Social Question

whatnot's avatar

What secret thought have you been pondering lately that you've not shared with anyone?

Asked by whatnot (589points) July 10th, 2010

Now, please don’t be a smart booty and say “If I share, then it won’t be a secret. <wink-n-smile>

This thought could be about anything under the sun, about you or about someone else.

What has kept you from sharing it (assuming it’s something share-worthy but not ready to be shared)? How could this thought affect you and/or others if you shared it with your S/O, closest friends, etc.? What would it take for you to act on the thought, if it’s about something you’d like to do?

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

46 Answers

DrasticDreamer's avatar

I haven’t shared it because it wouldn’t do any good or make a difference. That’s all I’m saying.

MissA's avatar

I don’t feel anonymous here anymore. Just because I can’t ‘see’ you, doesn’t mean I want you to hear me naked.

jazmina88's avatar

wow….we all have the most inner, that we dare not let speak out…....
glad i’m not the only one.

Ron_C's avatar

Why would I tell you? The purpose of a “secret thought” is to be a secret. You better find a different question.

whatnot's avatar

^^ Smart booty alert!! Eh hm, if ya don’t like the question, then don’t answer it!

Ron_C's avatar

@whatnot I wrote that in lieu of flagging it. I think that is boarders on offensive especially if someone answers it truthfully. After all, we are not really anonymous here. Anybody with a little data mining can figure out who we are.

Seek's avatar

I almost answered this. Almost.

Even had it all typed out.

It’s kind of funny how the psychology of this site works – if @MissA or @DrasticDreamer or @Zenele or another regular would have posted it, I probably would have felt comfortable answering it. I’d have felt that they were looking to be supportive.

Because the asker is a noob – the question comes off as threatening and predatory.

whatnot's avatar

@Ron_C – Wow. <shakes head and ignores>

Neizvestnaya's avatar

Secret thought: Wondering about the mechanics at work, if when they fixed my car did they take a peek into my trunk to see what was in there.

whatnot's avatar

@Seek_Kolinahr – Ouch. Okay. But why answer anything if you don’t like the question?

rpm_pseud0name's avatar

I have an application for Pixar Studios that I haven’t sent in & none of my family/friends know about it or the stress it has been causing me. For if I get it, I would have to move very far away. Right now I am a chicken shit & terrified about entering the world of the film making giants. I am comfortable hangin’ with the little guys.

Seek's avatar


Why ask the question if you don’t want people to discuss it?

MissA's avatar

@rpmpseudonym Okay…now you’ve said it…now, you can bring about change. How may we be of help to you, if you in fact want it? You sound like a pile of talent who’s afraid to take that important step. I wouldn’t call that ‘chicken shit’...I would call that natural.

whatnot's avatar

@Seek_Kolinahr – I’d rather not get caught up in discussing the finer points of good vs. not-so-good questions. My take is this: If one doesn’t like a question, don’t answer it or flag it if doesn’t meet Fluther guidelines.

Any hoo… My secret thought I’ve been pondering: I’ve been thinking about how completely frustrated I am with my current situation. I’ve been thinking about some drastic things I can do to change my situation. I’ve been wondering what it would be like if I acted upon some of those drastic things – If my life would be significantly better or worse or the same.

I haven’t shared the secret ponderings with my S/O because I don’t want my S/O to make a reactive decision based upon what I’m thinking. I want my S/O to make autonomous decisions, to decide personal goals and desires for the future. I’m afraid that if I share my specific ponderings with my S/O, then I will be the one making the decision about our relationship instead of both of us making autonomous decisions and acting accordingly. For me to act upon my secret ponderings, I would need to sit with my thoughts, to see which are reactionary and which thoughts are conducive to not only taking care of myself, but also for allowing the relationship with my S/O to gently unfold.

rpm_pseud0name's avatar

@MissA I would need @whatnot‘s permission first, if we were to start discussing in this post about how I can set this thought in action.

Seek's avatar


I’m just saying that there are better ways to introduce yourself to the community than demanding they divulge their most intimate secrets or GTFO.

MissA's avatar

@rpmpseudonym Start your own thread…if you care to.

Seaofclouds's avatar

I’ll bite…

My secret is that my wrist is really messed up and I am not telling anyone about it because I don’t want them to worry about it or tell me not to take my upcoming trip. I have to wear a brace practically 24/7 and will most likely require surgery. My doctor would schedule the surgery now if I asked him to, but instead I’m putting it off for a while. I am going to visit family in about a week and I’ll be gone for 3 weeks, then a few weeks after that my husband is suppose to come home for R&R. I’d rather wait until after all of this to have surgery on my wrist.

rpm_pseud0name's avatar

@MissA I probably will in a few days (post Q.), for I have a couple technical questions about the resume, but I want to collect myself before I begin.

MissA's avatar

@rpmpseudonym Happy Collecting…and, good luck.

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

@whatnot you seem to have a concern on which you would like feedback.

I suggest you present it to the community in a fresh thread and try and be as clear as possible about what impact your decision would have on your relationship and why you can’t consult your significant other.

MissA's avatar

@Dr_Lawrence That is, in fact, a good answer, sir.

Axemusica's avatar

It’s no secret that I’ve been planning world domination….

MissA's avatar

@Axemusica And, what denominations do you plan to use in your non-secretive planning? Is this something we should be concerned about?

whatnot's avatar

@Dr_Lawrence – Thank you for the suggestion. I didn’t (and don’t) want to name the specifics about the concern. I purposely posted this question because I am curious to see how other people process their secret thoughts.

