General Question

JackAdams's avatar

You are informed by Gawd that you may ask ONLY THREE questions and that they will be honestly/factually answered. So, what do you ask?

Asked by JackAdams (6497points) October 9th, 2008

Try not to ask questions that can be answered with only the words “Yes” or “No,” by The Creator, because She (or, He) does have a sense of humor. Also, I would suggest avoiding questions that begin with, “Why did you…” or “How did you…” or even, “Why didn’t you…” And, considering that this is probably your only chance to have an audience with The Almighty, you don’t want to mess up this opportunity, do you? Here are mine, and I would preface each one by requesting that each answer be in English, and in written form:

1. What are the Powerball winning numbers going to be, where the next 300 jackpots will be over $100 million each, and on what dates will those drawings occur?

2. What are the cures and/or vaccines for all known diseases and maladies of mankind, including the aging process?

3. Where can humans find irrefutable proof/evidence regarding the identity of the true killer(s) of President John Fitzgerald Kennedy, the exact location of the Beale Treasure, and the complete truth regarding the Roswell UFO Crash?

Your turn!

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36 Answers

Mr_M's avatar

I just have one…“Why the hell did you make Danny Bonaduce?”

Randy's avatar

I don’t think I’d ask anything. In my beliefs, God lets me know all I need to. No more and no less.If I don’t know, then I’m sure it’s for a good reason.

rockstar's avatar

I would agree with Randy…..although the Powerball numbers would be nice :)

tinyfaery's avatar

I have only one question: “Why am I talking to somebody that doesn’t exist?”

Malakai's avatar

1) If I am allowed to own slaves as long as they are taken from a different nation state, why won’t the US government allow me to own a Canadian? Should I fight this immoral power in order to live my life in accordance with your Word?

2) Do I really have to gather the entire village together to stone a man to death for working on the sabbath? Wouldn’t it be less work to take care of it myself?

3) I know the bible says I should not come into contact with a woman who is on her menstrual cycle, but I have a hard time telling on sight, and many find it impolite to ask. How am I to know when a woman is “unclean?”

fireside's avatar

Only three questions?
Can I have more?

JackAdams's avatar

You just used them up! LOL

SuperMouse's avatar

I’m breaking the rules for one question Jack, I’d apologize, but I’m not sorry. Also, I would ask Him if that is alright, but I’m not really willing to waste a question.

1. Why did you take my mom so young?
2. What exactly do we humans need to do to achieve peace in this world once and for all?
3. Who was that on the boardwalk in Santa Cruz?

I would ask about disease etc., but you got that covered Jack.

JackAdams's avatar

No “rules;” just respectful suggestions…

JackAdams's avatar

Malakai, have you read this?

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God’s Law. I have learned a great deal from your radio show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them.

1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord—Lev. 1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness—Lev. 15:19–24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense at such a question.

4. Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can’t I own Canadians?

5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination—Lev. 11:10—it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don’t agree. Can you settle this?

7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they be executed?

9. I know from Lev. 11:6–8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them?—Lev.24:10–16. Couldn’t we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

Malakai's avatar

I didn’t realize we were allowed to own Mexicans.

silly me…

Well, at least there’s that.

JackAdams's avatar

“With Gawd, all things are possible…”

fireside's avatar

I think that when looking back on holy texts, it is important to differentiate the Spiritual from the Cultural teachings.

So many people get hung up on the dogma that was originally intended to develop the culture of the people at that time, when the focus should actually be on the spiritual aspects.

I’m pretty sure that we have moved past many of the cultural issues laid out in the holy books, but the spiritual ones remain constant from age to age and from holy book to holy book..

Hobbes's avatar

@Fireside – In other words: “Don’t look at the man behind the curtain!”

fireside's avatar

No, quite the opposite, Hobbes.
Don’t get distracted by the curtain, look beyond.

Malakai's avatar

Please explain. It is ok for me to work on the sabbath? It is ok to covet my neighbor’s ox? Or sell my daughter into slavery? Are these spiritual teachings or cultural teachings?
I don’t understand the criteria.

