General Question

writetovinay's avatar

Why do lovers use baby language to talk to each other?

Asked by writetovinay (66points) May 22nd, 2009

ever wondered why couples in love use baby language to talk to each other? the language that is used to talk to babies? i dont know about married couples…what can be the possible reason?

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68 Answers

TaoSan's avatar

I’m in love, I don’t booochie booochie booochie! :)

casheroo's avatar

shuddering at remember a guy that used to talk baby talk to me

Uh, because they’ve got a screw loose?

ru2bz46's avatar

Anticipating nine months in the future?

chyna's avatar

Makes me want to punch them in the throat.

jbfletcherfan's avatar

@chyna that’d make two of us! And if I ever did that to my now husband, he’d have been history!

dannyc's avatar

To impress other cringing observers who barf behind their backs, and they are too stupid to realize it.

NaturalMineralWater's avatar

I don’t baby talk my wife. That would be weird and unpleasant.

janbb's avatar

Never do.

essieness's avatar

I don’t baby talk. That’s kinda weird. I do use pet names like baby, dolly, lovie, papa. I don’t know why. I guess it’s endearing?

eponymoushipster's avatar

because it’s not annoying enough to rub it in that you’re in love, you also need to be a friggin pain in the ass about it around other people.

knitfroggy's avatar

I’ve never had anyone talk baby talk to me and if anyone ever had I’d would have punched them in the mouth. I’ve never ever felt the urge to baby talk my husband, he’s pretty much a grown man even though he does act like a baby sometimes

SeventhSense's avatar

It’s a secret language that makes people even closer.
We all have inside jokes and certain catch phrases and pet names.
The result is greater intimacy.:)

writetovinay's avatar

@SeventhSense i guess u are correct…
however one does ask “wht exactly is baby talk?”
@essieness does using pet names imply use of some kind of baby talk..?
i tend to use words like honey, darling, sweeti…

essieness's avatar

@writetovinay I’m not sure. When I think baby talk, I think “smooshy gooshy goo, baby bye, wook at the wittle man…” and so on. Blech. I agree with @SeventhSense that pet names are a secret language that create intimacy.

mockturtle's avatar

I don’t think I’ve ever heard baby talk between two adults except for the Seinfeld “Schmoopie” episode. If I heard that in real life, it would be hilarious. I figure that most people who use baby talk to their sweethearts probably keep it somewhat private.

I think pet names are a different thing—a nickname you provide, not necessarily in a baby-voice.

eponymoushipster's avatar

my comment maybe made me sound bitter.

chyna's avatar

@eponymoushipster No, you sound like you are just stating what you feel.

eponymoushipster's avatar

@chyna ohgood. i mean, i’m bitter. but i don’t want to bum people out. ;)

chyna's avatar

@eponymoushipster Then it’s all good.

essieness's avatar

@eponymoushipster Please hire a hooker and get over this bitterness. For the lurve…~

eponymoushipster's avatar

@essieness hire a hooker? bwah. i live in the northeast. we only have “escorts”.

Loried2008's avatar

I dunno but I’ve caught myself doing it and I annoy the crap outta myself Oo

writetovinay's avatar

@Loried2008 an honest answer..hahaha..what do u think is the probable reason?

DrasticDreamer's avatar

I would never talk that way or allow someone to talk to me that way, but I think certain couples might do it for a sense of security. Maybe there’s a part of people that can still be brought to elation just hearing words like that spoken to them because it calls up their babyhood? Which is generally a time of total security and comfort.

Dunno, really. Maybe…

Loried2008's avatar

Well my parents did it actually. Especially my mom when she thought one of the kids were cute :)

I guess I picked up on it. I mean I didn’t sit there ALL the time and talk to my bf at the time like he was a kid. Every once in awhile I’d be like: “Aw you’re just cute!” and squeak or somethin and his name was kevin so I’d call him kebby. It was LLLAAAMMMEEE-OOO.

It was only with that one guy, it’s like I got knocked in the head or something lol

Loried2008's avatar

It’s almost like you wanna be child like about your relationship it’s weird. I didn’t do it on purpose lol

eponymoushipster's avatar

i think they’ve scientifically proven that there is a “baby” period in new relationships, and during this time, you’re very cutesy and touchy. it was on discovery channel – i wish i could find a website.

Others say it’s a way to avoid “adult conversation”, and there’s even a report (if you google) that says it’s a way to maintain a “positive” conversation flow. whatever.

Loried2008's avatar

That’s sounds right to me cause this guy was UBER intelligent and I’d feel REALLY uncomfortable around him at times because well I’m NOT a geek soo I couldn’t relate.

justwannaknow's avatar

Never did, never will. do not know why anyone would but it is thier life.

Facade's avatar

Because it’s cute :P

augustlan's avatar

My ex-husband and I had a form of this… we’d make up and sing silly songs to each other. But in normal conversation? Um, no.

DarkScribe's avatar

I don’t know. After all it is a cat, isn’t it?

mattbrowne's avatar

Mirror neurons.

