Social Question

erichw1504's avatar

Do you frown upon people who don't put even a single decoration up for the holidays?

Asked by erichw1504 (26417points) November 16th, 2009

Is it sad how on the most celebrated holidays, some people don’t even bother to put up one single decoration on or in their home? How do you feel about this? Or are you one of them?! If you are, why?

Is it because they’re lazy or don’t like to celebrate in such a way? Is there some other explanation?

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76 Answers

Mamradpivo's avatar

I don’t decorate. It’s not because I don’t want to celebrate a particular holiday; it’s because I don’t believe that celebration and spending lots of money on crap made in China to put on my walls are the same thing.

We do have a small Christmas tree. My wife and I are never home at Christmas, so we don’t feel the need to put up decorations for the neighbors.

And I would never decorate for any other holiday, it’s just not my style.

Sarcasm's avatar

I congratulate them for not annoying my eyes.

I don’t put up decorations. They bother me. They don’t do anything for me, it’s just a pain in the ass to put up and an even bigger pain in the ass to take down.
That I like about holidays is being together with my family, enjoying good meals. I don’t care whether or not there are lights and ornaments and stuffed snowmen/reindeer/santas.

Austinlad's avatar

And how grand it is that we live in a country where we are free to express our individual religious beliefs and means of celebration in each our own way, even privately.

JLeslie's avatar

I don’t decorate for Christmas because I am Jewish.

I did not even realize there is judgement about this.

trogdor_87's avatar

No, because some people can’t afford to be festive. Food on the table trumps lights for the season.

avvooooooo's avatar

Not at all. Everyone has the option to decorate as much or as little as they want. Its an option for a reason.

I lived alone for several years. I didn’t bother to decorate because the vast majority of the time, I’d be the only one there to see it. Plus I wasn’t there for most major holidays. Why bother?

Looking down on people because they don’t choose to celebrate like you do is stupid and egotistical.

nxknxk's avatar

I love decorations but I couldn’t frown on someone for not conforming to the township norm of covering everything in Christmas lights. You’d be amazed at the lengths and heights people will go to with their homes, their trees, their mailboxes and nearby telephone poles…. Sometimes it just looks ridiculous, and I guess I’d rather see someone under-decorate (or refrain from decorating) than over-decorate. Unfortunately the latter is much more common here.

Facade's avatar

Not at all.

cookieman's avatar

As illustrated above, there’s a whole bunch of reasons folks don’t decorate. To assume or judge anything is, IMHO, a mistake.

Ironically, when we first got married (before child), we decorated for every flipping holiday. My wife was really into it.

These past six years, since we adopted our daughter, we’ve done less and less every year. This year we’re down to just Christmas – and even that’s scaled back to a tree and some inside decorations.

ragingloli's avatar

Frown upon?
I AM one of those noble specimen of the human species.

shilolo's avatar

Personally, I applaud them for not succumbing to “neighborhood peer pressure” and also for “going green”. Who in their right mind needs to waste excess energy just for some ridiculous flashing Santa? Is this question sponsored by China and Saudi Arabia?

kheredia's avatar

There’s already more than enough decorations every where you go during the Christmas season. No need to add even more to it. I love Christmas but there comes a point where I’ve had enough of it. Now a days people start decorating for Christmas before Thanksgiving passes. What’s up with that?!

rangerr's avatar

Since everyone is only mentioning Christmas,
The only holiday I make sure our house is decorated for is Halloween. I. Love. Halloween.
I’ll most likely get more into decorating for Christmas and other Holidays when I have kids, but right now, I’d rather have food.

—My grandmother has 10 Christmas trees set up in her house around the Holidays.. annoys the fxck out of me.—-

ragingloli's avatar

(I just realised how awesome it would be to reuse Halloween decoration on Easter, especially zombie themed.)

rangerr's avatar

I always mess up the text.

Likeradar's avatar

How could it possibly be “sad” that some people don’t want to spend their hard earned money on lights and signs and crap to add their two tacky cents to an already over-done holiday season?

@jleslie I know, right? Who woulda thunk that Jews could be frowned upon for not covering our houses and wasting energy on cheesy lights and stuff.

JLeslie's avatar

I mean I am fine if people do it, I like the lights and the trees. I just never realized people even thought or questioned why some people don’t. Who cares? Do they assume the people inside of the house with no decorations are scrooges or somethng?

The_Compassionate_Heretic's avatar

What if someone doesn’t celebrate those holidays?
Should they automatically incur the ire of people that do?

Many people view such displays as idolotry.

nitemer's avatar

I am one of them and I do not believe in Ritualism.

cookieman's avatar

Removed by me

erichw1504's avatar

@Everyone: Thanks for all the great responses. I never really frowned upon people who didn’t decorate, I just always wondered why. And this has opened my eyes.

Thanks again!

mistered's avatar

No. That’s their prerogative.

J0E's avatar

I like to see decorations, but it doesn’t make me mad or anything if they don’t.

The_Compassionate_Heretic's avatar

@erichw1504 You did say it was “sad”. Some people will interpret this as a value judgment.

