General Question

syz's avatar

Funniest mispeak?

Asked by syz (35649points) December 26th, 2008

I’ve had multiple clients call the clinic and tell me that their dog is emancipated (rather than emaciated), and we’ve had people ask us if we can cure polio (parvo), but today was a new one. A woman who thought that her dog had been poisoned, when asked his symptoms, told me that he was nostalgic (which I assume was meant to be lethargic). Any other great errors out there?

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31 Answers

scamp's avatar

Ha ha! I remember a client bringing his dog in for it’s shots, and when the doctor said ‘this one is for distemper,” the guy actually said… don’t give him that one. he’s a guard dog, and I want him to be mean!!

Another guy looked at his dog’s ear mites under the microscope and yelled Monsters!!

augustlan's avatar

I once had a friend (a teacher, no less) who mispoke nearly every time she opened her mouth. Examples: “I just saw thunder!” (Um, no you didn’t.) “He was in the 38th medallion.” (She meant battalion.) She also said ‘Valen- times Day’. I’m one of those awful people who correct others, but with her I had to stop…it was just too often!

My youngest daughter said ‘pacuter’ for computer for several years. For some reason, that always made me smile.

AstroChuck's avatar

More than once I’ve picked up a letter at a mailbox (I’m a mailman, in case some don’t know) that had “Does not resign here” written on it.
Also, I have a friend who often has “a scratch to itch.”

krose1223's avatar

Oh gosh, I love these… ha. Just off the top of my head I have heard someone say she was an “expected mommy”. I have another friend who says everything is “crucial” when it makes absolutely no sense. She’d always tell me “you’re so crucial kels” when I was being a bitch or something. Or if she was fighting with her fiance “I was mad, it was pretty crucial.” Ha.

And the best one of all, my son says “bup” when he wants down.

wildflower's avatar

Oh I get these on a daily basis – an added bonus of working with non-native English speakers :)
Most recent example was someone saying “constipated” when they meant “congested”. It was particularly funny because it was referring to someone else sounding like they have a cold :)

syz's avatar

He he he, the first side bar question is about Sarah Palin. Hmmm, I wonder why she would show up in a question about spoken bloopers? =====>

autumn43's avatar

A friend who was planning her wedding told me she was having roses and baby’s breasts in her bouquet….I told her it was baby’s breath, but she didn’t believe me!

My mother worked with a woman who loved her new radio tires.

90s_kid's avatar

@ autumn
Thank you for making me laugh. I needed it.

these are newspaper bloopers. Always make me laugh.

AlfredaPrufrock's avatar

My mother-in-law suggested that I plant “cannons” in my front yard. (Canna)

augustlan's avatar

@AP: Well, that’d be a different look for sure!

AlfredaPrufrock's avatar

@augustian, it’s a good defense against “Indians” who live in Indiana…

joni1977's avatar

My boss is constantly correcting me, but I don’t have the heart to tell her the word is SUPPOSEDLY which she pronounces “supposebly” and she’s not the only one I hear say it this way. I also hate to hear her say “yesterdy”. It’s so annoying, but what can you say to someone who thinks they’re always right.

krose1223's avatar

@joni- YESSS!! Supposebly drives me nuts!

And most people say mischivous wrong. Oh oh oh!!! And in Texas a welT is a welP. I hate that one. And oil is ol. *shivers** I don’t like Texas.

joni1977's avatar

@krose, I know exactly what you mean. I was born and raised in Texas, but thank goodness I had an excellent english and grammar teacher! lol

krose1223's avatar

I think we might get some hell for this… prepare yourself.

syz's avatar

Try living in the south, where there are apparently no words that end with a “g”. Going is “goin”, something is “sumthin”, and so on. It’s so tiresome.

delirium's avatar

My favorites are probably unintentional puns. I vaguely recall having a conversation with someone online about old age and a friends response was “Go go youthanasia!”

joeysefika's avatar

My auntie rang up and told my mum that she was getting one of those new STD TV’s (Obviously she meant LCD, very funny though)

madcapper's avatar

my mom told me I was a “piece of shit” and since she never swears I am assuming she had too much nog… total misspeak its funny haha!

madcapper's avatar

@syz also “sister” strangely translates to “fiancee” in the south…

scamp's avatar

@syz speaking of the south, how about calling one’s children Young uns? I met a man in Florida who likes to say he is dehyphenated when he is really thirsty!

cookieman's avatar

Ones I’ve heard are:

Liberry (Library)

I am famined. (famished)

Can you believe her velocity? (audacity)

90s_kid's avatar

@ joni


I hate that!

How do you say adult?

A dolt
A dolt
A dult
A dult

I say A dult

joni1977's avatar

I say it the same way, but I’ve heard more than southerners pronounce it all the other ways. We also don’t call all the “In-juns” Co-mane-chees…LMAO

madcapper's avatar

Tracture = Tractor
Winda = Window
Pellow = Pillow

90s_kid's avatar

@ madcaper

winda=rhode island accent

Pahk the cah in the hahvahd yahd.

And Joni my dad always uses Ingine it annoys me.

madcapper's avatar

@ 90s winda is in the form of a redneck accent that transcends state boundaries…
clearly you have never been to Ohio! haha

krose1223's avatar

I say pellow and melk… I blame it on my sisters!!

90s_kid's avatar

@ madcapper

Oooh. I live in Boston and go to Providence a lot so yea. I still have some trouble deciphering Boston accent from Providence :S.
I have been to Ohio, but only for a plain stop :).

madcapper's avatar

@ 90’s haha right on man, I was just making a joke, unfortunately the spelling of winda could be taken in a few accents which can’t be detected via text so I think we are both right

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