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DominicX's avatar

Why do people have such a difficult time ignoring questions they don't like?

Asked by DominicX (28762points) May 12th, 2010

I’m just wondering because I don’t have this mindset, so I don’t exactly understand how it works.

Is it just seeing the question there that enrages you? So many people have spoken of “having to read” certain questions. When do you ever have to read a question here? I don’t really understand that. Do you click on questions you don’t like on purpose or is it just seeing them in the list of questions that bothers you?

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46 Answers

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

Because sometimes (and if I am to understand correctly what situation is prompting this question of yours then this definitely applies) it’s not about one question but a pattern of questions/comments from user(s) that sullies the experience of Fluthering for some.

Sophief's avatar

Because they can’t help themselves, no self control, intrigue, or because they like it really? I don’t know any other reason.

NeroCorvo's avatar

@DominicX Great question.
It would be nice to see the pitchforks put away and this type of thing taken to PM.

Cruiser's avatar

These are the kind of questions I do take a pass on but I had to answer it anyway to let you know that otherwise you would not know this and by the specifics of your question you apparently needed to know this. Now you know.

bob_'s avatar


I mean, um, I don’t know. Some people are like that.

DominicX's avatar


I didn’t ask for the type of questions people ignored, I asked why can’t people just ignore questions they don’t like instead of insisting that they need to be removed?

Cruiser's avatar

@DominicX My apologies for adding specifics you didn’t ask about! I will never ever do it again! My promise to you!

Which brings me to another reason I don’t like to answer questions I don’t particularly like because I will interpret them to a way that better suits my imagination and that sometimes doesn’t sit well with the asker! ;)

DominicX's avatar


My point wasn’t that you added anything, it’s that you didn’t answer the question I asked. I was talking about people who would rather questions they don’t like be removed.

I get it. You’re trying to be funny. But really, I would like a serious actual answer to this question, such as the one Simone provided.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

People are diverse.Some get riled up about stuff other’s don’t give a rat’s ass about.
Because there are bigger things to rant about(for me at least)just not caring is a great option ;)

KatawaGrey's avatar

Because, honestly, I sometimes think a question is interesting at first blush so I click on it to answer it only to see that the details aren’t necessarily what I expected. I might answer it anyway and ignore how badly it was worded but I might also address if it was badly worded or insulting or the like. Sometimes, the conversation degenerates around me and since I am a part of the conversation, I wish to respond to comments.

One could also ask why you chose to ask a question about this rather than ignoring people’s inability to ignore questions they don’t like. ;)

CMaz's avatar

It’s called being human.
Use that information well young Jedi.

DominicX's avatar


Because I want to understand it. I’m not insulting anyone who feels this way. I’m just saying that I don’t feel this way and so I never knew what the mindset was like. I was curious to find out people’s reasons for not ignoring questions they don’t like.

bob_'s avatar

@ChazMaz This is not the question you’re looking for.

Cruiser's avatar

@DominicX Serious answers from me require serious and sincere questions…something I am not getting from your question here. You seem like a smart guy you even figured out rather quickly I was funnin with you so honestly do you really need anyone to tell you why they “have such a difficult time ignoring questions they don’t like?” You have been here infinitely longer than me and by now it should be painfully obvious why and I even think you could tell us quite eloquently why!!

DominicX's avatar


I am being serious when I say that I questions I don’t like don’t bother me. What I mean by that is, I’m not interested in questions about about relationships and dream interpretation and all that. But I never answer those questions. I see them here on the site, but that’s it. They don’t bother me, I don’t complain about them, I don’t want them removed, I don’t feel like I “have” to read them, etc. Some people do care more about questions they don’t like. And since that isn’t how I feel, I wanted to hear other people’s reasons. Is it just seeing the question on the site that is bothersome? Do you want the questions removed? Do you answer them?

That kind of thing. Honestly, if you don’t want to answer my question, then don’t, but other people have and they have given me helpful answers. Something you are not doing.

