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kiyah241's avatar

What should I do? What type of illness is being diagnosed?

Asked by kiyah241 (20points) September 25th, 2016

My boyfriend talks to himself. At times he would laugh out loud when something would be funny but he would really over do it. it could be silence & he would laugh. He also giggles, or have smirks on his face. you wouldnt know unles you look at him. its like youd have to catch him doing it off gaurd. He know that i am aware of the odd things he do. He is aware himself. One day we smoked, and he got to start talking to himself, having smirks on his face. He even smacked me out of nowhere. when the high went away i asked him why he do that, he stated ” i kept calling him stupid” when i never said such thing. i asked him again he said ” i was talking shit” but like i said i never said anything rude towards or about him. He even trembled a little while talking & smiling that day. I know nothing was wrong with the subtance(marijuana) because i smoked majority of it and im very fine! healthy as ever. he only had 5 puffs. however on a normal daily basis, he talks to himself, laughs, he have blank stares as well, when id catch him blank starring id come close to him, get in his face and softly ask “Whats on your mind? hed say “you” or nothing! sometimes he cant think straight, like he be over thinking. he a even tell me “im getting irritated. id ask whats wrong, he a tell me but sometimes i tend to get a feeling something else is wrong and what he told me is a cover up from what is really wrong. i thought he could have schizophrenia but what i dont understand when we talk his responses actually makes sense. he dresses well, hes in school & work. he keep his hygiene up as well. though i feel somethin is seriously wrong with him. he feels something is wrong with him. but he wont speak on anything unless i do so. but i always sugarcoat because i dont want to be directly forward only because i cant predict how he would feel or react. we’ve been dating for 2 years & 2months now. this just started going on this year 2016, the talking to hisself, laughing outloud etc. he doesnt really have friends, he always hung with his older brother and like 2 or 3 of his friends. I love him dearly and is very concern. A 17 year old is to young to suffer from a mental illness. Btw he doesnt smokes, he doesnt drink as well. He stopped smoking marijuana a very long time ago becuase his head would start hurting afterwards. No one is moving fast enough to get him seen so what can i do?

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16 Answers

janbb's avatar

He does need to be seen by a mental health professional. Is there a counselor at school that can start the process for him. We can’t diagnose anything over the internet. Maybe there is a clinic in your town where he can be seen.

Cruiser's avatar

Cudos for you to reach out for help and explanations to what you are witnessing with your BF. Fluther is an excellent resource for recipes, greatest bands ever and how to rebuild engine carburetors, but what you are asking involves serious medical/neurological issues no one here can provide an answer that you truly require. Reach out to his parents at the very least to help you understand better what this young man is experiencing.

janbb's avatar

A further thought – maybe there is an adult in your life that you can talk to about it: a minister, a teacher or a relative.

kritiper's avatar

Overly eccentric. You could check with your local health department, too.

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

I would talk to your school counsellor. People can suffer from mental health issues at any age. It’s good he has stopped smoking marijuana because at 17 your brain is not fully developed and it could cause him further problems.

You mentioned he hit out at you, that’s not okay. You need to make it very clear to him you won’t stand him being violent towards you. However, he might not be able to control himself without medication if he does have a mental illness. If that’s the case, you need to seek advice about whether you are at risk. I know you care about him, but your safety has to be your first priority.

I hope your friend is okay.

Espiritus_Corvus's avatar

The advice above is good and you should seriously consider it. I’d just like to say how lucky he is to have a person like you. Welcome to Fluther.

kiyah241's avatar

He slapped me when we smoked that one time. He not abusive at all. He’s normal but just do abnormal things however When the high went away i told him bout the odd things he did that day, the following night i was otp with him, we were posed to go to sleep but i never went to sleep, however he woke up out his & i heard him having a full conversation well full responses as if someone was saying something for him to respond to. the next day i asked was someone in his room, he responded no. i reminded him of the odd things he did the day we smoked & the night he was talking, he said he dont remember none that i said he did. he told me he know i was tripping & that he wasnt talking cause he was halfway sleep but the thing is, he really was. i heard him very clear! when he stopped the talking he then picked up the phone & said hello. it makes me sad because i wouldve never thought hed develop strange ways.his mother is aware of his oddness, his grandma knows as well as his brother. He don’t say much to noone but me. It kind of makes me feel good to know he’s comfortable with me. It’s just since he knows something is wrong with him, and he know i know something isn’t right i wanted to go to the doctor its just i dont want to leave his mom out of information from the doctor that she may need to know. but his moms acts so busy because she has things going on with herself, i feel like noone is taken it as serious as me. esp. with him being my bf, id have to live & be with him not them. & far as a school conselour we dont attend school together. i was going to just let everything out one of these week days to him. he usually okay with understanding me even if he doesnt agree, he still listens. i believe he developed a personality disorder or is stressed! his mother did remind me he been through things in his life. he always been quiet around people. im so scared cause schizophrenia could be the illness to. but i also doubt it, because his symptoms doesnt match as much as schizo. he doesnt have dellusions or doesnt make sense when he speaks, & like i said he works, he graduate this year, dresses nice and wants to do all the right things for himself. i came here because i wanted some answers. thank you guys for your input. it was helpful.

