Social Question

silvermoon's avatar

How long after starting to see someone should/do you consider them as being bf/gf?

Asked by silvermoon (753points) July 31st, 2010

I have been out with a guy a few times since mid June this year however knowning him since December last year (but not in person). How long after starting to see him should/do I consider him to be my boyfriend?

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15 Answers

Frenchfry's avatar

When you ask them if they would like to be…

nailpolishfanatic's avatar

I have never had one, so I don’t know, I guess you could just ask them or if you guys have gotten really close….

downtide's avatar

I agree, you should ask them and they should say yes before you make an assumption.

Scooby's avatar

Usually after the first date & they wanna continue with some more.. I make it a rule that if I want to date someone then I let it be known I consider us to be BF/GF even if we only date say once a month.. You can have lots of friends, just be sure to put your cards on the table as to how you would like any particular friendship to go….. ;-)

le_inferno's avatar

You can’t be certain unless you have a conversation about it.

I was in this same limbo with my current boyfriend for a few months; he went to New Zealand for a semester starting in July, so I think we weren’t sure what we wanted to do about that. Finally I addressed the elephant in the room, and we decided to make it official. He’s been away a few days shy of a month, 3.5 more to go :|

Neizvestnaya's avatar

You two have got to have The Talk. If you like this guy well enough to where you think you’d like him to be a bf you introduce to friends and family then ask him how he sees the two of you, couple wise. You can ask, “do you see us as hanging out buddies, dating around, dating just each other? I’d like to date just you, what do you think about dating just me?”

Aster's avatar

For me, an old dinosaur on fluther, I always just “knew” by things he’d say and how often he’d call. If they want you exclusively THEY’LL TELL YOU. lol If a guy just kept taking me out but didn’t say certain things I’d always get a new BF. I don’t know why.

mollypop51797's avatar

What happened to asking? Going steady? oops, too old for 2010 eh?

wundayatta's avatar

36 days after initial intimacy.

It says so in Robert’s Rules of Order.

evandad's avatar

Three days

silvermoon's avatar

@evandad Can I ask why you would suggest 3 days? You mean 3 days solid or 3 dates?

perspicacious's avatar

If you have to ask this question, it’s not yet time. You’ve only had a few dates in seven weeks or so.

SVTSuzie's avatar

When you both look forward to seeing each other.

kirkratliff's avatar

For me it’s when I’ve been spending (and enjoying) most of my time with her and don’t want to see another girl. It’s something you have to be patient about sometimes, but if you feel right about then go for it!

I just saw this question on another sight, too. These guys have some good opinions on the topic http://www.leftos.com/forum/view/913

silvermoon's avatar

@kirkratliff Thanks for that, i’ll check it out :)

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