Have you ever gotten a private message from another user on Fluther that was rather unpleasant?

If it’s really offensive, contact the mods. Otherwise, delete and ignore. It can be unnerving.
If they contact you again like this, tell them not to, then ask the mods to step in and prevent it.

I’m sorry that someone has been so unpleasant to you, I hope you work this out.

Yes, several times. It’s best to ignore these types of messages unless they are harassing you. Contact the mods if it becomes a problem.

You are so sweet. I’d kick them for you if I could.

Aside from some weird trolling-type messages way back, there’s only been one PM that was really hostile, and I didn’t answer it. I’d have called upon the mods if there’d been a persistent problem.

As for not having a blocking option, I believe the answer to that is the same as the answer to a lot of other things, namely, that development on the site ended when Ben and Andrew moved on. A block feature (for posts rather than PMs) was at the top of my wish list 5 or 6 years ago, but I guess it wasn’t a priority. By now we just have to be satisfied with what we’ve got, which I still think is balanced in our favor. The fluthergods did a great job in the first place, and the mods stll run a pretty clean shop.

I don’t remember ever having received an unpleasant private message on Fluther. I just scanned back through my years and years of message history, and didn’t notice any. They’re pretty much all very friendly.

Sure. I usually ignore it.

Never. I would never send one.
I did get some troll stuff a while back and just ignored it.

I suppose if it was really bad I’d tell the mods.

Actually I like when I see my “Messages for You” link in bold type. It’s like a little morning surprise.

Years ago when first joining. None in recent memory.

No, I’ve never received a truly awful PM. As others have said, tell the mods. Some have suggested waiting for another message or until a pattern develops. I wouldn’t wait. I would tell them now. You don’t need to let it escalate. One is too many.

I know this happens to some members here. It’s very sad.

I did, only once at which I am surprised at hearing the other stories. I wish there was a block facility. I told the moderators at the time and they told her to stop harassing me. She eventually apologized. It was bullying actually. Other than that I’ve only had supportive, caring, friendship messages.

egad

Fluther is the worst. I’ve never even had the mods remove an offensive POST against me except for about 14 when I first joined.. Why would they care about PM’s?

Hate can be disturbing but it only reinforces the ‘consider the source’ motif. Nothing reinforces one’s position or debunks the other worst than the references to excrement and other shock-value insults— I wish there were a way to expose them to other Fluther users.

When I first joined Fluther there was a barrage of posts where people were accusing me of not being a real user. Eventually those remarks were moderated but I wish the mods let them stand. Sometimes, people’s deeds and comments need permanent exposure.

No, that shit will no doubt go on behind my back which is fine, gives them something to do bless

But @Yellowdog, this Q is about PMs, which are different from public posts. Have you had a problem with PMs?

Yes—maybe I wasn’t clear. Users will make much worse insults in private. Some have an obsession with feces and “excrement sandwiches” and similar references. I wish there were a way to expose these remarks when people say them. What people say in private is far worse than what they typically post.

I consider the source and it only serves to emphasize the insanity of people with opposing views To be fair, however, there are many more reasonable and even supportive users, even among they who have opposing views.

I hope you reported them, it’s likely that they are people who send that kind of abuse to others as well. I have been fortunate in that I have never received abusive PMs, just angry and/or slightly demeaning ones.
I’m sorry you had to put up with that.

I have only ever received one slightly unpleasant message which I ignored.

No.
I don’t get many PMs, but they are usually friendly/helpful etc.
I think I got one once that was not particularly friendly, but not hateful or shitty or anything.
And even if I got a bad one, I really would not give a shit.
I have seen plenty worse than an insult on a Q and A site.

I remember once years ago I was getting harrassing PMs from someone or other. I honestly can’t remember if it was this site or another. The person was giving me crap about an answer and kept pushing the debate on PM. I told him (or her) that if they PMed me again that I would cut and paste the entire PM conversation and post it. That shut them up.

^^I did have one like that. This person simply could not accept my point of view. They don’t post here anymore so I could care less.

No, I never have. Am I doing something wrong here?

^Now you have.

A few. Recently a new user asked me to clarify a comment that I and another user had made on her posts. I did, in a friendly manner, and she just blew up. Well. You ASKED me!

Thanks @chyna I feel so…........ relieved and wanted?