Likeradar's avatar

@erichw1504 Your wording made it sound like you were judging. You asked why “some people don’t bother to put up one single decoration,” not what the possible reasons could be for people not decorating. It’s ok, just be aware that how you ask a question matters and can make it sound like you’re coming from a different place than you might really be.

avvooooooo's avatar

Not to mention “Is it because they’re lazy”

erichw1504's avatar

Sorry if it came out that way. I was just trying to figure out how people felt about it. It was my mistake about the “don’t bother” part. I shouldn’t assume stuff like that. As for the “lazy” I was just putting out possible reasons.

cjmegatron81's avatar

I’m an Athiest

JLeslie's avatar

@erichw1504 even if you did initially judge, your willingness to ask the question and listen to the answers makes it ok in my mind. It seems from your post that now that you have more information you are more understanding. I don’t like when people get very caught up in how things are asked, I’m just glad people bother to ask instead of keeping judgements to themselves and behind closed doors. Having an open conversation is the answer to most misunderstandings I think.

Hopefully, if you do tend to jump to judgemental conclusions on other things, this might help you not do that in the future.

erichw1504's avatar

@JLeslie Thank you. This has definitely affected how I ask my questions in the future.

elanakin's avatar

Good thread! I love how real the responses were and how the @erichw1504 was able to rethink his position once he was given alternative points of view. IMHO, this is what makes a site like Fluther so wonderful.

JLeslie's avatar

@erichw1504 I actually found how you worded it interesting, because I had no idea that people thought it might be sad or lazy. Here on fluther most are very PC and non-judgemental, so I don’t know if I would have realized there are people who thought as you had, if you had not worded it the way you did. I learned something because of your question. You were being honest in your question, alluding to some of the ideas that come into your mind about the topic.

Austinlad's avatar

Great thread. This kind of civil discourse is what keeps me coming back to Fluther.

evegrimm's avatar

Hmm…well, my mom doesn’t usually put up anything at Christmas, which is sort of odd, because every other house on the street does. I think she gets a kick out of it.

We do put up a (small) Christmas tree inside, and usually some other decorations, but then again, my family’s not too demonstrative in anything, let alone celebrating. (The most my other family members do is put a wreath up.)

I don’t really care one way or the other about Christmas decorations.

mowens's avatar

I don’t decorate my place, but I decorate my parents’ place, and I love doing it.

RareDenver's avatar

We don’t put any decorations up at Christmas, really can’t see the point, maybe if / when we have kids we might.

knitfroggy's avatar

I work retail, so I’m already sick of Christmas! I used to go all out on Christmas and decorsate every room. Now I am doing good to put up the tree and set out a few Snowmen. It’s really sad that my job has changed my feelings about the holidays.

Aethelwine's avatar

@JLeslie Here on fluther most are very PC and non-judgemental

True. Until they see someone wearing sweats in public. ;)

I agree with @shilolo. Such a waste of energy.

bunnygrl's avatar

I don’t have a tree, decorations, anything. I don’t even like to be reminded of christmas (although i’m the one who has to buy and wrap all of the (large) family’s gifts). I also work in retail, so beginning of november till after new year is really difficult for me. I spend all year battling depression, and then for a couple of months at the end of the year it batters me. Christmas was my Grandmothers time of year and everything about it hurts me now. It hurts thats she’s not there, it hurts that it makes me think of her not being there every second of the day. Its just too painful. So I try to put on mental blinkers and block it out till its over.

janbb's avatar

No, since I’m one of them, being Jewish.

hearkat's avatar

I don’t decorate. I was raised Christian, but am now agnostic. I appreciate the theory of kindness and appreciation that Christmas is meant to be, but I despise the commercialism and expectations that it has become.

tinyfaery's avatar


I like to decorate for Giftmas.

And I just want to say, many Jewish families in L.A. decorate for the holidays. And yes, there is such a thing as a Hannukah bush.

janbb's avatar

@tinyfaery Well. L.A.….

No, it’s true – many Jews do decorate and some (ahem, including moi) celebrate Christmas for various reasons. I don’t judge, just saying why I don’t decorate.

Siren's avatar

I enjoy looking at the decorations people display around their homes during holidays and events such as Christmas and Halloween when I am driving home, but personally have not made it a priority, especially if I happen to be too busy that year. In my community, whether you do it or not doesn’t seem to make any difference, even though there are occasionally decoration contests held in the neighborhood. Growing up it was just a fun thing to do, not a community obligation or measure of status.

Can’t speak for other people’s neighborhoods though. Perhaps some people have more neighborhood “peer pressure” than the rest of us to put up something, and are made to feel lazy or inadequate if they don’t participate. That would be sad if it was true for some.

JLeslie's avatar

In my town (about 8,000 people I think) they have a Christmas decoration contest.

Strauss's avatar

@ragingloli Zombie-themed easter decorations! The irony is delicious! Ilove it! Lurve to ya!

gemiwing's avatar

Honestly I don’t care if people don’t want to decorate. It’s popular not to decorate right now anyway.

I just wish I didn’t feel so alone because I like to decorate and people love judging me for it.

