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cookieman's avatar

Married Jellies: If something were to happen to your spouse (death, divorce, alien abduction), do you think you would remarry again?

Asked by cookieman (38322points) July 21st, 2016 from iPhone

I love my wife to pieces and spend all my time with her. She’s the best. That being said, if she were no longer in my life, I’m pretty sure I would not revisit the whole marriage thing again. Aside from probably comparing everyone to her, marriage is just too much work and compromise. For her, it’s worth it and I’ve benefitted greatly as a person. Anyone else though, fuck that. I enjoy my alone time far too much and, at my age, would not want to put in the work.

What are your feelings on this?

Also: Recently uncoupled Jellies — what has been your experience with this too?

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21 Answers

ragingloli's avatar

I would just buy a new one.

zenvelo's avatar

I have been divorced for a while. I am very open to remarrying; in fact, it is getting to the point with my girlfriend that we have a discussion about long term plans. (We have a lot of financial headaches that need cleaning up before we ever marry).

Strauss's avatar

I would probably not actively look for another partner, especially at this relatively late stage in my life. However, that does not mean I would deny the possibility.

Judi's avatar

There was a time I thought I would but at his point to in my life probably not.
I’m 55 and he’s 66. We have set our life up in a way that either of us would be financially ok if the other died.
I would probably date but marriage would just be messy. I have adult children who would never say it but would worry over their inheritance.
Although I love my high maintenance husband dearly I don’t think I would mind having a season in my life where I’m not answerable to anyone.
I guess one never knows until they’re there, but I had my first child at 19, married at 21, was widowed at 29 and remarried at 30. As much as I’ve loved both husbands, I have to admit that when marrying both there was some sort of primal survival hormone involved. With my second husband it was sheer luck that he turned out to be so amazing. I was a mess. Why such an awesome guy married me, a young widow with three small children still amazes me.
If I found my self tragically single again, I think I would embrace it. To learn who I am by myself. I hope it’s a long way off.

Mimishu1995's avatar

I can’t answer this question because I have long planned not to get married. But I peek in to offer a fun fact: what you decide to do is considered a virture in my country, at least in the past But not for the same reason as yours. When you are married you are supposed to be utterly loyal to your partner. Even when they die, remarrying is frown upon. It’s like you deliberately forget your partner and try to cheat on them by going for another one. So remarried couples are often looked down on.

Coloma's avatar

I was married for 22 years, 26 total in the relationship and have now been divorced ( my choice ) for 13 years. I am 10,000% on board with your thinking @cookieman.
I dated a little and had a couple relationships/flings after my divorce in the first handful of years but had and have zero desire to ever marry again and haven’t been interested in relationship since my last exploration back in 2007–8. Waaay too much work, compromise and communication than I care to invest anymore and I too cherish my alone time and space.

I do not get people that marry multiple times in their lives. A second marriage is one thing, though once was more than enough for me, but especially those that have been married 3 or more times, WTF is WRONG with you! lol

anniereborn's avatar

No. I might date, but that’s it.

Okaaaay well, once I get older if I find a nice gentleman or gentlewoman my age it might be nice to have an “end of life” partner and get hitched for the benefits.

Seek's avatar

I can’t say whether I’d have a serious relationship again… Who knows?

But I doubt I’d marry again. should I lose Jason, I’d take back my maiden name and go forward from there.

janbb's avatar

It has happened and I won’t marry again. If I find someone that knocks me off my socks, I would have a partner again but not sure if I’d want to live with them. It’s been almost five years and I haven’t found that person so I doubt I will.

gondwanalon's avatar

My wife and I are both 65. If she died, I’d quickly sell and or give away everything we own and run away to join the circus. Or perhaps buy a yacht and sail to Tahiti and become a vagabond or a kahuna. Well at least I’ll change my life completely which would not include a new wife.

tinyfaery's avatar

Honestly, I never planned on marrying in the first place, so if something were to happen to my wife I doubt I’d marry again. I would probably date men exclusively, though. I can’t imagine there being another woman that could compare to my wife.

Dutchess_III's avatar

If the opportunity with the right man came about I would.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

No never and I mean it.

YARNLADY's avatar

I doubt it. I’ve been married to my third husband for 40 years now, and I’m pretty much set in my ways.

Darth_Algar's avatar

The likelihood that I’d find someone else I could tolerate to that extent is slim, so I doubt it.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

The likelihood that I’d find someone else who could tolerate me is slim to none.

ANef_is_Enuf's avatar

It’s hard to imagine getting remarried. I don’t think that I would, no. I’m not even sure that I believe in marriage before mid/late life. Companionship is important for all of us, but I think that permanent committed companionship might be more practical later in life, especially in our current culture. That’s not to say anything negative about my own marriage, by any means. We had a lot of ups and downs early on, but have both grown and learned a lot from our experiences and I can’t imagine my life without my husband. It’s painful to even consider it.

dubsrayboo's avatar

My first husband was abusive. When I had been married to my 2nd husband for only 6 months, he had severe complications with his ventricular shunt. As me and my mom-in-law sat in the waiting room waiting to see if he was alive or died, I kept saying to her “I’m never marrying again.” And you know what? I totally meant it!

My hubby and I have been together 13 years. There were three more times that he came to death’s door. I’ve invested too much time and love in this man to even contemplate marrying after him.

Unless the guy is a tall, bearded Irish man that can sing. Then I might change my mind :-)

AshlynM's avatar

Most likely not. Marriage is all hype. Too many divorces.

ucme's avatar

A bull ran down a hill & fucked the prized cow, i’d walk down & fuck em all
This spiffing analogy was brought to you by a caring, sharing community where macho bullshit is actively encouraged, join today & grow a beard ;-}

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