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hug_of_war's avatar

I don't like my job anymore. How do I deal?

Asked by hug_of_war (9859 points ) December 5th, 2013 from iPhone

I am a teacher assistant in a special needs class. I no longer enjoy my job even though I love my students because of one of the assistants (she’s technically a float but she won’t leave).

It makes my room overstaffed (which may seem good but too many cooks is not helpful). I feel claustrophobic (I love any opportunity to take a couple students and work elsewhere just to have more space) and useless (I used to feel valued, now not so much). I like being busy (isn’t enough to do with so many adults)

She calls everyone honey which I hate. It makes me feel stabby. I like working as part of a team but I am used to having tasks I do independently and she is always in my face offering help. I know I sound like a bad person but I just don’t like how she is.

Anyway, my point is I just don’t feel happy anymore, or an asset, and I need to stay at this job at least through the end of the school year.

I realize I can’t change my situation only how I react to it. How can I help myself be less grumpy and be more positive? I know being autistic transitions are harder for me, especially ones that screw with the structure I do best with. I need a better way to cope instead of getting so stressed out and making a big fuss out of little things because I know I can’t complain about what’s really getting to me.

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9 Answers

YARNLADY's avatar

Get some help from a counselor. They can help you sort out your options.

gondwanalon's avatar

You can run but you can’t hide from people who are hard to deal with because they are nearly everywhere. You can benefit and grow by learning how to deal with various less than desirable coworkers.
Instead of dwelling on the negative aspects of your coworker try to keep in mind the main reason that you are working which is to teach students. Also in this economy the thankful that you even have a job.

I’ve been working for 35 years in five different medical centers and have dealt successfully with a lot of different types of coworkers. I’ve seen just about all the different types of bad behaviors.

So get tough and deal with your situation. You will be stronger from your Perseverance.

zenvelo's avatar

You need to talk with the teacher on getting some additional work that you can lead and complete without interference.

It actually sounds like the offending assistant is in the same boat as you, she has time on her hands so she gets in the way of everyone else.

Seaofclouds's avatar

What about trying to come up with projects or tasks for her to do? If you aren’t in a position to do that, point her in the direction of someone who is. Just say, “I don’t need any additional help right now, how about checking with _____.” Then smile and go back to your work.

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

Focus on things you do that help others that you do better than anyone else no matter what your work situation. You have special abilities and talents. Capitalize on the joy that comes from using those to benefit others.

janbb's avatar

I would talk to her in a non-offending way and suggest that she back off a bit when you are on a project. You can also say, “I know you mean it in the best way, but I would prefer that you not call me honey. It just doesn’t sit well with me.”

hug_of_war's avatar

Thanks everyone. Just writing about it helped me put things in perspective.

meenasky's avatar

Sometimes when I start hating my job, I just try to work as hard and as productive as possible, in this way I don’t have time for thinking over my emotions. I know it sounds odd but it works for me.

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