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zensky's avatar

How different do you think you are from the way you are perceived by how you write?

Asked by zensky (13418points) September 13th, 2012

Or do you think that one gets to know you well by what they read here?

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40 Answers

ninjacolin's avatar

I have to convince people that I’m into philosophy and debate in real life. I’m pretty quiet in person I guess.

josie's avatar

I’ve got three degrees, so I am not an idiot, I guess. I vote for candidates in either party, I don’t care if women get abortions or if gays have legal unions. I served in the military, and even considered a career there. But left because I think the US has become a little too trigger happy-so it’s not as if I am a gung-ho killing machine bent on Empire.
I am white, my girlfriend is not.
Just about everybody who knows me for real say they think I am a pretty squared away and affable guy. Since I am friendly, most people respond positively to me. I am confident, and have no trouble making decisions under pressure, so I get asked to serve on commitees and boards and stuff. I know how to take care of myself, but I don’t push people around, but I don’t take much shit either.

Around here, everybody thinks I am a racist knuckle-dragging wing nut who needs to go back and finish high school.. Plus, there are a couple of folks who “talk” in a fashion that I do not believe they would if they had to look me in the eye.

I think much of this has to do with the fact that I think the President is a loser, so I understand that.

But I know for sure that I am different than perceived on good ol’ Fluther.

Pandora's avatar

In the beginning I believe some people perceived me differently but with time I think most people have a pretty good idea of how I am. Tough but fair and I try not to judge except in politics and with people who hurt others and animals and vegetarians. Only kidding. Vegetarians are cool, they leave all the good stuff for everyone else. LOL

Seek's avatar

I’ve been told by my closest friends that I write exactly the way I think.

Considering that those two people are the only ones that I can speak to without filtering my perceptions through about ninety filters (I tend to talk either very slowly or very quickly. When I speak quickly I often spend hours agonizing over and regretting what was said).

Writing allows me to organize my thoughts in a more streamlined way, I suppose, and to access parts of my vocabulary that are cut off from me when I’m worried about what the person next to me is thinking.

So in all honesty, you all on here know me a lot better than everyone I have ever known in person. Lucky you. I guess.

Cruiser's avatar

Not a lot but there is a measure of difference I have to think exists. I get to write answers here that are filtered and edited and sprinkled with research and presents words thoughts and ideas though very similar to my words, thoughts and ideas I would present in a normal conversation, I feel written provide a more complete, concise even complex at times presentation of my thoughts and ideas. If you talked to me in real life I would expect you thought I was a bit slow.

wundayatta's avatar

What a tough question! Judging by my lurve, you’d think everyone loves me here, and people certainly don’t give me that kind of feedback in real life. Ok, maybe not love, but respect the things I say. I don’t know if that is the same as respecting me. I can be serious and I can fool around and sometimes people think I’m being a dick on certain issues because they perceive me as being very judgmental. I do have strong opinions, but I don’t think I’m as judgmental as some people think. But I feel like I’ve made some un-friends here and I don’t do that in real life.

I am much more out front with my point of view here, whereas in real life I pull my punches a lot more. Also, in real life, I never meet any conservatives, so there is no need to say things that need to be said around here. This is because I live in a very liberal community. I have no need to live in circumstances where I have to be combative about truth and justice and all that in real life, but it is tolerable to have to tell people a thing or two online.

I think any difference in perception of me in the different arenas can be explained by the need to be more nice when face to face with a person. Online, since it’s just pixels on a screen and there is always doubt as to whether the other person is really the person they present themselves as, it’s easier to say things straight, with no effort to make nice. That attracts some people and turns off others, perhaps in equal numbers.

There’s no saying what lurve really means. Is it a function of how much you write? Is it a function of how well you write? Is it a function of your point of view? Is it a function of your wisdom? Is it a function of pity? Politeness?

But I do like to think it means that I say things that people think about and appreciate. I like to think I’m helpful most of the time, funny some of the time, and a bit of a bad boy just enough of the time to keep things interesting, but not too much that it makes it hard for people to “listen” to me. It’s that inner bad boy that I don’t let out in real life, but he is a real part of me. Aren’t you guys lucky to get to see him!

