Social Question

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

Can you tell me a joke, an amusing story, or something silly that you experienced to get the good vibes for the weekend started?

Asked by Hawaii_Jake (32729points) August 26th, 2016

It’s Friday! I’m Fluthering at work.

Help me get in a good mood for the weekend.

Humor is the way to go. Whee!

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

24 Answers

Dutchess_III's avatar

Watching my littlest grandkids yesterday was a piece of cake I hardly knew they were even there.

Aethelwine's avatar

I drove past a pasture today where cows were lounging. One of the cows had a robin perched on its nose. It made me giggle and wish I could stop to take a photo, but I couldn’t.

ragingloli's avatar

How many irish does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two! One to hold it in place and the other to drink until the room spins.

zenvelo's avatar

My son told me people who are gluten free are unpatriotic because they are not for amber waves of grain.

Dutchess_III's avatar

If this doesn’t set the tone for the weekend, there’s something wrong with you!

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

^^I can’t open links at work. I will check it out at home.

kritiper's avatar

I heard some guy on TV saying that he and his wife were expecting a newborn.

ragingloli's avatar

@kritiper
Chinese delivery should ring any second now.

Mimishu1995's avatar

Fun fact: it’s possible to compare apples and oranges

It’s just a Wikipedia link for further details. The response is enough.

ibstubro's avatar

Okay, this is simple.
I bought a box of Little Debbie caramel apple oatmeal cakes at Family Dollar today. The clerk was all, “WOW!. Those look great!
I said “Okay, I agree!”
Tore the end off the box, handed her one, and said “There’s no point in you Jones’n or buying a box!”

The cakes were fresh but not great. She got a free sample.

janbb's avatar

Said to a lady who was struggling in line with two kids, “September’s coming.” She immediately started singing, “It’s the most wonderful time of the year.”

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

A doubting man cried out “God if you are truly there, please show me a miracle!”.
God said to him, ”OK what would you like to see?”.
The man said, “What about making all of the birds chirp at once?”.
God replied, “That would be too easy or dismissible by science somehow, something bigger”.
The man then said, “OK, how about a freeway from here to Australia?”
God replied, ”That is still pretty simple think of something really hard”.
The man thought, rubbed his chin, and scratched his head.
Then he said, “I want to totally understand women”.
God then said, ”How many lanes do you want that freeway to be?”

Call_Me_Jay's avatar

At the age of 10 I went to summer camp. We rode horses, sang around the campfire, and sailed little boats. It was glorious. One of the best summers of my life.

I lost my glasses early on when we were paddling kayaks around the lake. I was (and am) very nearsighted.

Even though I couldn’t see much, at the rifle and archery ranges I scored really high. Lots of bulls-eyes! The counselors gave me a certificate for marksmanship.

I told that story for thirty years. And finally someone said, “How do you know? You couldn’t see anything!”

Thanks, camp counselors, for making me feel like a sharpshooter!

Aethelwine's avatar

I bet jellyfish are sad that there are no peanut butter fish.

ragingloli's avatar

What is the difference between two dicks and a joke? You can not take a joke.

Dutchess_III's avatar

What did the gay deer say when he walked out of the bar?.
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“I can’t believe I blew 50 bucks back there.”

janbb's avatar

^^ Not sure why the deer has to be gay in that joke.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Well, I guess it could have read “What did the female deer say when she walked out of the bar….” That would have been politically correct, anyway.

janbb's avatar

Or “What did the doe say…”

Dutchess_III's avatar

I’ll let the fb guy who posted it know he was wrong.

Response moderated (Obscene)
Response moderated (Obscene)

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