General Question

beccabeccab3's avatar

How can I be less self conscious?

Asked by beccabeccab3 (20points) 3 months ago

I’m 13 and have become more self conscious the last couple months and we just started a new church that’s really big and lots of people talk to me. I get shy and I want to stop doing that. So how do I stop being so self conscious?

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

6 Answers

Magical_Muggle's avatar

It’s very difficult to just stop being self conscious, or even, for that fact, give a way to instantly stop being self conscious. It’s something that does take time and a lot of self work.
I’m also quite self conscious, i Completely understand. What I found worked to help me on my journey was a hairstyle change-up (I got rid of my fringe and changed my parting).
I want you to remember, though, that no matter what people say, or what you think, you are beautiful, and smart, and perfect. Try to tell yourself this every day before bed, or before school, keep little affirmations beside your bed that you can read. These little things don’t seem like much, but they really do help.
Something else that I find always helpful to remember when meeting new people and making new friends is: if they can’t accept you for who you are then they’re probably not worth your time – it doesn’t mean that you’re not any good, it means that they’re missing out.
Something else I find that helps is taking care of yourself, start a skincare regime, but some face masks (if you like makeup, buy some nice pallettes). Self care is super duper important to your ability to find self confidence.
Don’t forget that you are enough!!
Best of luck

MrGrimm888's avatar

I agree with the self-confidence theme.

Confidence is best, when it is genuine. In other words, learn. Knowledge is power.

Exercise, and develop your mind/body. Then, you can have true confidence. Once you obtain a higher level of understanding of your world, you will become more confident. Fear, is based on the unknown. The more you understand about your world, the less will be unknown/scary.

Knowledge will give you the ability to gain experience. Experience, coupled with knowledge, is a formidable force, and makes a formidable person. Then, it is important to humble yourself, and shape your knowledge/power into who you want to be. Your knowledge will give you the power to spread your knowledge to others, making you an even more powerful being!

At 13, you’ve got your destiny in your hands. There is no limit, to what you wish to achieve. You just have to find your path, and go.

Best of luck!

Peace n Love.

kritiper's avatar

Always tell yourself “I can,” never “I can’t.”

Patty_Melt's avatar

One thing so many people don’t realize, is nearly every teen feels self conscious. The very people you admire, or feel jealous about have their insecure moments too.
When my daughter was your age she was so self conscious it really affected her deeply.
She spent her lunch break for the first week of school in the bathroom, because she was so afraid of approaching a table with people already sitting there. She didn’t tell me til months later. I cried. I couldn’t bear thinking of her going hungry like that.
Someone noticed she was doing this, and went in to get her and invite her to sit together.
She got involved with theater her freshman year, and it made a huge impact.
Her preference is to not play a lead role. She likes doing props, and lights. She is really good. She helps the other Thespians with learning their lines. She is a senior now. She has oodles of friends. Last year she got involved with a community theater group. She is very excited about working with them.
You have some great advice here from others. I just wanted to share this story with you because I’m hoping it helps you see that it is something you can deal with.

rojo's avatar

I would like to pass this article on to you and suggest that you give it a read. I realize that it is geared toward the adult that has self-confidence issues but that is just another point; it is not just the young who suffer from this, it can, and does affect all ages and sexes.

Just take the article and act upon the principles laid out as they actually apply to you.

augustlan's avatar

I was extremely self-conscious as a teenager, to the point of social anxiety. (If you feel it’s that bad for you, too, please talk to your parents and doctor…there is help.) Unfortunately, I didn’t figure out it was anxiety until much later in life, so the only thing that helped me during that time was practice, practice and more practice. The more you do something, the easier it is to feel okay about it. I know it’s hard, but you can do it!

One other thing I didn’t realize until I was an adult is that all the people we think are noticing our awkwardness, or our clothes, hair, etc. are far too busy worrying about their own awkwardness, clothes, hair to really notice ours!

Answer this question




to answer.

This question is in the General Section. Responses must be helpful and on-topic.

Your answer will be saved while you login or join.

Have a question? Ask Fluther!

What do you know more about?
Knowledge Networking @ Fluther