Please note that the functions of mirror neurons are not a proven theory yet, but there are several very interesting hypotheses related to them based on empirical evidence. Let’s start with a definition and a general description.

A mirror neuron is a neuron that fires both when an animal acts and when the animal observes the same action performed by another animal (especially by another animal of the same species). Thus, the neuron “mirrors” the behavior of another animal, as though the observer were itself acting. Some scientists consider mirror neurons one of the most important findings of neuroscience in the last decade.

Mirror neurons have been interpreted as the mechanism by which we simulate others in order to better understand them, and therefore their discovery has been taken by some as a validation of simulation theory.

Mirror neurons also explain why yawning is contagious. There are some studies analyzing baby talk between two adults who are in love:

Psychologists consider lovers’ babytalk a real and valid form of bonding. A study by Meredith Bombar and Lawrence Littig suggests it’s a good sign: Babytalkers were more secure and less avoidant in romantic relationships. In effect they’re reactivating primal circuits of attachment. Babytalking lovers get a blast of dopamine and oxytocin in areas of the brain involved in reward and bonding — the ventral tegmental area, orbitofrontal cortex, and anterior cingulate cortex. According to psychologists, mutual use of high-pitched voices, soothing whispers, cooing, lisping, and overexpressive faces is a way of “looping” or “mirroring” affection. Exclusive and intimate, it’s an act of trust-building.

Mirror neurons are a fascinating subject of ongoing research. We can expect more surprises and more revelations !

aprilsimnel's avatar

Wow. I’ve never cooed at a bf, but I’ve been cooed at. I think it’s funny!

ru2bz46's avatar

Very cool, as always, @mattbrowne.

cak's avatar

@mattbrowne – very interesting.

I’m trying to think if I’ve ever baby-talked to my husband before. I don’t know if I have, doubtful, though.

tiffyandthewall's avatar

i guess if you’re comfortable enough to sound like a fool by talking to your S.O like he/she is a baby or cat (and they don’t leave/punch you), you can feel confident that you can do just about anything else without feeling like a fool/scaring them away.

SeventhSense's avatar

There’s a lot of violence on this thread…~_~

chyna's avatar

Evidently, baby talk brings out the worst in people.

SeventhSense's avatar

Unless it’s from a baby.
At which point it melts your heart.:)

chyna's avatar

Aww, yours?

SeventhSense's avatar

No but cute huh?

EmpressPixie's avatar

I read an article recently about this—researchers were looking at relationship length and the development of a shared lingo basically. Including babytalk, cutesy names for things, all the stuff in a relationship that kind of makes you want to vomit. Unfortunately for everyone that annoys, the people who do it have stronger, longer lasting relationships.

Excuse me while I go back to cooing at my boyfriend.

writetovinay's avatar

@EmpressPixie make sure ur bf reads that article

casheroo's avatar

@EmpressPixie So, do nicknames count or babytalk? I consider babytalk to be much different than having multiple nicknames for people. I have that with my husband, but usually stick to just one haha

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

When I think of baby talk between adult lovers, I’m thinking along the lines of pet names, soft tones, awwwws, teasings charged with sexual undertones, all of which I admit have worked on me without inciting violent reaction. I guess it’s important to start out with two people who are crazy about each other though.

ru2bz46's avatar

Funny, I never thought of baby talk having sexual undertones. I think of it as the goo goo ga ga crap, which does incite violence. Pet names and such are just normal stuff that I expect. Hmmm…maybe I’m a baby talker and don’t realize it. ;-)

chyna's avatar

@ru2bz46 Don’t make me punch you in the throat.

ru2bz46's avatar

@chyna Good point. I think I’d’ve been “informed” by now if I was a baby talker.

SeventhSense's avatar

Chyna wina moogoo gai pan…:)

chyna's avatar

@SeventhSense Is that baby talk or chinese food? (miss the puppy avatar)

SeventhSense's avatar

Ooooh! just gave me a great idea for an avatar…

chyna's avatar

^^wanting punched in throat

SeventhSense's avatar


Loried2008's avatar

my bf liked it sometimes. I think there’s a limit to it.

SeventhSense's avatar

Well a girl who can talk cute, sexy and dirty is a gift from the gods.

chyna's avatar

@SeventhSense You’re going to keep that stupid avatar aren’t you?

SeventhSense's avatar

He’s so chill. Of course. Check out the full size pic. That’s a cool baby.

chyna's avatar

Poor child.

SeventhSense's avatar

He’s got a great tattoo as well. :)

chyna's avatar

You mean other than the one on his forehead?

SeventhSense's avatar

that’s paid advertising…baby’s foreheads don’t come cheap :)

Loried2008's avatar

@SeventhSense Well I guess I’m a gift then ;) lol cause I do all three

chyna's avatar

@SeventhSense Is that the mark of the devil? :)

tyh's avatar

I love it when a woman talks baby talk. Its cute and I love and accept her humble display of affection. I think people who hate any innocent outward displays of love tend have a bit of spite and resentment toward deep love…. Or your just angry and looking for something to hate on.

Either way I think people do it because they are human.

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