Social Question

JessicaRabbit's avatar

What are rare forms of Leukemia?

Asked by JessicaRabbit (383points) November 21st, 2011

I recently made a post about a guy that I have had a thing with for a while. Out of the blue he started being distant with me and not talking to me. He also didn’t have any desire to come see me. So I thought he was seeing someone.
We started talking again but he seemed down about something. He was also talking kind of random. He started telling me he wants to have kids and asked me if I wanted to have a kid with him.
The next day(today) he asked me to Skype him. So I dolled myself up and Skyped him. The first thing he said to me was that I looked beautiful. He kept going on about it. Then we talked and laughed for about half an hr. He said he wanted to talk to me about something. I said “ok what is it?” He said “remember yesterday when we had a conversation about cancer?” I said “yes” He said “well I just wanted to let you know the reason why I have been distant and not feeling up to coming to see you is because I was diagnosed with leukemia three weeks ago.” He said “I am going for some testing by your house to decide what medications they will be putting me on, so I was thinking about coming by for a visit after”.
He said only a few people know and asked me not to tell anyone about it, as we share the same friends.
I was in shock when he told me but I believe I remember him saying it was a rare form. I don’t want to ask him because I don’t want to remind him. If anyone knows what forms are considered rare. He is 28 years old. He also said something about there being a small percentage chance of living through it. He said the percent which I believe it was 4% as his first episode of collapsing happened quite a while ago.
I know he is not lying. He isn’t that type of guy.
My hearts broken. If anyone has any miracle stories that would be nice.

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

12 Answers


My Mom had AML, a type of leukemia that is aggressive and usually fatal. She was in her early 70s when she had it, back in 2004. Although they didn’t want to tell us openly, the doctors seemed to suggest to us that my mother was doomed. It’s been 7 years since she had it. She defied the doctors. I am so proud of her. We can only hope and pray in such terrible circumstances. Remember, just because someone has a rare form of cancer, or any cancer for that matter, doesn’t mean that it’s an automatic death sentence for him/her. Every person is different, and responds to treatment in a different way, and also reacts to the cancer in a different way. I hope your friend can beat it. Good luck to him.

JessicaRabbit's avatar

Thanks so much.


@JessicaRabbit I know how you must be feeling. To have someone you love get cancer, is a nightmare, very depressing. But never lose hope.

JessicaRabbit's avatar

Ya its crazy. He kept saying I looked beautiful and I told him he looked good too, but he actually doesn’t look healthy. I was just about to spill my heart out to him to tell him how I truly feel about him. I still want to tell him how I feel just incase something were to happen but I don’t want to freak him out. So I am going to hold off. He already knows I care. We tell each other that all the time. Im just so sad that he has to go through something as horrible as this. It made me realize that I actually love him.

Coloma's avatar

Being a loving and supportive person is the greatest gift you can give, don’t hold back on telling him how you feel, obviously it is mutual and love brings strength and hope and visuals of a future. Sending well wishes for you both! :-)

JessicaRabbit's avatar

@Coloma Thanks :)
Also anyone reading this, I am sorry about all the spelling mistakes. I am not able to edit.

cazzie's avatar

Did he call it Non-Hodgkin Lymphoma? Probably not rare in that form, but it is an outdated name from a number of types of cancers of the lymph system, some more rare than others.

I am so sorry about your friend’s diagnosis. You must be a pretty special person that he turned to you. I am sure you will do everything you can. Wishing you both strength and patience for the time ahead.

Kayak8's avatar

I really don’t want to be a wet blanket here, but a guy telling you he has cancer, that he wants to have children, and don’t tell anyone else (shared friends), certainly has the ring of being some kind of ploy to sway your emotions toward him in a fashion that might result in bedding you. It could also be a ploy for attention. I don’t know any of the players but the hair was going up on the back of my neck as I read your description. Him not wanting you to talk to others about it is sticking in my craw.

Without being insensitive, and assuming it is all true, HE is the best one to ask what type of leukemia he has. You won’t be reminding him—it will be on his mind and he may actually be relieved to talk about it with one of the few people who know his situation. If your talking about it causes him to clam up, particularly if he can’t answer basic questions for which you could google the answers, I would be extremely suspicious. I would also, casually, ask what symptoms he had that made him think he should get it checked out.

I will say that I am over 50 and have worked with terminally ill folks for about half of my life. I have seen this situation about 5 or 6 times and in every case, the respective people were not telling the truth. That doesn’t prove or disprove your friend’s situation, but the story is all too familiar to me.

I would encourage your continued compassion (he either has a physical illness or serious mental health issues). It is more important that you focus on being the kind of friend you want to be rather than on wondering if he is the kind of friend who deserves your compassion. I am simply encouraging caution on your part so that YOU don’t get hurt in the process. I might also suggest that you ask him for the name of a mutual friend who also knows his situation so that you have someone, rather than always burdening him, that you can talk to as you walk through this with him.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I had a friend that was diagnosed with terminal leukemia and given six months to live. Twelve years later he’s still out and about all the time.

Tbag's avatar

@kayak8 well said. @JessicaRabbit if I were you, I would really be there for him and probably spill out the beans when it comes to feelings.

JessicaRabbit's avatar

@Kayak8 I have known him since I was fourteen years old. I know he is not lying. He is not that type of person for a fact. He did explain to me in detail about the type that he has and what his symptoms were but I was in shock and was just focused on cutting the conversation short because I didn’t want to cry in front of him. I think the reason why he told me is because we usually talk throughout the day everyday for the past I don’t even know how long now. He wanted to explain that the reason why he has been so distant with me in the last month wasn’t me or because he is seeing someone because I asked him a few times, what is up with him lately. I had planned on talking to him again about it tonight now that I can hold it together and thought about what I want to say. I know I didn’t really say the story properly and it sounds kind of suspicious but I was upset when I wrote it.

JessicaRabbit's avatar

I ended up finding out that it is AML. His family and our friends know. Unfortunately it was the truth. Thanks guys.

Answer this question




to answer.
Your answer will be saved while you login or join.

Have a question? Ask Fluther!

What do you know more about?
Knowledge Networking @ Fluther