Cruiser's avatar

@DominicX But I did answer your question! I gave you my reasons why and apparently they are not good enough for you and another reason why I avoid them knowing in advance the asker has an ax to grind and will simply debate just to hear the sound of their own voice. There… you now have 3 of my reasons why.

DominicX's avatar


Where did you give me any reasons why you don’t ignore questions you don’t like?

I see you gave reasons why you do ignore certain questions and the types of questions you ignore, but I didn’t see anything about why you don’t ignore questions, which is what I was asking.

And here, by “ignore” I am referring to not answering it and not being bothered by it or feeling like it needs to be removed.

tinyfaery's avatar

Because they pollute the fluther experience and litter the front pages with drivel.

DominicX's avatar

@tinyfaery Thank you. GA.

chyna's avatar

Certain questions and types of questions that are asked over and over by the same user is just a cry for attention. After so many of them, I feel they should be removed to give the poster the idea to stop posting the same type of question. The example I am thinking of right now is someone keeps asking about dressing up as Boy George. I have flagged that question many times.

gemiwing's avatar

Urgh, I’m guilty of this on days when I’m tired, in pain or PMSing. If I were to post on every question I didn’t like then I would be banned in a New York minute.

Sometimes I click on questions I don’t like because I feel that maybe I can add a viewpoint that might not agree with the OP, but still qualifies as on-topic and would be considered by some a good answer, delving into deeper waters etc.

Sometimes I feel that something needs to be said so the OP knows that perhaps not everyone agrees and the world is a huge place with many different experiences. Sometimes I feel it’s ego that draws me to them- moths and flames I suppose.

I also think most everyone skips 99% of questions they don’t like- but that one percent moves someone to say something. To prove they have a voice, to stand up to past ghosts or sometimes just because the fuse is short that day. I feel part of it is indeed, a numbers game. 1000 people, 100 questions, 99 questions they don’t like but they comment on one that they disagree with- but there are a thousand people so you’ll get some overlap when one questions pushes multiple people’s buttons.

I’m trying harder to avoid questions I know I have too much emotionally invested in. I’m not always successful and I’m not really sure one should be. Whats life without a little passion, eh?

janbb's avatar

I think what no-one is saying here is that over time, one builds up an impression of a person’s personality and issues from the questions they ask (which may be entirely a pseudo-persona, of course.) As a hypothetical example, if a person were to consistently complain that their wife beats them and then talk in other threads about their idyllic family life, members of the collective get frustrated with that person and yet may continue to answer their questions in order to either try to help that person see the light or just to vent their frustration. That’s my 2 cents on the issue, anyway.

Cruiser's avatar

@DominicX My first reply illustrated why I broke my Cardinal Rule of usually “ignoring” these types of questions you referred to is all because you asked for an answer so that prompted my reply and thusly causing me to “not ignore” the question I would have normally ignored. Sort of a catch 22!

My second reply was clearly a reply to your reply to me and it would be rude of me to not offer you a polite a reply. Again another Catch 22 situation since I want to ignore all of this but to all of a sudden to ignore your reply would be rude now wouldn’t it?

And my 3rd reply illustrates why I really do have a difficult time avoiding these types of questions because the “asker” has an even harder time ignoring me and keeps asking me things!! ;D

Cruiser's avatar

@lucillelucillelucille With you anytime!! KYA!

Berserker's avatar

It’s human nature to confront what you don’t like, no matter the level of magnitude it may bear.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@Cruiser-You would scream like a little girl—lol!—

Cruiser's avatar

@lucillelucillelucille We have traveled this well worn path and I see you are still as delusional as ever!! PM me if you insist to prevent further embarrassment to your image and reputation here! ;-))

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@Cruiser-Be patient! Someday the sense I knocked out of you will return in time for round;)

jbfletcherfan's avatar

@janbb & @chyna I totally agree with you. One certain user here asks the same type questions over & over again. There’s never an end to it. I’m tired of her & her questions. I’ve learned to just delete them. I used to read them & get my BP going, but I just wipe them out anymore. I would love to see it stopped.

stranger_in_a_strange_land's avatar

I don’t really understand why people can’t simply ignore questions they don’t like. It seems that some of the questions many didn’t like are the type that I like to answer. This is a community, not everyone has the same tastes.

chels's avatar

Could be a few things:

They like drama.
They have nothing better to do.
To be a smartass.
Sometimes they’re just in a bad mood and feel like answering even if it turns out to be rude or obnoxious.
Just because they feel like it.