MissA's avatar

@Axemusica Am I better off staying on the island and burning the bridges…or, biking off and getting as far away as possible. Oh, wait! What am I running away from?

MissA's avatar

@whatnot I don’t know how asking that question can actually help you. Explain. You are not coming forth with what you’re asking of other people, it seems.

Pandora's avatar

How do I quite smoking for good and not put on any weight? I’ve tried it several times and even exercised till I dropped and no matter what I still put on weight once I quite smoking. I would eventually panic and go back to smoking.
So I have to find a way to make it stick. I really would enjoy a smoke free life, but when I put on weight I feel tired all the time. I feel healther on cigs.
Wish I could figure out a way.
I haven’t shared it with anyone because I don’t want people to bug me about it unless they have a solid way of making this work for me.

filmfann's avatar

My secret thought:
Oscar Grant had already done two stints in prison, including one for gun possession. He was arrested twice that night, and was going to end up back in jail. His family’s $1.5 million settlement with BART probably gives them far more money than he would have in life. His death also spared his family the heartache of seeing him spending most of his life in prison.
The local retailers boarding up their windows, and posting pictures of Grant was asking for trouble. It was practically an invitation to loot.
I think everyone thinks this, but no one says it because it comes off as racist, but it’s the truth.

ipso's avatar

My friend’s wife has conveniently been showing some “kryptonite” (a really hot chick’s “plumber’s butt” – a thong showing, low cut Levis, on a tight ass) and I know I deserve to implode and burn in hell, but I’m still fantasizing mad about it, six ways from Sunday.

And she knows it.

mponochie's avatar

The response to this question is one of the things that I find frustrating about this site and life in general. What is wrong with posing any question (the only way to learn is to ask). Why tear a person down for asking a question…I was always taught there is no such thing as a bad question, only a bad answer (well proven here).
It further perplexes me that someone responded they were prepared to answer until they saw other responses than goes on to tear apart the question asker. What’s wrong with individualism. All to often here, answers fall in sync with previous responses, especially when it comes to controversial matters….I knew deep down we do not all think alike (or the world would be far more harmonious) so why is that responses here always seem to be of like minds….PLEASE.
I can’t agree more with @whatnot when he states, “If one doesn’t like a question, don’t answer it or flag it if doesn’t meet Fluther guidelines”.
As for me I didn’t answer this question because I was too much of a coward to share my current secret thought for fear of being ridiculed…thanks for proving me right.

kellylet's avatar

I have debt and an almost crippling amount of anxiety about it. Hopefully I will have the ability to remedy this soon but even just thinking about it makes me nauseous. I don’t know anyone on Fluther & I am still nervous about writing about it.

augustlan's avatar

@kellylet I know just about everyone here, but haven’t had a chance to interact with you yet. Just wanted to let you know that I’m in the same (financial) boat as you. We’re not alone, either… I know many other jellies are experiencing similar problems right now. :(

Axemusica's avatar

All seriousness in the destruction of the world aside, @ipso I second that. One of my good friend’s, his wife, and I too should implode and burn. Sometimes I act like she’s not there when she really is, lol. I don’t think she knows though, but I did notice she colored her hair and he didn’t. I was metaphysically punching myself in the brain, when she said, ”[My Name] noticed!” and the look he gave me.

BoBo1946's avatar

I’ll never tell! personal!

Seek's avatar


For the record – my answer stated I erased my answer after I saw that the asker was not a long term user.

The fact that so many other long-time users felt the same way as I did about this question does say something because we do all think with individual minds.

Think of it this way – if someone walked up to you randomly on the street and asked you if you enjoy anal sex, what would be your reaction? Wouldn’t that reaction be different than if your best friend had asked the same thing?

SmashTheState's avatar

“What the hell is that bumpy nodule under my nutsack? Was that there before? Christ, I hope it’s not a wart.”

Facade's avatar

I know he either 1) is cheating on her with one or more of his “friends” or 2) he’s a fucking incestuous pervert. Either way, he should stay far away from me for his own safety.

Seek's avatar

@SmashTheState Don’t know. Haven’t had the opportunity. ^_^

SmashTheState's avatar

Just a little update. I see I answered this question in July of 2010, and mentioned offhandedly the little nodule I’d felt in my scrotum. Well, I spent a week in hospital a couple of months ago, because it turns out that little nodule was an abscess and after a 6-day train ride sitting in the same position, it began growing rapidly. It was the size of my fist when they lanced it at the hospital and sent me home… without antibiotics. By the next day my scrotum had doubled in size, and in the time it took me to get back to the hospital emergency room, the infection had spread through my whole groin and into my thighs. The infection was so bad that they were worried about Fournier’s Gangrene, which has only a 30% survival rate for diabetics.

Fortunately, after five days in the hospital on an antibiotic IV drip and an ocean of saline, it cleared up and I only had to spend two weeks having nurses pack the open wound daily to keep it from healing until all the pus had drained.

Let this be a lesson to you at my expense: if you feel a little lump where there shouldn’t be a lump, don’t wait for it to become a medical emergency before you get it checked.

augustlan's avatar

@SmashTheState Crap, I don’t even have man parts and that made me squirm. Ouch! Glad you’re all better.

Answer this question




to answer.
Your answer will be saved while you login or join.

Have a question? Ask Fluther!

What do you know more about?
Knowledge Networking @ Fluther