I’m genuinely perplexed it when people tell me to “focus” on one aspect of biblical teachings and ignore the others.

The God of Abraham seems to be a pretty severe dude, I doubt he would appreciate such cherry picking of his holy texts.

fireside's avatar

Progressive Revelation is far too expansive of a topic for me to boil down right now.

The God of Abraham is the same as the God of Moses and yet:
Much of the Mosaic Law in the Hebrew Scriptures required ritual sacrifices of animals as a mechanism by which a person could either attain forgiveness for their sins or terminate an interval of ritual impurity. Some procedures are quite elaborate and specific. But Isaiah 1:11 quoted God as giving a new revelation which essentially abolished the ritual sacrifice system: “To what purpose is the multitude of your sacrifices unto me?...I am full of the burnt offerings of rams, and the fat of fed beasts; and I delight not in the blood of bullocks, or of lambs, or of he goats….incense is an abomination unto me

Hobbes's avatar

Aaaaand number of posts it took to turn this thread into another religious debate? NINE!

Malakai's avatar

From the provided link:

There are many instances in the Hebrew Scriptures (Old Testament) and Christian Scriptures (New Testament) in which Jews and/or Christians suddenly shifted their beliefs and practices. Previous revelation in the form of the Mosaic code or the teachings of the prophets were replaced, greatly expanded, or even reversed. Often, a fundamental belief of the ancient Israelites was overturned and an entirely new concept substituted.

You’ll just have to forgive me for not being terribly impressed by this… So the rules are… whatever the priests of the day say the rules are? Seems a little thin for an omni-present all knowing being to me.

@Hobbes—Yea, you’re right. I give up.
I mean it had the word Gawd in it what did you expect?

gailcalled's avatar

1) A question about porn.
2) A question that would let me usurp many of the answers.
3) a question about perfume names.

fireside's avatar

Why can’t we all just get along?
Where’s the beef?
Who squeezed the Charmin?

malakai – the idea is that people will have a hard enough time with the baby steps of revelation. to reveal it all at once would overwhelm. start with a common understanding and build upon it. rome wasn’t built in a day.

Nimis's avatar

I wonder if after asking my three questions, they will tell me to wait a day until I ask another (but love my enthusiasm!)

JackAdams's avatar

My Gawd, what have I done?

I’ve created a monster!!!!

fireside's avatar

that’s only one question, jack.

Malakai's avatar

Yes, I’m sure it’s just faar too complicated to understand. We wouldn’t want to be overwhelmed!


Hobbes's avatar

1. How does every particle in the universe currently interact with every other particle in the universe?
2. How has every particle in the universe interacted with every other particle in the universe since the universe’s beginning?
3. What are the implications of all of these past and present interactions?

I would get about a second of pure, transcendent understanding before my brain exploded. = ]

JackAdams's avatar

And somewhere in the mix would be, “42.”

fireside's avatar

Nothing wrong with knowing everything and then becoming a part of it.

JackAdams's avatar

If you know everything, then you are a part of it.

fireside's avatar

Yup, then your brain explodes into 42 pieces : )

Nimis's avatar

If you knew everything, you could then become a part of it.

But since you can’t know everything,
the only way to be a part of everything is to know nothing about it.

But since we no longer know nothing, we will never be a part of everything.

But that isn’t to say that there is no satisfaction in trying.
This makes sense in my head somehow.

JackAdams's avatar

I’m sending your answer to the CIA

They should have it translated into English and decoded, in less than a week.

Or, your money back.

(It might actually make sense to Miss Teen USA SC)

fireside's avatar

I think Nimis might be on to something.
It all goes back to Eve and that dastardly snake with the smooth tongue!

Nimis's avatar

Jack: The CIA already talks to me in my head. Just kidding.

Fire: Kind of. But in much less foreboding terms.
As frustrating as it may be at times, I think it’s kind of nice to be striving for it.

fireside's avatar

Ever forward

alekseistevens's avatar

1. why did you create the universe? is this your hobby, or is it a full-time thing?

2. who created you/where do you come from?

3. is michio kaku crazy or brilliant?

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