Social Question

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

Why do some people who are in relationships they do not see as forever get upset when the relationship stalls?

Asked by Hypocrisy_Central (26821points) December 7th, 2016

Seen it here for years (but not just here), people asking questions about a relationship that seems to be going south, and not too happy of that fact. Why bother? If the relationship, no matter how long it went never got serious enough to become permanent, then true reasoning had to say there was an end somewhere in the future, so it if comes before one got tired or found something new, it was not like it was locked in, it is what it is, why not move on?

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10 Answers

zenvelo's avatar

The sad reality is, ALL relationships end. Some end with one person dying, but they all end.

But we as a society and popular culture hold onto the myth of soul mates/endless love/never going to end. And when it comes to a halt, people take it as a remark upon their own lovability, when most often it is a statement about the other person.

Accepting reality may hurt, so they cling to the hope that it might just a temporary rough spot in the relationship.

Mariah's avatar

Your cat or dog will die eventually, before you die. So why be sad they’re dying today?

I don’t follow your logic here, HC. Knowing something will end doesn’t mean that that ending can’t still be sad.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

@Mariah Your cat or dog will die eventually, before you die. So why be sad they’re dying today?
The relationship between pets and owners are different in that the pet will likely be there until it’s death, no really having the inclination to leave being the procession of whom processes it, call it the owner if you will. If it gets lost and picked up by another and never finds its way back to the original owner, the pet will get over it and start living under the new dispensation of its life. I think the thought would be different if people knew from the start the pet can decide on its own to go find another master and there was nothing that could be done about it. Dying the pet has no real choice, it is not as if they choose to, not like getting tired of its master and going to find another, when people get tired of their beast and jettison them from their life, they are not sad about that.

Pachy's avatar

The mind and the heart do not always agree.

cazzie's avatar

Does ‘making it permanent ’ somehow guarantee it won’t stall or stagnate? That the parties won’t somehow find they can’t stand each other? Because that happens to such an extent that they invented this thing called a divorce. It’s been around for a very long time. What does ‘making it permanent’ mean, exactly?

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

^ What does ‘making it permanent’ mean, exactly?
If you do not know, chances are you will never have a permanent relationship, then again, that is what some like, ride it out until something better comes along.

cazzie's avatar

So…. how are you going with your permanent relationship? (I don’t subscribe to your myths about finding only one)

cazzie's avatar

(and I do have permanent relationships, so… try doing that ‘judge not’ thing from that book you are so fond of.)

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

^ So…. how are you going with your permanent relationship?
Having learned from all the go-nowhere, relationships of the past, I am out for substance not flash. Whom I see that as I am working on it, Lord’s will we will be together until death.

(and I do have permanent relationships, so… try doing that ‘judge not’ thing from that book you are so fond of.)
I don’t and won’t have to judge anything, any facts speak for themselves, if you are in a permanent relationship, I guess the facts of that is one of you will bury the other, if not, then the facts would show it wasn’t that permanent.

(I don’t subscribe to your myths about finding only one)
The thing about myths, they get energy from those who wish to believe over fact. If you think it is a myth that each person can have a permanent relationship with another because there might have been several possibilities, then reason say there might not be any permanent relationships because one or the other will see options to choose, not like you have the choice, your hair color or bald, you cannot naturally decide you don’t like to be Blonde and go be a natural brunette.

cazzie's avatar

Thank god for Rogaine and hair dye.

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