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talljasperman's avatar

What can I do to stop worring at nights about my inactivity?

Asked by talljasperman (21858points) January 17th, 2010

I suffer from anxiety from the pressure that has extended from my school years… I’m always worried about being inactive and I end up signing out 20 or so library books on various subjects and only reading one or two. I’m anxious at nights and I used to talk to family and friends till 5 in the morning about my life and academics and gossip. I don’t have a job and I just sleep all day and watch digital TV. when something is good on…I recently signed out Don Quixote and I am finding similarities in situation…like for example I like to dream that I’m qualified to talk about religion, science and academics to the few friends I have…But now I’m bored I can’t seem to read any of the 20 books I signed out and most of the TV. programs are boring…I would like to go back to university but I don’t know what field to enter…I got so unmotivated and uncomfortable at my old job that I applied for disability and I got labeled as permanently severely handicapped and I get sent a check and pills every month… I did manage to save $2000 and I ended up spending most of my money on food and Christmas gifts… I really messed up and I don’t know how to fix it… I really don’t like my options….I don’t smoke, drink, use drugs or own a car, or own a house…I rent with my mom so I don’t have to deal with the boredom and stress from administrating my life. Counseling doesn’t seem to help and the doctors keep telling me to just go for walks…I don’t want to walk anymore, I am sick of reading and watching TV., all I do I sleep and avoid people…my doctor tells me that what I am going through Is a good sign that I am recovering…what would you suggest Is wrong with me? What should I do? What would you do?

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18 Answers

ETpro's avatar

Fluther cured me. :-)

talljasperman's avatar

@ETpro I like fluther too.

SamIAm's avatar

Fluther is great. And I suggest going back to school also. What are you interested in? For me (I have often felt similar feelings throughout various stages of my life) it is art so I decided to take a leap, jump ship, move across the country alone and get my MFA in a subject that I am hoping to like. There are no certainties, it’s worth it to just take a risk and start something over. Like you, I have been sleeping all day, and don’t find much interest in other things… I have a hard time doing what I love, or used to love. I do go out with friends frequently though and I feel that once I begin school life will start to fall into place—or I’ll be back at square one and rediscovering myself all over again. The excitement of that is enough to keep me going…..

talljasperman's avatar

@Samantha_Rae I’m interested in computer animations of space and astromony

SamIAm's avatar

@talljasperman : I know nothing about that but you should do some research (maybe post a specific, industry related question here) and see what you can do with that… if you do what you love, it may be like not working! As for the being up at night, it’s hard to get past that… I do recommend not drugging or drinking, so that’s a great start. What also gets me through times of anxiety (especially at night) are my two cats, what about getting a pet?

talljasperman's avatar

@Samantha_Rae I would like a pet… my landlord however does not… I don’t think pet fish will survive the frequent blackouts in my town…I would like a cat… I love cats.

SamIAm's avatar

@talljasperman : Maybe if you explain your situation to your landlord they would understand? It’s worth a shot… I have had my cats for 11 years and I don’t know where I’d be without them. I’ve been having a rough few days and if they weren’t here, I would have been even more of a wreck! And some landlords are more open to allowing cats because they don’t bark! If you get a kitten, you can train it so that it’ll use the litter box… Just be prepared to answer to your landlord if you decide to talk to them! Good luck!

HTDC's avatar

You sound like an exact copy of me. I just can’t believe how much your question sounds like my life.

Nullo's avatar

IMO, you should try to get out more. Out of the house, and more importantly, out of your head. I recommend a physical job, if you can do it, but going to the gym or those long walks may have the same general effect (I personally hate pointless exercise, so it’s hard work or nothin’).
Last time I went hunting I realized that there’s something therapeutic about sitting still in the woods for a few hours at a time, especially when you start at 4 in the morning and can watch the sun come up. You might even consider actually hunting, to more sharply focus your attention on the world around you.
How’s your spiritual life doing? You ought to look into developing it.
Join a club.
Try learning a skill, like smithing or cobbling, or leatherworking, or gardening. Or something else that’s intellectually stimulating.

Goldfish do perfectly well in a conventional fishbowl; a friend of mine had the same fish in that setup for seven years. They are not, however, the most entertaining pets.

Sebulba's avatar

compose music

PandoraBoxx's avatar

There is a saying that work expands to the time alloted to it. When you have nothing particular to do, then the unbound time becomes chaos.