Mariah's avatar

Oh man, y’all probably think I’m a grumpy bitch all the time based on my writings. In fact, I am pretty damn cheerful most of the time.

LuckyGuy's avatar

^^ I think he’s an ass. ~ But I do like the way he thinks.

I’m pretty darned close to how I appear. There is one big exception. While I’m here I’m supposed to be doing something else instead of screwing around. In real life I have “deliverables”.

Sunny2's avatar

I think I’m perceived pretty much as I am. I may be wrong, but that would surprise me.
@Mariah I think you are an extremely bright young woman who has been through a hard time with medical problems. And you’re a trouper. And I admire you very much.

gailcalled's avatar

Tell me how you perceive me, and I will let you know whether you are accurate or way off the mark.

nebule's avatar

If my writing comes across as depressed, intense yet deeply caring and passionate about people, then yes it represents me quite well. However, I don’t think I show my fun-loving bubbly side on here much, which is there… but generally over a glass of red and good food :-)

flutherother's avatar

How I think I am and how I come across on Fluther are not much different I don’t think. How people perceive me in real life is another story. Different people might see me in different ways depending on the relationship and the circumstances.

Coloma's avatar

No difference at all. I write as I speak and I speak as I write. I think I am perceived the same, here and in real life. I am known to be cheerful, upbeat, outspoken, humorous to a fault and love word play.

tranquilsea's avatar

I’m much more loquacious in real life. I get disturbed too often whilst compiling posts or e-mail messages so I have resorted to making them short and sweet.

digitalimpression's avatar

I don’t think anyone gets an accurate picture of me by what I type here.. which is why my nick is what it is.

janbb's avatar

I think I’m pretty much WYSISWYG both places.

josie's avatar


What You See Is What You Get

jca's avatar

I think the way I write on Fluther is somewhat serious and to the point, whereas in real life I tend to be silly and joke a lot (even in my head).

El_Cadejo's avatar

I tend to come off as more of an asshole and more blunt in my writting than I am IRL

Brian1946's avatar

I think I appear to be somewhat of an irreverent goofball on Fluther.

That describes me to an extent, but I have some anxieties and issues that I don’t think I’ve ever divulged here.

Fly's avatar

I think my writing accurately portrays certain things about me, such as my very logical approach to most things, my perfectionism, and my knowledge on certain subjects (i.e. politics/government). However, I am also aware that I approach writing as a science and I tend to write very by-the-book and emotionless, which frequently comes off as cold, though I am really very nice and friendly, and I have a great sense of humor. Most people are probably unaware of any of my interests other than politics. For example, I am very interested in fashion and interior design, though I rarely have the chance to write about such interests here. I would also imagine that most people wouldn’t be able to guess my age based solely on my writing.

Bellatrix's avatar

I can only guess how people here or in real life perceive me and how accurate those perceptions are. I am pretty much an open book wherever you meet me but there are differences in how and what I communicate. I don’t tell people in real life things I tell people here. People have asked questions here that have resulted in me sharing stories that most people in RL are unlikely to hear for a variety of reasons. On the flip side, there are elements of my personality that don’t come across here purely because of the limitations of text and the question and answer style of responses here. So you see elements of who I am, but not the whole.

deni's avatar

An employer recently told me that the way I write (in this case it was in an email) completely embodies how I am as a person as well, which is why she hired me. I don’t sugarcoat things and I don’t pretend to be smarter or fancier than I am. I use slang or analogies when appropriate. I don’t believe in being too serious. On here, I swear too much, but I know when to keep swearing out of emails and whatnot. I don’t usually swear to be malicious, just to represent the intensity of something. Like I said, I’m not fancy. I’ve just gotten used to using certain cuss words to embellish another word or feeling. I think the way I am on Fluther is very much like how I am in real life. :)

mangeons's avatar

I think that I definitely sound older in my writing. Besides a lot of the vocabulary, my way of writing is quite different from my way of speaking. They give off completely different tones, which give off greatly different perceptions.

augustlan's avatar

I think I’m the same, wherever I am. I could be wrong, of course.

