Social Question

Cruiser's avatar

What if you woke up a woman instead of a man (or vice versa), what would your life be like?

Asked by Cruiser (40421points) May 18th, 2010

Once you (and your SO if applicable) get past the initial shock and assuming you can keep your hands off of your new self for a reasonable amount of time, what would your life suddenly be like! What would be some of the great benefits and or sudden big bad bummer elements of the change??

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56 Answers

CMaz's avatar

I would become a nun.

All you horn dogs wanting a piece of my ass. Don’t know how the ladies handle it.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

I could check water levels from the bow of my boat using only my enormous dipstick….that’s about it.
Oh yes,I would do alot more cooking and cleaning—giggles—;)

Bluefreedom's avatar

I’m thinking it would be pretty miserable. After being male for 40+ years, there’s no way I could adapt accordingly to the female side of the equation. No benefits immediately spring to mind and a definite bummer would be having to suffer through PMS. No thanks.

rangerr's avatar

I could pee standing up!

Facade's avatar

Aside from all the sex stuff, I think I’d be the same. I think I’m a man on the inside haha
I’d probably go pee on things like @rangerr

stranger_in_a_strange_land's avatar

No change. I’m celibate now. I assume that at my age I’d be post-menopausal, so none of those issues. It might cause complications in relations with my lesbian friends though; or not, I’d likely be as ugly as a woman as I now am as a male.

BoBo1946's avatar

probably have heart attack….

CMaz's avatar

@stranger_in_a_strange_land – Brings up a good point. ;-)

If I did not become a nun. I would definitely become a lesbian.

Aethelwine's avatar

We have one bathroom for the five of us. I would be thrilled if I could step out the back door to pee if the loo is taken.

wilma's avatar

The being able to pee with more ease would be a plus I think.
I would want to experience a male orgasm, So I guess I’d have to do something about that, but I’m not sure what.

Coloma's avatar

Hmmm..well, I actually won ‘best dressed man’ at a come as the opposite sex costume party once. lol

Borrowed a neighbors telephone lineman garb, hardhat, toolbelt, work boots, with a flannel shirt stuffed to have a big belly, appropriate ‘bulge’ in my jeans, blonde moustache….I looked like Captain Kangaroo! lol

My ex husband wore short shorts with fishnet stockings, size 11 high heels, a skimpy tight tee shirt with a double DD bra and balloon boobs with a long curly wig.

He got ‘Best legs’ award!

Meh…I love being a woman, but it was pretty amazing how well I transformed into the opposite gender! lol

Cruiser's avatar

I am not surprised by any of the answers (some pretty funny ones too <<high fives all around>>) but gee whiz already can we get past the bathroom peeing issues and explore the what if’s of being a parent or at work or the other pressing issues at hand if you were suddenly the opposite sex?

Aethelwine's avatar

@Cruiser Don’t want to piss you off. I’ll see what else I can come up with. ;)

Facade's avatar

@Cruiser I can’t think of any pressing issues being a man brings on.

Cruiser's avatar

@jonsblond No worries here…fire away!!
@Facade If only you knew!! lol!

marinelife's avatar

My leadership qualities would not be labeled as “ball busting” or “aggressive”. I could do anything I want to do, and no one would look askance.

CMaz's avatar

And, I would be the biggest bitch you have ever met.

Coloma's avatar

I think that inspite of all the progress in womens rights and workforce participation over the years that it must suck to be a man in the sense that rarely, if ever, is it okay for a man to not work.

It is still much more accepted for a woman to not work, raise a family or take time off for whatever reasons.

Even though we may pay lip service to a stay at home dad, I truly think it is a rare man that could not suffer his self esteem or feel truly okay with being Mr. Mom for a long stretch of time. Although I, personally, totally support that choice.

While I am all for equal relationship contribution ( as is reasonably possible in the sense that no situation will ever be perfectly 50/50 all the time ) I do feel that it sucks for men to have less options in this area.

Staalesen's avatar

I think i would go to sleep again, and hope to wake up beeing myself again :)

partyparty's avatar

I could leave the toilet seat up, leave the top off toothpaste. Have several coffees and a casual read of the newspaper before going to work.
Ooooh yes, and I could snore all night and keep everyone awake!

Cruiser's avatar

@partyparty You make it sound so easy and wonderful! I tend to overlook how good I got it!! BTW you left out leaving a pile of clothes on the bathroom floor ;)

HTDC's avatar

@Bluefreedom There’s no “suffering” at that time of month. Gosh you make it sound like we’re living in Africa…;) One little pill and it’s all good.

Coloma's avatar

I’d like the mastery over power tools,and being free of that femine fear that something is on the verge of blowing up! lol

Being single after a long marriage has been great, but now…if I can’t fix it with super glue, string, baling wire or tape I have to pay my male help boatloads of cash! lol

It’s a wise choice through as being a left handed right brained blonde staying away from dangerous tools is in my best interest! lol

partyparty's avatar

@Cruiser BTW you left out leaving a pile of clothes on the bathroom floor
Ah yes you are so correct. The list is endless :-)

zoardyeck's avatar

i will go back to sleep at once and when i wake up it still the situation i will hold my on breathe you know what i mean

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

I don’t think much would change.

aprilsimnel's avatar

I’d be a 5’1” man. That might pose some difficulties. I imagine that some issues I have now in terms of dealing with other people (being taken as younger and more immature than my actual age, having to use ladders or getting assistance all the time for things on shelves, getting squashed on public transport, etc.) would be compounded as a small man. Men mostly, but some women as well, seem to have no problem making fun of men for things they can’t control, like their height, or loss of hair, or whatever. It would be a challenge, definitely. And of course, being called “Little Man” by my relatives would get on my nerves.

