Social Question

Likeradar's avatar

What effect has your level of attractiveness/beauty had on your life?

Asked by Likeradar (19583points) November 4th, 2009

A comment in the 3 months salary for an engagement ring question got me thinking- How has how you look effected your life? Do you feel like you’re at an advantage or disadvantage based on your looks? How? Why?

let’s be nice. I’m sure some of you are remarkably physically gorgeous by conventional standards and it’s ok to acknowledge it. :)

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20 Answers

faye's avatar

i think acceptance from strangers, teachers, patients, etc has always been easier

The_Compassionate_Heretic's avatar

Attractive people definitely have an advantage.
If those advantages were offered to me, I don’t think I’d feel good about it if I exploited that opportunity.
It’s better to get by on your wits because physical attractiveness is a short lived phenomenon and when that goes, what do you have to fall back on?

trailsillustrated's avatar

it has saved my life . it really has. it enabled me to hook up with somebody that helped me get treatment, get better, and have enough money to never work again, and to re-connect with my family.

poisonedantidote's avatar

At an advantage. im no looker, and im aware of it. this has allowed me to focus on other things.

while my looks are below average, i have had a lot of practice at getting in touch with my self and devloping other ways of being attractive.

i know that my height and size is an advantage for me, and i play on it and milk it for everything its worth. people tend to look at me and see a pillow. the big friendly giant card, works a charm.

Dog's avatar

Beauty comes as much from within as outer appearance. I think think inner beauty actually gets more benefits in the long run. Sure outer beauty will open doors and garner attention, but if there is no inner beauty to back it up the attention is fleeting.

Just my opinion of course from my perspective on life.

DominicX's avatar

I don’t really know. I haven’t lived as long as many of the people here, so I don’t have that much experience to draw on. Additionally, I can’t tell how others treat me because of my looks; maybe it has more effect than I think. I’ve always thought of myself as pretty good-looking and I’ve had that verified by plenty of people. (You said it was okay to admit that, so that’s what I’m doing). I certainly don’t let it determine everything I do in life; it’s just a perk on the side. I’m not sure what effect it’s really had on my life other than cause me to not worry about my looks as much as maybe some others do and make me feel good every now and then when someone compliments me.

Facade's avatar

I’d say both. It has the obvious advantages. And a disadvantage which I probably bring upon myself is that if I decide to go out w/o makeup on, I get looked at weird like “whoa, you look different.” Those kinds of comments aren’t great at all. So if I’m leaving the house, my face is done (except for when I go to yoga). Speaking of yoga, I was given a compliment when I was sweaty and with no makeup on. That may seem like no big deal, but it was a great confidence booster :)
It’s difficult to have to keep up appearances at all times, not to mention time consuming. I would love to be a low-maintenance person.

Edited to say: It also makes me pretty self-conscious in an “oh my goodness, what are people staring at!?” kind of way…

aprilsimnel's avatar

I can’t really answer. I was sort of ordinary-looking up until a year or so ago. I’m only coming into my mature beauty now.

I’ll let you all know as soon as anything exciting happens.

YARNLADY's avatar

I always thought my sister was the “good looking” one of the two of us, so I never gave ‘looks’ much thought. I barely notice ‘looks’ myself. I think it has made my life much easier – and cheaper – never having to worry about wearing make up or how to dress or anything. I am one of those people who truly doesn’t have a clue.

rangerr's avatar

If I wasn’t attractive to the person who changed my life, I don’t know if I’d still be here today.

smack's avatar

i’ve always thought that if i was prettier, my life would be easier. it is clear that to a certain extent, attractive people get what they want more often.

i’ve definitely noticed that since i got my braces off and lost weight that more people want to be around me. i don’t know if it’s because i felt better about myself, so therefore my self-confidence made me a more likable person – or if it’s because people simply want to be around more-attractive people. we will never know.

drdoombot's avatar

People tell me I’m quite handsome; I’ve had more than one girlfriend tell me my best feature is my face. But I don’t feel I act like a good-looking person. I’m bookish and into nerdy things. I feel I’m no good in many social situations and I usually get nervous and shy around new people, particularly women.

