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extolsmith's avatar

Is self-importance reason for modern large families?

Asked by extolsmith (440points) August 20th, 2007 from iPhone

In the passed, lack of prevention and need of more hands seems to be reasons. Today, people with large families seem to want have their own reasons.

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7 Answers

mzgator's avatar

Of the people I personally who have very large families, ( 5 or 6 children), self importance is not part of their personality. Raising children takes a lot of time, patience, money and self sacrifice. I, myself, have only one child. I could not imagine being able to devote enough time to that many children or even being able to afford to give them what they need and some of what they want. I am always wondering if I am doing the right thing or spending enough quality time with just my one daughter. The people I know are all doing a wonderful job. A friend of my husband and mine has 6 children and homeschools all of them. She does this because all of her life she wanted a big family and was willing to sacrifice other things to make that a reality. The sacrifices she says she has had to make were all worth it when she looks at each of her children. I suppose there are other people who have large families for different reasons than I have said, but these have been the ones I have known. I will also say that these large families that we are acquainted with are beautiful, thriving families with well behaved and much loved children. My hat is off to anyone who can manage a big family in today's world.

Jill_E's avatar

I grew up next door with a family of seven children. They are one of the sweetest people. The parents love children and always wanted a big family. I remember each Christmas they would buy the biggest christmas tree each year and have the family together. Now this family is huge, with spouses and grandchildren. It is a house full of love. I can't imagine raising seven children, it is not for me. Before I did want five children, but now three or two kids altogether for energy and enough attention after having our first one. One of our friends have four children and thinking about 5 children. And they homeschool as well. The mom always wanted a big family as well and her dreams came true.

bob's avatar

My dad's family is much larger than mine, and it's amazing to see his brother and 5 sisters interact. Large families are great, and they've been around for a long time. It's strange that it's now unusual to have a large family.

Some people (e.g., some Catholics and Mormons) have large families for religious reasons. But lots of families see children as a blessing and want to have as many as possible. It's not a bad thing to have a big family.

Assuming that large families come from "self-importance" seems like a mistake to me. Having no kids can be a way of being self-important; maybe having lots of kids can be self-important, too -- but there are so many good things about kids that I don't think you can presume that self-importance is in the top fifty reasons for having big families.

omfgTALIjustIMDu's avatar

This is a family of 19: two parents and 17 children. Duggar Family

Emilyy's avatar

Maybe this is a new question, but what constitutes a large family? I feel like in this day and age, people are getting married older and having kids older (in some cases), so people are maybe having less kids? A nuclear family is, what, two kids? So does anything more than that constitute large? I feel like four kids is a big family at this point. My sisters are 30 and 32, not married yet and no kids. I feel like if you get married and start having kids at age 35, you’re probably not going to have 7 or 8 kids.

Also, there are situations in which self-importance has nothing to do with the number of kids you have…many women might not want to have more kids, but they might just not have access to or knowledge regarding birth control.

extolsmith's avatar

I have in mind a modern, western large family, consisting 4 or more children most of whom were conceive out of choose. These large families are whom I have in mind. I am just trying to understand motive. As you point out Emily, the decision to have a large family must be made early in life and so the decision marry young is also in question, but I would hold that decision apart from this one.

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