Now if I woke up a 5’11” man, hey, my lot would definitely improve. No one would think of me as a being a bossy bitch, I’d just be an authoritative man. I’d play lots more footy. No more catcalling! I could eat more food!

Berserker's avatar

Well if I woke up as a man, I’d probably wake up with morning wood, and as such, I’d be walking around naked in my appartment with my new found manhood and yelling WHO DA MAN?! WHO DA MAAAAAN?!!

Srsly though, I have no idea. I’d go see a doctor and be like, dude what the hell.

Cruiser's avatar

@Symbeline Just wait till the Doc gave you the script for Viagra and you will be back in the apratment in no time yelling WHO DA MAN?! WHO DA MAAAAAN?!!!

dpworkin's avatar

I’d have to get a whole new fuckin’ wardrobe.

Cruiser's avatar

@dpworkin not to mention the manicure, pedicure and bikini waxing! I bet the first one is a bitch! :O

Vunessuh's avatar

I’d finally have the right plumbing to be able to bang @Symbeline. XD

majorrich's avatar

After playing with my new found toys, I don’t think much would change. I’m not very hairy, so waxing wouldn’t be too too bad. (I mean it would suck, but I guess I could handle it) I kind of wonder what the Wife would think.
I wonder what the crotch vent in my cars A/C would feel like in a skirt? Should I go Commando in summer?
I could play golf from the red tees!!!! YeeeeeehAAwwww so My golf bag would lose some weight.

perspicacious's avatar

I guess I would be gay because I don’t see myself with a woman.

Trillian's avatar

I would hate it. I like being a woman, and cannot imagine having that freaky thing hanging off the front of me like an after thought, or those two other things drooping down between my legs, getting in the way. I’d probably hurt myself. And my kids need their Mommie. Especially my youngest daughter.
No thanks.

filmfann's avatar

I really don’t understand the intricacies of applying make-up, doing hair, or dealing with the monthy visitor, so I am sure I would be obviously lost.
But, then again, it ain’t Gregor Samsa.

evandad's avatar

I imagine it would suck. Literally.

FutureMemory's avatar

@Trillian I would hate it. I like being a woman, and cannot imagine having that freaky thing hanging off the front of me like an after thought, or those two other things drooping down between my legs, getting in the way.

Believe it or not they don’t get in the way. I have only been injured once ‘down there’, and that was back in my elementary school days when this stupid kid I was playing catch with aimed just a little too low..

dpworkin's avatar

Don’t believe him, @Trillian. it sucks to have external genitalia, as anyone who has had to tweeze his underwear out the the folds of his scrotum after a long drive will tell you.

Trillian's avatar

Plumbing and genitalia aside, I just really enjoy being a woman.
In addition, I’m exposed to a dreadful sight at work all the time and I won’t get graphic with anyone but every single time I see it I shudder and silently thank god that I don’t have that…

dpworkin's avatar

Youth wants to know! Get graphic!

janbb's avatar

I have never envied anyone’s penis. Just sayiin’

(O.K. – maybe once in a while when hiking in the woods, but that’s all, Dr. Freud.)

Neizvestnaya's avatar

I’d be excited, my partner would be panicked, there would be heartbreak because he’d leave me and then I’d drown my sorrows between the boobs of some fabulous woman who I’d treat like a queen.

janbb's avatar

@Neizvestnaya I’ll volunteer for that position.

meagan's avatar

I’d be King. Or Pope.
No, I’m completely serious!

majorrich's avatar

I would for sure call the Enquirer, the Globe and every other magazine I could think of to document the ‘spontaneous mutation’. Then I would write a book for a movie deal.

Cruiser's avatar

@meagan I seriously think you would need more than a mere sex change to become King or the Pope, either way what would you do if you were suddenly the King or the Pope?

meagan's avatar

@Cruiser Scary, powerful things.

mattbrowne's avatar

Find out about multiple orgasms?

Cruiser's avatar

@meagan They already do that!! What would you do differently! :))

Jewel's avatar

I would take my car to the mechanic and not have to pay the going “female” rate (aka: RIP OFF).

I’d demand, and get, the wage of men in my business, instead of the high end female rate which is lower than the low end male rate.

I’d be thrilled to spend 80% less for my clothes, and get by with a wardrobe 80% smaller.

While I love being female, and have no desire to change that, there are some terribly unbalanced things that I wish I could change.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

I think I’d have to sit by myself for a while and toy with my new appendage… after that I’d get down to business with everything that would have to change. Egads, does that mean I would be gay? DIVORCE!!!

little8632g's avatar

Im a man. If i woke up a woman – id be a wild slut – for sure.

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