I’m not a particularly confident person, so if I didn’t have my good looks going for me, I probably would have been even less confident.

Jude's avatar

For me, I look quite young for my age. I’m 37 and most people think that I look 25. Sometimes, when you want to be taken more seriously by an older crowd, it’s tough (we’re talking when first meeting people who are in my age group and older). When talking to people, though, they soon find out that I’m quite mature. I finally bring up my age, and they’re surprised.

Now, the good thing with is, is that I look 25. =) I get hit on by younger guys in their 20’s. Although, I’m flattered, it’s not what I want. No, sir.

When people say that I’m cute/pretty, hey, I’m flattered. It’s a bit of a confidence booster. But, I’d rather that they’d like me more for what’s on the inside (sounds corny, but, it’s true). Good looks can only get you so far. A smart noggin and beautiful heart; now, that’s lovely.

Likeradar's avatar

I’ll answer my own question. :)
I’ve always been told I’m very pretty, and I think I’m decent looking but not a knockout or anything. I don’t dress up much, don’t regularly do my hair, and I don’t even carry a compact so I sure don’t play my looks up. I’m also very tall for a girl and actually fairly tall for a guy. It has it’s advantages. I get noticed, and my height leads people to take me seriously when I enter a room.
But the disadvantage is that I have to work hard at getting people to see me as more than a pretty face. One of the most hurtful things I’ve experienced was from a relative- after a family reunion an aunt sent out an email: “It’s so nice to see that X has gotten his doctorate, Z is engaged and successful at his career, Y is on the varsity team, and Likeradar looked beautiful as always.” Fuck you.
So, in some ways it’s nice to be considered good looking, but I think I’d like being considered average more.

fireinthepriory's avatar

I would call myself very cute (on a good day), but not beautiful, per se… I can make myself “beautiful” if I put some effort in, but on a normal day I fall into the cute category. I’m short, I have a round face, a curly bob… anyway, you get the picture. I think it comes in handy, in my line of work. I’ve done a lot of biological research in Alaska, and people are MUCH more likely to let a cute young woman throw traps in the lake in their backyard than they would be if I were an adult man. Hell, cute is probably even better than stunningly gorgeous would be since men don’t try to sleep with me, and women aren’t put off (as they can be by very beautiful women), but everyone finds me endearing and lets me onto their property. Haven’t really thought about it further than that!

DominicX's avatar

@Likeradar

Ha. That sucks. I remember someone said something like that to me on the internet (not the same, but it reminded me of it). This person was saying what the users on the site were good at and they were all comments on their abilities and their character but for me they said “Dominic is good at being a cute kid”. >.< Of course, I’m the type of person who doesn’t mind when people say that, but I know they must’ve said that on purpose as if I was some “dumb blond” or something with nothing to offer. :P

MacBean's avatar

Nobody notices that I’ve got a cute face, because I’m fat. Oh well. I deal.

noelasun's avatar

I’m not “pretty”. I look too… Serious? to be called pretty. I’ve always been a pretty serious looking person, (you should check out my baby pictures) and it has been a good thing in that it has helped me be taken more (what else?) seriously. As I’m female and small, the seriousness has been a plus.
What is also included in the “serious look” is that I guess I tend to look standoffish. I really wish I was more approachable looking.
Also, I hate it how people can’t seem to say flat out- “you’re pretty.” They end up saying something like “you look smart”. stupid idiot people
@Likeradar the “beautiful as always comment? My version of that is Oh, how intelligent you look. $*^&#!!!!

rooeytoo's avatar

I have always thought of myself as being sort of funny looking, not ugly I don’t think, maybe a little cute, but certainly not model beautiful, plus I am a little squirt.

They say statistically that good looking people have an advantage that starts in grade school and goes straight through to job hunting.

I guess I figure that if I were gorgeous I would probably never have accomplished what I have, simply because I wouldn’t have had to in order to survive.

mattbrowne's avatar

Yes, inner beauty does get more benefits in the long run.

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