YARNLADY's avatar

If I ignore questions I don’t like, how will the OP know they have to stop asking them?

jbfletcherfan's avatar

@YARNLADY Good point. The squeeky wheel, & all that…......

DominicX's avatar


But see, that’s the thing. Ignoring them isn’t an option for people who feel this way. You can’t ignore the questions because then you wouldn’t be able to tell them to stop asking them. You want them to stop asking them because you can’t ignore them.

YARNLADY's avatar

@DominicX Now, that makes sense, after I read it two or three times, but you see if they don’t know to stop, the problem just escalates until the entire site is full of garbage and nobody wants that. Believe me, I’ve seen it happen before.

Aethelwine's avatar

I have no problem ignoring questions I don’t like. I do it all the time. In fact, I only look at maybe 20% of the questions lately, but there’s just something about a train wreck.

Silhouette's avatar

I know this will come as a huge shock to someone like you, young, smart, friendly and easy to get along with but, hang on to your hat, some people like to bitch, they actually look for stuff to whine about.

DominicX's avatar

@Silhouette :)

Heh. I’m well aware that people do that. It’s unfortunate that people feel like they need a problem to complain about at all times. Can’t you just be satisfied with nothing wrong at the moment? Why do you go looking for something wrong?

I’ve come across it too many times.

Silhouette's avatar

@DominicX I don’t get it either, life is way too short and I don’t see the fun in living that way.

Jeruba's avatar

I’m having a really hard time right now with this one. Nothing I’d like to post in response is legal.

Aethelwine's avatar

@Jeruba I played nice. ;)

FutureMemory's avatar

Jeruba would have a field day with that question.

Buttonstc's avatar


Well by the time I’m reading this, evidently it’s been removed but there was enough info left for me to figure out someone wanted to know the capitol of Texas.

And this brings me to the logical Q of why the guidelines prohibit any of us from dropping them a clue that Google exists and they don’t even have to even form a complete sentence or use capital letters there.

Simply inputting “texas capitol” into G gets them much faster results than Fluther ever could.

So why are we forbidden from imparting this wisdom to them. Is just removing their Q supposed to somehow be superior? I really don’t get it.

Can anyone drop me a clue?

Sorry, Dom. Not trying to derail your thread or anything but this is just bugging me tonight.

And to get back to the Q you posed, I have no difficulty at all ignoring Q I find tedious. Life is too short to get my knickers in a knot over someone else’s sex obsession ( or teeny bopper relationship stuff or whatever.) I just pass it by and go on my merry way.

But I would venture to guess that others are bothered by the excess detritus that seems to clutter up the site in waves from time to time. How many NSFW questions does it take before the barfing point is reached?

Not everyone can be as sanguine about it all the time.
That’s my best guess.

bob_'s avatar

@Buttonstc This is Texas’ capitol. This is Texas’ capital.

Buttonstc's avatar

Thank you, bob. I had a hunch as I was typing that it would come back to bite me in the butt somehow :)

Unfortunately, I was too far into the post to abandon all of which I had previously typed to go look it up.

It’s not an excuse, but it is the reason. When one is on iPhone it’s not quite like computer. If you leave to open up another page like Google to research the proper spelling, whatever you’ve typed into your unposted answer usually disappears.

I was planning to post it so it wouldn’t disappear, and then dash over to G and come back to edit it, if wrong.

But you’re quicker than I.

You’re a better man than I am , Gunga Din. (to borrow from Kipling)

And besides that, it’s quarter after midnight where I’m lying in bed typing on my iPhone. I ain’t about to drag out my laptop and fire it up just so i can be OCD about spelling frequently conflated words, so “eat my shorts” ( to borrow from Bart Simpson)


Now, go and make ME a sandwich for a change.

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