YARNLADY's avatar

I love having my house decorated for the Holidays, and I don’t even believe in God. My problem is that I am now physically unable to climb a ladder, and my son and grandson are not interested in helping me. This goes back to one year, I offered to pay my son to do it for me (he needed the money) and he didn’t do it the way I wanted it done, which led to a big argument, so now they won’t do it at all.

The best I can do for myself is to line my front window and my family room with lights, and hang a lighted wreath.

gottamakeart's avatar

The ones that leave them up year-round are the ones that bother me…..........

YARNLADY's avatar

@gottamakeart They’ve made that against the law here because of the fire danger.

ubersiren's avatar

No, why the hell would I? There are people who don’t celebrate “the holidays” at all. It’s not just Christians and Jews up in here. Even if you are a Christian or Jew and choose not to put up decorations, there could be a million different reasons why. It’s decorations.

@tinyfaery: Definitely some outrageous Jewish decorations where I live, too!

JLeslie's avatar

@YARNLADY have a trim the tree party and get neighbors to do it, I’ve been to bunches of parties like that and I like doing it, because I don’t have it at home (not outside fall from the roof decorations, but the tree and nativity scenes indoors). The only negative is you still get stuck taking them down.

aprilsimnel's avatar

My lobby puts up enough decorations that we don’t bother. Well, I don’t bother. One of my roomies likes to string fairy lights around the terrace.

Blondesjon's avatar

I frown on people who worry way too much about what other people are doing.

YARNLADY's avatar

@JLeslie Thanks for the suggestion. I don’t have a problem with inside decorations, it’s the ones I bought to line the edges of my roof and house that I can’t do.

hearkat's avatar

@YARNLADY: I mentioned in the thread about when is it too early to decorate, that my son just started his own business that installs Christmas lights for people. Check your local coupon-clipper mailings to see if anyone offers that out near you.

YARNLADY's avatar

@hearkat They do, but it’s not in my budget – $25.00 and hour and cross your fingers that they have their proper license and insurance.

faye's avatar

I like some inside decorations- just feels right. I have the saddest Charlie Brown tree in the world—fun.

Sarcasm's avatar

@YARNLADY I’m sure you could hire neighborhood kids for less than half of that price. Assuming you trust the youth.

YARNLADY's avatar

@Sarcasm you’re probably right, but my insurance agent says I’m not allowed to have uninsured, non family members work for me.

rangerr's avatar

@YARNLADY Psh. Fight the man.

ratboy's avatar

Jeez killjoys—at least blow up some firecrackers!

tabbycat's avatar

Whether or not a person decides to decorate seems to me a personal matter. I am not bothered in the least by their decision. Likewise, I am not bothered by a person deciding to observe or not to observe a particular religious holiday. I am happy we have the freedom to make those choices for ourselves.

JLeslie's avatar

@YARNLADY wreath on the door, lights on low bushes.

valdasta's avatar

It is not in me to decorate for the holidays. I believe it is because my dad made me feel so stinking guilty about receiving gifts, spending money, etc… On Christmas morning my dad would go upstairs to his bed room while we opened up gifts…I just never felt enthused about decorating.

HOWEVER, I do make an effort, from time to time, to do something. Last year I found a bunch of stringed lights in the basement. I strung them up along the walls of our living room. I didn’t have a whole lot of money, but I brought home a 4’ pre-lighted tree. The kids loved it!

Aside from decorations, I believe it is important for kids to have family traditions. Children look forward to making holidays (or their b-day) special. You are creating memories; they will think back and say, “Those were the good old days.” Decorating the tree, stringing popcorn, hanging decorations, making decorations, singing songs around the piano, going to pick out a tree…This is what makes decorating and other holiday traditions meaningful and vital; you can make it a family activity and tradition.

YARNLADY's avatar

@JLeslie Thank for the ideas, I’ll string the lights where ever I can reach, maybe build a frame for a house just my size, and light it up.

Strauss's avatar

I smile upon them!

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

Not at all.I’m wondering if I should release the mini tree from it’s plastic bag prison this year…hmmmm

NUNYA's avatar

No, because I don’t thing the decorations make the holiday. It is the family that makes the holidays.

JustPlainBarb's avatar

That’s up to them. Maybe they don’t celebrate Christmas for religious reasons, maybe they just don’t want to. Christmas is in our hearts… you don’t have to decorate to celebrate the holidays.

JustPlainBarb's avatar

@Nunya I totally agree with you my friend.

Cruiser's avatar

Not everybody subscribes to the holidays and for many this time of year is an absolute bummer so I would never judge a lack of decorations in any way shape or form.

oreo45's avatar

@ragingloli cool zombi bunnies!

Austinlad's avatar

Why would I care whether other people decorate their houses? It’s their business.

Austinlad's avatar

… just as not decorating* is mine ;-)

* except a small Menorah in the window

oldgranmum's avatar

There are many reasons not to put up decorations… many of which are good. There are many reasons to frown… most of which are not good. The holidays are not about decorating, but about love and understanding… such frowning is contrary to the holiday spirit.

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