s, and I can’t stand upper-class people at all!
– People are generally more geeky, and also more athletic. A lot of people do sports, and most people will have some kind of enthusiasm (hopefully for what they’re studying, but also for their sport).
– People are way more sheltered, I know people at uni who have never done a day’s work in their lives. And I met people in first year, who couldn’t even cook.
– I don’t know many criminals at uni, but there are still some. I’m not counting drug-use.

In answer to your next question, there are SO MANY clubs and societies and activities to join, make sure you sign up to any that sound interesting and GO ALONG when you first start out. You will meet plenty of other people to make friends with, and it’ll be really easy because everyone is there for the first time, and specifically to make friends.

I would recommend you go to/host some parties though. Get a group of like-minded people, and have a party the way YOU want to have one. It doesn’t have to fit the stereotype of hedonism and debauchery to BE a party. It’s about having fun, not ticking boxes.

Mate, you’re gonna fucking love it.

Gred13's avatar

@wundayatta : yeah I have to work on opening up then. Thanks a lot
@The_Idler : Lol I don’t watch tv. I can’t host parties either since I live at home. Thanks for all the advice.

tedd's avatar

@Gred13 I couldn’t give you an exact number of female friends/acquaintances…. But I would say at least 50 or 60 over the course of the 5 years I was in school.

I wouldn’t fret about college so much. If you want to party and stuff, then go for it.. If not, then wonderful that’s great too. My later years of college (especially my last) had far less partying than the early years (though it was typically crazier.. we had an underwear party my 4th year).

Just go in and have fun, don’t hold expectations because for better or worse, you’ll almost never meet them. Just remember to get your school work done so you don’t end up dropping out like a lot of people.

Gred13's avatar

@tedd : thanks! I hope I don’t get lazy since I’m paying for it this time haha.

Sunnybunny's avatar

Four and a half years of college and I never hooked up with another girl. I can only think of one girl I knew who didn’t identify as a lesbian who messed around with another girl.

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