General Question

ppcakes's avatar

How do you tell someone how bad they smell without being rude?

Asked by ppcakes (457points) April 7th, 2008

My roommates boyfriend is constantly here, whenever he sleeps over the smell in my room becomes unbearable. i have actually had to leave because of how bad it smells. i do not want to be rude and say he can’t stay here especially because if hes not here he has to travel 3 hours back home, but i would really like to either cover up the smell or get rid of it without being rude. i’ve tried febreeze, candles, then air fresheners (oder eliminators), we even have a air filter. he showers but obviously not as often or as well as he should.

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16 Answers

trogdor_87's avatar

Make him a pine air fresh necklace.

ppcakes's avatar

thats mean, i don’t mean hes just smelly, i mean like he actually reaks. Its not just his clothes either, like i want to slip him some deodorant and soap but i really cant, seeing as he will be living in my dorm for the next 3 months.

trogdor_87's avatar

Tell him like it is “you stink”. But after words let him know you are only telling him this because you don’t want others to judge him.

cwilbur's avatar

Okay, so when you say smelly, you mean, he’s got a lot of body odor that’s the probable result of him not showering at least daily? Or is it something else?

Does it not bother your roommate? Can you discuss it with her?

(I suspect if he’s got such an odor that you can smell it in your room when he’s in her room, something is seriously up, and you’re not the only one who’s having problems with him.)

ppcakes's avatar

@trogdor_87, i would really like to tell him how bad he smells but i’m not that kind of person, and he wouldn’t accept my honest opinion. he would say i was a certain word that starts with a c and ends with a unt.

trogdor_87's avatar

Well than he is a word that starts with a D and ends with oosh. Hope you figure something out.

kapuerajam's avatar

if he’s a heavy sleeper dab some calougne on him while he’s sleeping

Kay's avatar

Is it a regular dorm room with two beds or is it an apartment set-up? If you’re sharing one already-cramped room with another person then it’s kind of rude if they have someone else there all the time that isn’t paying to live there and on top of that smells. Could you switch roommates or complain to res life? It’s not the ideal way to resolve this situation, but if your roommate is going to have her boyfriend over all the time then I’m not quite sure what else to do. It’s one thing if it’s once in a while but having 3 people in a tiny dorm room for days at a time isn’t cool.

ppcakes's avatar

@nikipedia, thank you a lot but he’s a computer hacker, he would probably find out where it came from.

@kay, it is a one bedroom but we also have a livingroom but it is rather rude that they take hour showers with 4 other girls needing the bathroom and that he smells bad. i have thought about telling resident life, he’s only aloud to be signed in for 3 days 2 nights but he was a student here last quarter and his ID still works to get into the building. he also has a key to my room, so at any moment weather i’m having sex or getting changed, he can just walk in. I wouldnt mind it so much if like, “out of sight, out of mind” but he sleeps until about 2 in the afternoon and i have to tiptoe around him and while hes sleeping i can not air out the room. the only solution i have found to mask the oder is smoking pot. thats not practical though.

sumul's avatar

Do you and your roommate get along? These seem like the sorts of things you should be able to discuss with a good roommate. If not, then you should consider trying to get out of the situation; living with someone you’re not compatible with can negatively affect a lot of things in your life.

El_Cadejo's avatar

@ppcakes if its your roommates boyfriend i would have her talk to him about it. She will be able to do it in a way that lets him know GOD DAMN YOU SMELL LIKE SHIT without making him cry in the corner like a little girl. Also if you have any guy friends that come over when hes around that hes friendly with have one of them tell him. Guys are blunt with each other so i don’t think he’d take as emotionally compared to coming from you, a girl.

If all else fails i say give him a gift basket full of shampoos and deodorants. You get to say i care about you so i bought this for you and dude take a god damn bath you reek all with one little gesture.

ppcakes's avatar

@uberbatman, my bestfriend told me he would come over and take care of it. he told me he would come over and tell him how it is. and if i confronted my roommate about his stench she would just stick up for him and tell me i was trying to break them up. hahahaha.
@sumul, we kind of get along, but its like i don’t want her to think i’m being rude either, she is VERY protective of him.

monsoon's avatar

you should arrange for a couple friends of yours to like, pass him in the hall anonymously and be loudly grossed out by his smell.

Kay's avatar

He has a key to your room? Not cool. You should take this to res life as neither your roommate nor him are respectful of your right to at least a little privacy. You agreed to live with her, not him as well. Don’t put up with this crap.

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