General Question

Disc2021's avatar

When meeting someone new, how long do you wait to call? Do you even wait?

Asked by Disc2021 (4483points) August 8th, 2009

I know this question is probably did to hell but I want your opinions – How long do you wait to call after meeting someone while out and receiving their number? Does the fact that they seemed pretty interested play a factor?

No one wants to seem obsessive so you of course dont want to smother someone immediately and wait – but how long do you wait so that the person doesn’t misinterpret that as a loss of interest?

Is it weird to just text the next day or two and say “What’s up?”

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14 Answers

Facade's avatar

Waiting to call is a sophomoric game people play for reasons unknown to me. If you like the person, call/text them whenever you want.

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

Thinking about it, the men who’ve turned out to be seriously interested in me have played the least amout of “waiting game”, they’ve usually called or sent a text within a day or two of getting my number. The few who turned out to be wishy washy were the ones who’d wait three or so days before asking for/planning a date.

DrasticDreamer's avatar

I agree 100% with Facade. If you actually like someone and think you have a connection, call. What’s the point of waiting? It really is a game and it’s immature and tends to be played by people with little to no self-esteem. Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there. If it works, it works. If not, it’s not the end of the world. :)

Deepness's avatar

@Facade I agree.

I’d like to add to that by saying as long as you don’t call them after 10pm (many people do sleep early), or earlier than 1159am (many people sleep till noon), you should be fine. If they gave you their number, they are interested in getting to know you better. Be considerate.

marinelife's avatar

What is the point of waiting just to wait? Call and express interest. That is not stalkerish, Calling 20 times in 24 hours is not good of course.

chyna's avatar

I think if you wait too long to call it gives the other person time to wonder if they did the right thing in giving you their number. I remember giving a guy my number one evening and he called me after I got home just to see if I had gotten home safely. We dated quite a while after that.

eponymoushipster's avatar

girls like @Facade and @DrasticDreamer say that, but i’ve called/texted girls the next day, and they freak out that you’re gonna be all clingy, instead of just truly interested.

(no offense to @Facade or @DrasticDreamer, i’m sure you’re love gals)

Facade's avatar

@eponymoushipster Not all girls are hip to the jive :P

DrasticDreamer's avatar

@eponymoushipster They freaked out on you because they’re the kind of girls that you don’t want to know anyway. And see? Calling right away and having them freak out was proof that any extra time spent on them would be wasted time. :)

eponymoushipster's avatar

@Facade no doubt. and maybe i’m just too damn sexy for some of them.

@DrasticDreamer well put.

Dr_C's avatar

Wait.. don’t wait… as long as your approach is honest and light there’s no reason for freaking of any kind. As @Facade said some girls are just not hip to the jive… but in @eponymoushipster some girls are so accustomed to having mostly creepy guys call right away.. one that is genuinely interested doesn’t get the same treatment.

Waiting a couple of days can help offset the clingy factor… but anything more just makes you seem aloof or like you’re “playing it cool”... which gets old fast.


Disc2021's avatar

I thank you all for your input – perhaps it is just a self-esteem/self-conscious thing and I shouldn’t feel inclined to wait. I kind of thought “what’s the point in waiting?” myself (people give out numbers for a reason for that matter) but I just wanted some verification and insight. No one wants to come off as an obsessive stalker and I didn’t want to make that kind of impression falsely by doing something that could’ve easily been avoided.

chyna's avatar

So, what is your decision? How long will you wait to call?

Disc2021's avatar

@chyna I think I’ve decided on @DrasticDreamer‘s and your perception. Really I guess it is true that if they are interested – they’ll be happy to receive the phone call and as you’ve also pointed out – they might be wondering why you’re not calling if you wait too long. If they do freak out or back away – they dont deserve/appreciate the extra time and therefore they aren’t worth the investment.

SO no more waiting and once again, thank all of you for helping me theorize here. Pretty much everyone made a pretty valuable suggestion. I did contact the person within the next day and they actually seemed pretty excited to hear from me. w00t.

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