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Isabella9's avatar

Should I Apologize to ex Boyfriend?

Asked by Isabella9 (3points) May 23rd, 2010

Hi, My ex boyfriend wrote: “Happy birthday!” in a text to me on my birthday five months after we broke up. That day I was at that time of the month, had just finished an exam with no sleep or food. When I saw his message I was happy but nervous and then I wrote it was a nice suprise to hear from him. Then he just said “ok, take care then”. Then I wrote: “Why did you contact me?” because I wanted to know what he was thinking. Then he wrote: “dont be upset.” So I called him and said I wasn’t upset. Then I said I thought people weren’t supposed to make contact after a break up. I feel really bad about saying this. He then said angrily that he promised me he’d never contact me again. Because I had pms and was tired and stressed I reacted badly because I was defensive. Do you think I should apoligize?

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7 Answers

jrpowell's avatar

Yes, apologize. He actually let you dig your hole deeper than I would have. I would have ignored you after, “Why did you contact me?”.

Your_Majesty's avatar

If you broke up and ended up as his friend,then yes you must apologize. But,to get angry simply because of your curiosity is unnecessary.

wonderingwhy's avatar

It really depends on whether or not you place any value on the relationship at this point. If you do, yes, apologize. Otherwise, while it would still be polite and nice of you to do so it may imply a greater meaning than you desire – causing needless drama.

Kayak8's avatar

From the tenor of your question, it sounds like your birthday and the subsequent events may have also been some time ago . . . There is a point after which your apology can be stirring things up further. You asked for no contact and now you have it. What started as a simple text, you escalated to a phone call. If you must apologize to clear YOUR mind, do it in a card that requires no response from him (not a text or call). If it that isn’t satisfactory (because you want a response), you are the source of the drama.

john65pennington's avatar

Big 10–4 here. be thankful he thought enough about you to contact you in the first place.

No text message…........make the call. he still cares for you or he would not have texted you in the first place. you made a boo boo mistake.

Siren's avatar

I think you just put him on the defensive unknowingly. If you want to apologize, you can do so and then just change the subject to something in the news, etc. so he sees that you truly don’t believe (if you don’t) that people who break up should not make contact again.

If you still want to be his friend, that is.

perspicacious's avatar

I think you should grow up. If someone such as a former boyfriend says happy birthday, all you need say is thanks.

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