Social Question

Unbroken's avatar

To all the singles out there?

Asked by Unbroken (10262 points ) November 6th, 2012

How many of you men and women avoid movies for a first date and regret it when you give in?

I have learned that first dates and movies go hand in hand with groping and as much pda as you will allow and they still push for more. Regardless of age class race or personality.
Am I the only one who finds this to be a huge turn off? Women, how do you handle the situation gracefully and firmly? How many times have you just given up and walked out? Men, do you feel pressured to behave this way, is there more then just horniness involved in your thought process?

I ask this because I went on an impromptu impulse date with this mid 30 professional who managed to pull off 4 hours of engaging thoughtful and enjoyable conversation, was respectful and to a person who is categorically hunting for red flags literally had none, other then he wasn’t knee quivering sexy. So after hesitation I agreed. But at the movie theater I would have classified him as among the ranks of a teenager. He talked me into staying the rest of the movie but I told him I don’t want to see him until the weekend.
He called me yesterday to say if I changed my mind he was free all week. I am admittedly a commitmentphobe. But this guy seems way to needy for me and I still am put off by his behavoir, but otherwise I was really impressed. Is there some sort of movie clause that exempts his actions?

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16 Answers

janbb's avatar

Wow! I thought that sort of behavior went out at age 16! I almost had my first movie date in over 40 years but the movie was sold out so we went out for dessert instead. If this guy seems good, I would talk to him about his behavior and how it affected you before writing him off.

chyna's avatar

I’m confused. Did he grope you at the movies or just ask you to a movie and you think he is going to grope you?

josie's avatar

What are you talking about.
Did you have a good time or not. If not, don’t go out again. If so, give it another try.
Or are you just trying to find something to complain about because you are uncomfortable in your own skin and are trying to blame him for it.
Figure that out and get back.

Coloma's avatar

I have never been groped at a movie and I am 52. Are you stuck in some 1950’s time warp? lol
We need more of the groping, er, gripping details.

Unbroken's avatar

Haha @janbb I wish. I did talk to him after the movie and he said he really felt a physical chemistry, i mentioned all the promises he made and he said he would say anything to get in my pants. But if we were messing around he wanted it to be monogamous, which isn’t my problem I want to apply the brakes. And points for honesty after the fact but he has me on edge with his approach I haven’t decided I want to have sex with him.
@chyna I went to the movie with him, he asked to hold my hand and then he swooped in for a kiss and tried repeatedly, grabbed my boob and tried to make my hand accidently touch his penis and tried to slide his hand up my skirt. At first I played it off, then told him no, then he invited me to his place or mine, then made numerous commitment pledges. At one point I got up to leave and he told me he would behave and enjoyed just having someone to watch a movie with. We agreed we were going home alone and I didn’t want to hear from him til the weekend. He was ok for awhile. Then started again, and so I stood up and he followed me apologizing and just said we should stand for a while and cool off.
But pretty soon he was trying to slip his hands under my clothes and asked if I would suck his dick.
Longest movie ever. And then out of the movie he was a perfect gentlemen again. He drove me to my car, across the parking lot, and while it warmed up, he had auto start, we talked for another hour and a half, he kept his hands to himself.

Unbroken's avatar

So @josie I did have a good time and the worst time I have had all at once. I will be the first to admit I have issues, but his behavoir was appalling and exemplary al at once. And I like making the first move and I haven’t in years had sex with a guy in the first night, because you are hardly able to judge them by first meeting.

@Coloma I wish

jca's avatar

@rosehips: How old are you and how old is he? I am surprised he wanted oral sex in a public place.

Unbroken's avatar

26. Me too. He said he got of a relationship of 5 years in May and was used to sex every day to nothing.

Not sure that is a defense though. I have been celibate longer and am quite lusty given the right person.

janbb's avatar

I am changing my opinion. That sounds like really unpleasant behavior and I think I would ditch him now. That guy has problems. He was way out of line.

Coloma's avatar

@rosehips Really? He actually SAID that to you?!!!
So, the guy tells you he was used to having sex every day and then proceeds to act like a molesting creep all through the movie. Seriously!

Don’t let the “perfect gentleman” side of him fool you, you already got a taste of what he becomes in a dark movie theater.
I mean, c’mon…the guy has NO shame, groping you, asking for a blowjob in a movie theater…are you really up to managing a dog like him?
Jeez…he can’t spend more than a few minutes in a sit/stay position without wanting to hump your leg.
Bad dog! Dump him.

chyna's avatar

There is no way in hell that I would see that guy again. He has no respect for women in general by trying to grope you and continuing after you said no. And to ask for a blow job in a movie of someone he doesn’t even know? I would have left and never talked to him again.

SpatzieLover's avatar

Honestly, if a guy on a first date did that to me, I’d punch him in the eye and walk out.
No Joke!

FutureMemory's avatar

Wow. This guy is a real creep. He doesn’t deserve any more of your time, he blew (hehe) his chances with such atrocious behavior. I would never be so presumptuous on a first date, sheesh!!!!

chyna's avatar

So did you see him again?

Coloma's avatar

^^^^ Oh no…he probably has her chained to a wall in a garage or something. lol

FutureMemory's avatar

Dang, Coloma (you go girl).

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