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dallas44's avatar

Long distance relationship?

Asked by dallas44 (50points) May 17th, 2008 from iPhone

Im in a long distance relationship with the woman of my dreams, but sometime its really hard to be without her. And I miss her alot. What are some helpful tips to not let the distance effect our close relationship and keep it as exciting as it was the first day I fell in love with her

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8 Answers

bmhit1991's avatar

frequent flier miles haha

skfinkel's avatar

How long has the relationship been going on? Have you ever been in the same city?

marinelife's avatar

Long distance is hard to do! One plus is that the times you do get to be together are like falling in love all over again. So, in between, fan that flame.

Think of little ways to surprise her and show her you are thinking of her and of the two of you. Sure flowers are good, but something more intimate is better. Some of things that have touched me the most that my husband has done through the years:

1. He sent me a video clip from a 40s romantic comedy (we both love those) with a steamy (as in chemistry) scene and said in the email that watching it made him think of us and when we would be together the next week.

2. He sent me a link to an NPR clip of a French love song and said that when he heard the story he thought about me. I had heard the same story and had gotten tears in my eyes at the time because I was thinking of him. So hearing that we “shared” that moment even though apart was very moving.

3. Both of us have treasured hand-drawn cards over commercial ones through the years. I am no artist AT ALL, but he loves it when I draw funny cartoon strips for him with our inside jokes.

Here’s a couple of other ideas:

Make a list of plans for your next get together and send them to her with an “I can hardly wait” messsage.

Create the romance equivalent of an advent calendar (with little sayings, short poems, photos of you, cartoons) to help her count down the days.

Doing these things for her will warm your lonely heart.

Good luck. It’s hard, but it can be done! I have many friends who have done it for a year or more at a time.

scamp's avatar

This question has been addressed here before. If you follow this link you might find some of the answers you’re looking for. Good luck to you, and Welcome to Fluther!

marinelife's avatar

I didn’t think the other questions were that similar. Also, is it that bad to revisit questions? I do appreciate the experienced Flutherites pointing me to older threads, many of which I have enjoyed reading, though.

scamp's avatar

No, that’s not what I meant. I meant the asker could read the other threads and possibly get some ideas from them. I think you misunderstood my intent.This is probably a better link than the first one I posted.

ljs22's avatar

I had a long distance relationship fail. I think the main problem was we stopped talking about real things, and started just relating the events of our day each night on the phone. The substance was lost to tiredness and a lack of understanding. We were both in transition and focusing on other things. Be sure to keep asking probing questions, and expect that the other person will change in the time you are apart.

Sher_King's avatar

I loved someone for four years, sometimes i still do. The first few months we lived together in london. Then he left. And every six months id see him in different parts of the world. The only reason why I will always love him is because even though we were a part, we pushed our selves to live a free life. That means, dating, going out with friends, appreciate life because we never knew when the next time would be. We knew that if we really had the chance to be together, then it would only be about us. You guys have to be insync and give eachother freedom. Or else you are one depressed person in bed crying on your own wishing someone was there to keep you company. Then you realise that you’ve missed out on a lit. Its super hard and not worth it. Live life and believe that what you guys have cant be replaced.

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