Adagio's avatar

Not sure how people perceive me here but I’m true to myself when I respond to a question so probably perceived more or less accurately, although how much of a person can one perceive on a website?

linguaphile's avatar

I write what I think and feel at the moment—and being on Fluther means that my writing is much more true to my feelings and thoughts than it is IRL, and whatever I’m thinking will come across on Fluther much sooner than it would IRL, where I am really reserved and careful about what I reveal to others. With that, I have no idea how others perceive me through my writing. My assumptions about others’ perceptions are often wrong—

Last month, I met a Deaf activist who works internationally and found out I was one of his favorite Deaf writers. He seemed really taken aback by who I was compared to who he thought I was through my published works. That’s the only indication I have that my writing does not match who I appear to be, but—- who I appear to be in my published works is still not the same as what I sound like on Fluther.

In a nutshell, I have no idea. :D

Kardamom's avatar

Two of my close friends can out talk me by about ten fold. So if you think I’m long-winded…

And I can patiently sit and listen to one or both of them (at the same time, which is really something) and not even get a word in edgewise LOL.

I do not have a gourmet kitchen in my house and often heat up that insant Kraft macaroni and cheese that comes in the little microwave pouch. Actually that’s not even true, I use Annie’s brand of microwave m & c.

I have never given any advice to teenagers, no matter how wrong or dangerous I think their behavior might be. But that’s only because they didn’t ask for advice. On Fluther, the troubled teens do ask for advice.

But then usually don’t take it : (

I DO share recipes and information about food and restaurants with pretty much anybody who has a pulse : P

DigitalBlue's avatar

I think, like @mangeons, my typing/written word and actually being around me and hearing me speak come off in different tones. I feel like the same person, and I say the same things either way – but the tone makes a massive difference. I don’t know if I just have a bizarre personality, but I have lots of misunderstandings online. People often think that I’m being snarky or sarcastic (and entertaining as people may sometimes find those traits, I’m not really snarky or sarcastic.) I tend to be really straightforward, and I think that it comes off weird in text. In person you can hear when someone is being genuine, you can hear sincerity.
A good example is usually something like:
Person A: “I betrayed you, and I’m confessing.”
Me: “I’m not mad.”
Online response from Person A: “Oh yeah, I bet!”
Real life response from Person A: “You aren’t?”

Tone really matters.

rooeytoo's avatar

Apparently I am being perceived incorrectly by some. A jelly recently said to me in a thread that I should be as afraid as I need to be. I guess he was trying to insult me because I was disagreeing but here are the facts. I gave up a good paying career to go to the dogs, literally. Then after a successful career in that field I sold up everything I owned and moved to Australia to marry a man I met on the internet. I have traveled all over this side of the world and have lived from one end of Australia to the other. I have ridden my scooter into aborginal camps that have big signs out front that say no white people allowed and was welcomed. There really isn’t much I am afraid of, well except flying and xanax takes care of that one. So I am completely different from what that jelly perceives me to be. Other than that, who knows???

wildpotato's avatar

You folks always seem to think I’m a dude. Other than that, this is pretty much me.

janbb's avatar

@wildpotato I have always knwon you to be woman.

Bellatrix's avatar

@wildpotato. So sorry, I have never learned how to sex a spud!

Nullo's avatar

@Bellatrix Rule of thumb: veggies tend to be masculine, fruit to be feminine.

rooeytoo's avatar

@Nullo -why is that???

Nullo's avatar

@rooeytoo I dunno. Color and shape, I guess. It’s not a rational distinction, see. :D

rooeytoo's avatar

@Nullo – so where does a banana fit? I can get the shape part, but how does color come into the equation?

rooeytoo's avatar

@Nullo – of course, it’s so obvious, I don’t know how I missed it! :-)

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