General Question

Jude's avatar

Have you ever been in a situation where despite how sorry someone said that they were (and they meant it), you still had a hard time forgiving them?

Asked by Jude (32112points) March 12th, 2009

How long was it before you could say that you truly forgave them (or maybe, you didn’t)?

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8 Answers

SpatzieLover's avatar

Hmpfh…One of ‘em I’ll forgive when he dies…

augustlan's avatar

Yes. I haven’t.

DrasticDreamer's avatar

Yes, multiple times. I… Moved on, or tried to, after thinking about things in depth. I suppose I did forgive because some people who hurt me deeply are still in my life. What I didn’t do and probably won’t ever be able to do, is forget. There are some days, when I’m already in a bad mood, maybe, or I’m arguing with the person directly involved, where I get angry at them all over again for what they did, but I try very hard to separate current issues from the past. Maybe that’s not forgiveness… I don’t really know. But I try to forgive them, anyway. And the reason I try is because I’m not perfect either and I’ve made some pretty stupid mistakes myself.

Some people though… I will never forgive, because they don’t deserve it. That’s what it boils down to, I guess. Is the person even worthy of forgiveness? If so, try. If not… Just move on.

casheroo's avatar

I know of one person that I will never forgive. It doesn’t affect my life, but I just could never forgive the things he did/said.
I’m not a forgiving person. I’m forgetful though. Not on purpose..I just have a bad memory. You have to do something pretty major for me to remember it.

delirium's avatar

Yes. I haven’t.

Give me a year, and then maybe I’ll forgive him for what he did to my heartbits.

delirium's avatar

Also:

It doesn’t matter how logical it is or isn’t to forgive someone. A betrayal is a betrayal. Even the strongest of us find our weak points in these situations. Feelings don’t have to make sense.

Let me say it again.

Feelings do not have to make sense.
Healing takes a different amount of time for different people, and usually in any situation there is one person who is the aggressor and one who is the victim (especially when relationships end badly, and I assume this is what you’re talking about from your previous question).
I know that I won’t be able to forgive He Who Shall Not Be Named until he faces the pain that he put me through. And I still resent him for how easy a time he had of it. I don’t know if I’ll ever completely forgive him. And its not my responsibility to forgive him anyways. Its something that I can do When I’m Ready.

Jude's avatar

Thanks for answering.

@delirium this has nothing to do with my previous question. It has to do with something that had happened in my past.

Mr_M's avatar

I don’t feel “forgiving” is a necessary component of life.

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