Create a high level schedule for yourself and try to stick to it as much as you are able to. Having purposefulness should help pull things together a bit. As an example, Monday – library and out to lunch. Tuesday – walking and picking up trash along the way (environmentalism as a purpose). Wednesday – something new from Thursday – bake bread, etc. Commit to doing whatever the day is scheduled for, if only for a short time. Take a walk every afternoon and go to the same coffee shop for a cup of coffee. Become a regular. Read the newpaper, ease into talking to people.

And hang out on Fluther.

Cruiser's avatar

Have you tried group therapy?? That with continued individual sessions has really helped someone I know. Also joint a group activity or team sport, bowling, darts, Volunteering is a great way to take your mind off things and get out of the house.

Walks in the woods and be very therapeutic.

ccrow's avatar

If your doctor thinks sleeping all the time & avoiding people is a good thing, it’s time for a new doc IMO.

Holden_Caulfield's avatar

I can completely relate to your dilemma. I, at one time, had the same problems. At times, I still do. What I have found is that I have so many interests, and I spread myself so thin, that I cannot truly indulge and satisfy each of them. Foe me, it became a matter oif shifting my interests in a rotating basis. I spend time on one thing that has my attention at the moment and I see it through to COMPLETION. Completion being the key. I then shift ficus to the another thing of interest for a period of time… seeeing it through to completion. Before I knew it, I was able to balance my life with ALL my interests and was able to also gain a sense of fulfillment as a result. For instance. I am a writer and a musician. So I play music and teach myself to become better as a musician. I move to writing. I write out my thoughts and become creative that way until the “well runs dry”, sp to speak. Then maybe I will read book after book for some time and learn soemthing. Go back to Music, but now I have been writing, and have read extensively on a variety of subjects, and it contributes to my music and I am now able to write ORIGINAL music with words that express my life experiences and knowledge. It is fluid, but they all cross-polinate to become something better. Of course, this is how I deal with the issue. May not always work for others, but worth a try! Identify those things that you love, spend time on each one separately, and then see how they come together after a period of time to create something new!! There is ZERO boredom in that! In fact, it helps you grow!

HungryGuy's avatar

Do you havea big empty basement? Try model railroading!

LeopardGecko's avatar

Well if you went to school, shouldn’t you have a degree and be applying for jobs?

Or if you didn’t get a degree, shouldn’t you be applying for jobs?

babaji's avatar

One thing to remember,
You are a perfect being,
You have the keys to the universe in the palm of your hand. and you have the Grace of your life’s Source within your every breath.
Life is so much the illusion because we can’t find “no satisfaction” within it’s limits.
But you are very lucky to have reached this point in your life.
Finding that something that makes everything right and cosy is at your grasp.
in a nutshell, the world as we know it is composed of our thoughts.
we think incessantly and create all of these frameworks that we weave into our reality.
Again in a nutshell, get beyond these thoughts and the world changes and becomes perfect.
Your treasured possession that you have is your breath. Simple awareness of your breath will give you a new focus on life. It is one of the “Real” things in your life that you can hold onto with your awareness that will help alleviate all of those feelings you are having.
Focusing your awareness on your breath will center yourself and create a balance within your life, that will free you and give you the impetus to delve into the things you enjoy without hesitation and with assurance.
When we are not centered, we become like the thoughts in the wind, swept from here to there. Being aware of our breath as we go about our life will bring stability, understanding, peace and clarity, and so much more.
This is Meditation. And as we look within ourselves, all things become clear.
This awareness of your breath you can take everywhere you go, and in whatever you do.
You can also just sit and relax and experience your breath.
It will bring you instant relaxation, relief, increased awareness, so many health benefits, and
oh yes, there is this thing about enlightenment that seems to happen.

Ron_C's avatar

It is good that you are at least interacting with other people on this site. I have trouble walking because of an accident that I had in 2000. I found that I can go a good distance on a bike so here’s my suggestion.

Start out small. Try to take short walks around the block. If you have any of that $2K left buy a bike. You can get a motorized bike for about $850. Ride the bike and use the motor to get home when you get tired. You will find that you need the motor less and less as time goes on.

I was in a similar situation. At first I had the bike on a stand and it took about 10 minutes just to get my leg over it. My first stationary ride was about 1 minute and I was soaking wet from exertion. I eventually built up to doing 16–20 mile trips.

I had another injury last fall and have to start over again and I will. Good luck to you and remember the more you exercise, the better you feel, the better you feel, the more you will exercise.

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