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Imadethisupwithnoforethought's avatar

What do you consider your sexual responsibility to others?

Asked by Imadethisupwithnoforethought (14625points) February 4th, 2013

Prior to having sex with someone, do you evaluate if you are a net positive to their life or a net negative?

Is this healthy? Should you just have sex with them assuming that it will all work out? Is it even your responsibility? Has anyone ever told you that they wouldn’t have sex with you because it would screw up your life?

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10 Answers

woodcutter's avatar

Sometimes we all just gotta bust a nut. Nothing complicated sometimes.

rojo's avatar

Oooh, way out of my league. I have been monogamous for more years than I can remember and it is not something that I have to concern myself with.

bookish1's avatar

As long as neither of us is hurting some other party, I feel that it is the other person’s responsibility to determine whether being involved with me will be a ‘net positive’ or ‘net negative’ for them.

zenvelo's avatar

My responsibility is to not be coercive or forceful, and to not take advantage of someone who is vulnerable or unable to make an informed decision. But for a consenting adult, it is up to the other person.

Unbroken's avatar

It is impossible and haughty to try to presume you know whether you would be positive or negative to their life.

Net is impossible to quanitfy even in hindsight.

The only thing you can decide is whether or not it would be a positive or negative thing to you. And even then it is just an unproven hypothesis or judgement call.

If a person is a rational/reasoning adult it would be insulting to make decisions for them. Though the intentions may be noble.

The responsibilty you have is to not mislead. Or at least that would be the most one could ask for.

And I think I misguidely told that to one person, or a version. They were offended and hurt. And it was not necessarily true. What was the bigger truth was I was not interested enough and I found it easier to phrase it that way. Believeing there was an element of truth in it. Never did that again.

Shippy's avatar

Always tell people of your intention that way they have a choice.

TheobromosHumper's avatar

Whoa, dude! You think too much. Plus you’re a mind reader. When I get involved with people, I trust them to know their own best self interest. I am not as smart as you. I can’t figure out what someone else needs.

augustlan's avatar

If we’re just talking about casual sex and not a relationship, I think my responsibility is just to make sure they have a good time. This is, of course, assuming that we are both on the same page and only want casual sex.

Moving into relationship territory, I did think about whether or not it would be good for the other person. I have refrained from getting into and/or backed out of relationships that were harmful to the other person, even if they were good for me. Mostly, I’m thinking about people who fell in love with me and I didn’t love them back.

mazingerz88's avatar

Great question. For a casual encounter. Using protection and making sure my partner asks for seconds are my ideas of sexual responsibility. For someone I could fall in love with. Using protection and making sure she asks for seconds and thirds and fourths. Because. I. Will. : )

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