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

@kiyah241, you could still talk to your school counsellor. They may know someone at your boyfriend’s school who can check in with him to make sure he’s okay. Other than that, encourage him to see a doctor.

And while he may not be violent now, certain types of mental illness can lead to people becoming violent. He might never become violent, but you need to be careful and remain observant. It sounds like he really does need some medical help. As @Espiritus_Corvus said, he’s lucky to have such a caring friend. Hopefully it’s nothing too serious.

We’re happy to help.

cazzie's avatar

A small list came to mind. Your friend needs to see a doctor, and he needs to be honest about when he started and how much weed he smokes and any other brain altering substances he’s taken. There are several forms of turrets and even epilepsy came to mind. It sounds like a legitimate need for a doctor. Please make sure he sees one.

Sneki95's avatar

Get him to a psychologist, a professional will know what to do.

It’s nice of you that you want to help him rather than running away. If he gets adequate help and support, he will get better. Please get him to a doctor, the sooner he receives help, the easier it will be for him to deal with his state and to keep his well being.

Bill1939's avatar

It seems to me that your boyfriend is suffering from a severe mental disorder. Many people who are schizophrenic, hear voices that sometimes amuse and other times abuse them. At times, it is difficult for them to distinguish between what is happening inside and outside of their mind.

I worked in a maximum-security mental hospital with men largely given the diagnosed of paranoid schizophrenia. One man that I had a friendship with after his release was on medication that enabled him to avoid psychotic breaks. However, a single toke of pot would cause him to become psychotic; he no longer smokes it.

The onset of schizophrenia often begins or become apparent in adolescence. Sadly, they are often unwilling to accept that they have this psychological condition and refuse to get professional help. You are a good friend, and your desire to help is commendable. When I was a young man, my girlfriend was severely mentally ill—probably one reason why I got a degree in psychology—so I can empathize with how difficult this is for you.

If you are still in high school, consult the school’s guidance counselor. A counselor may not only be able to provide help for your friend, but can also help you deal with the effects that his illness has on you. You can also ask your doctor to recommend a psychologist with whom you can discuss this situation. My heart goes out to you.

kiyah241's avatar

he’s very honest. His gaurdians are home daily, he cannot be sneaky at all. trust me what happens in the dark comes to the light for him. he’s not an addict or anything. He’s a good boy! He know something is wrong, he trynna fight it & figure it out. Scizhophrenia could be it. but its not. he has more of a personality disorder or is stressed !! i did my research. i need him to get seen by a doctor, a therapist or someone though to get specific results. i could be wrong but i doubt i am because schizophreniacs have symptoms he doesnt have. He very much normal but have abnormal ways, which is the problem. He know some wrong with him. people with schizophrenia have disbeliefs theyre okay, even when proven wrong. They harm them selves and etc. he’s not a threat to himself or anyone in his household.

flo's avatar

@kiyah241 “One day we smoked, and he got to start talking to himself, having smirks on his face. He even smacked me out of nowhere_when the high went away ....”

He smacked you?

kiyah241's avatar

yeah, he said cause i called him stupid, then i asked again he said cause i was talking shit, then i asked again he said i smack him all the time, he didnt think id get mad about it… though i smack him playfully, or not so hard when im angry with him. however we was on good terms & randomly slapped me. but i told him dont do it nomore, he apologized and made it up to me. he would never try to hurt me forreal. he aint slap me like he was trynna smack my eyes out, he just did it. of course with any male theyre strength come off stronger then females so i got over angry about it & i was scared a little cause it was random for him to do that & it caught me off gaurd but when we talked about it he remembered doing it what he did. idk what the reason for it was to this day. i only got what he told me but that was a first and last time he ever hit me

Bill1939's avatar

@kiyah241, it would be wrong for anyone here to suggest a diagnosis of your friend’s illness. Psychiatrists do not always agree on which diagnosis best describes a patient’s symptoms. The psychiatric disorders defined by Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5), the American Psychiatric Association’s classification and diagnostic tool, has low inter-rater reliability for many disorders; several sections contain poorly written, confusing, or contradictory information; and the psychiatric drug industry unduly influenced the manual’s content (see).

If I seemed to imply that your friend suffered from schizophrenia, I regret it. My comments were based on my very limited experience with mental illness. You are correct to question whether another mental illness would better describe your friend’s suffering.

flo's avatar

@kiyah241 I think you could both stop the smacking thing, hard or not.

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